September 12, 2005

Britney Spears gives birth, Sienna Miller doesn't, and Tyra Banks does porn

• Britney Spears was rushed to the hospital over the weekend, sparking rumors that she's had her baby four weeks early. Her reps have denied everything and I believe them. If she had given birth, I'm sure I would have felt a disturbance in the Force. Get the Star Wars reference? I'm hilarious.

• Sienna Miller has killed her pregnancy rumors by starting a new film in November, which would screw up production if she was to suddenly gain baby weight. I don't want to point any fingers, but I'm smelling abortion. Then again, I'm at the abortion clinic right now smelling all the patients.

• There's a look-alike of Tyra Banks running around the adult industry, posing naked on covers and making porno movies. Not bad, but I'm more interested in the naked Rosie O'Donnell look-alike.

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