Paris Hilton

Ashlee Simpson

She's not as hot as her sister, but she's just as dumb. Maybe if she laid off the black hair dye and stuck with her natural (?) blonde hair, Ashlee Simpson would be a little more pleasing on the eyes. I've never understood the white woman's obsession with dying their hair pitch black, seeing as how it looks absolutely terrible and, no matter who you are or what you're wearing, it makes you look like a damn goth. And in case you think that being goth is cool, let me just remind you that it isn't and that you're an idiot if you think it is. The only person that can pull off goth is Angelina Jolie, and that's because she's so gorgeous that she could pretty much be dressed any which way and she would still look great. Giant diaper and shaved head? As long as it's on Angelina Jolie it probably looks wicked hot.

Paris Hilton

Looks like Miss Mantis Girl is finally sick of looking like an emaciated boy and has decided to make that delightful leap into womanhood. Although she had made previous claims that she would never get implants, Star Magazine reports that Paris has started cracking under the pressure of her big boobed peers and is considering surgery. When you're faced with Lindsay Lohan's ginormous melons in your face at all the parties you attend, it's only natural that you would start feeling inadequate. Paris says she only wants to go up to a B-cup but (God willing), the plastic surgeons will be able to convince her to go for the coveted DD. Can you even imagine a skinny girl like Paris with huge Pamela Anderson-like breasts? That would be the visual equivalent of a miracle. A really sexy miracle.

The Superficial News

- Justin Timberlake has been accused of cheating on Cameron Diaz, according to America's New York Post newspaper. [Read]

- Nick Carter's mum and twin sister have accused Paris Hilton of faking her bruises and have defended Nick against the allegations that he had beaten Paris. [Read]

- Married life for pop diva Britney Spears would start at a $6.9 million, eight-bedroom bungalow she has bought for her husband and herself in the beach town of Malibu. [Read]

- Hollywood movie star Janet Leigh, best known as the knife attack victim in Alfred Hitchcock's "Psycho," has died at the age of 77, CNN reported on Monday. [Read]

- Boyband heart-throbs Simon Webbe and Lee Ryan left two lovers so Blue that the girls turned into lesbians. [Read]

- Actress Kate Winslet won't have plastic surgery despite saying her boobs look like 'the ears of a dog'. [Read]

Christina Aguilera

Christina Aguilera

There's no denying that Christina Aguilera can be hot, but her choice in appearance is usually questionable. When she's done up right and wearing the proper clothes, she can look like the tiny little hottie that she is. Unfortunately, she's usually allowed to take command of her own wardrobe, meaning she usually turns out all weird and ugly looking. I guess her current look is some sort of Marilyn Monroe / Gwen Stefani fusion, but it just doesn't look all that great. Maybe if she toned down the lipstick and got rid of that stupid fake mole. Seriously now, who does that? On the lameness scale, that's right up there with giving yourself a fake hickie with a vacuum cleaner.

View Christina Aguilera Gallery

Pamela Anderson

Even after two kids and a multitude of relationships to tattooed rockers, Pamela Anderson still manages the time to pose half naked for all her fans. At the ripe age of 37 you'd expect her breasts to start looking saggy and weird, but thanks to the magic of plastic surgery, they've somehow managed to hang on to their firmness. And without her oversized inflated grapefruit breasts, Pamela Anderson really wouldn't have anything in this world. Well, except for her kids and all, but those little buggers don't count. We're all about the boobs here.

Preview of Pamela Anderson's Official 2005 Calendar

The Superficial News

- British newcomer Keira Knightley has been voted the sexiest movie star of all time. The 19-year-old beat Hollywood beauties such as Angelina Jolie, Halle Berry, Charlize Theron, Jennifer Lopez and Julia Roberts to the title She also pipped screen legends Marilyn Monroe and Brigitte Bardot. [Read]

- Newly-wedded couples usually opt to spend the first few weeks of their married life away from family and at some romantic place, but pop star Britney Spears and her hubby Kevin Federline are celebrating their honeymoon with Britney's mother Lynne in Kentwood, Louisiana. [Read]

- Film bosses have delayed the opening of movie epic Alexander — because the hero is too gay. Stud Colin Farrell plays the legendary commander, but insiders say studio execs want to cut some of his homosexual love scenes. [Read]

Paris Hilton

Awful Plastic Surgery has a little expose on Paris Hilton and her alleged awful plastic surgery. Although I don't think that Paris looks all that great (I'm not really into insects), I'm going to have to say that she does look better than she did before. Aside from the blue contacts, I can't really figure out what she had work on, but whatever it is it's an improvement. Then again, maybe it's just that hideous purple dress she's wearing in her 'before' pictures that's throwing me off. Ugly clothes has a way of doing that to me.