Gisele Bundchen

Michelle Trachtenberg

Remember in Eurotrip when Michelle got wasted on absinthe and started making out with her twin brother? That was good times, man. I guess when you're running out of ideas for a story, you can just throw in a little incest action and call it a day. Anyways, the only thing Eurotrip was missing (besides hardcore incestuous sex) was Michelle's nipples. Unfortunately for her, real life isn't as editable as film so here's a fun little glimpse of her nipple popping out. I never know whether to consider pictures like these nudity or not so I'll just throw in a 'nsfw' and let you decide for yourself.

View Michelle Trachtenberg Nipple Slip (nsfw)

The Superficial News

- Paris Hilton is reportedly the star of a second steamy homemade porn and drugs video. The blonde heiress...has now been caught getting down and dirty with ex-boyfriends Nick Carter and Jason Shaw. [Read]

- This is the chunky lesbian lover of glamorous Sex And The City star Cynthia Nixon. Red-haired Christine Marinoni is pictured for the first time wearing a man’s lumberjack-style checked shirt and a tank top. [Read]

- MTV reality stars Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey are allegedly considering ending their marriage because the former 98 Degrees hunk is sick of her "dumb blonde" behavior. [Read] -- I smell bullshit

- Legendary ladies' man Jack Nicholson has set his sights on a new conquest - model Kate Moss. The smooth-talking 68-year-old actor is said to be smitten with the British beauty and is intent on taking things further, despite her tender age of 31. [Read]

Heather Locklear

I'm not even going to pretend I understand how Heather Locklear manages to look so good for her age. I would normally go with the typical "she's a vampire" hypothesis, but I've yet to see a vampire with hair as blonde and a face as beautiful as Heather's. Most vampires I come across look like really ugly versions of Angelina Jolie during her creepy years. Man, I'm so glad she got over that creepy phase and blossomed into her "I'm super fucking hot" phase. That phase kicks so much ass.

Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen have just signed a 10-year distribution deal with Warner Home Video that will net them an immediate eight-figure advance. Blah blah blah they're rich, okay I don't care. What I'm more interested in are these giant sunglasses that have become the latest fashion trend amongst spoiled girls. As if Uggs weren't bad enough, who off and decided that wearing oversized novelty sunglasses would be cool? Those are the kinds of sunglasses that my four year old cousin wears, and that's because she's four years old and doesn't know anything. I'm not sure when it happened, but somewhere along the way "ugly" became the new "trendy." From trucker hats to Uggs to these new giant sunglasses, fashion is heading towards the look of crazy homeless people, and last time I checked, crazy homeless people were pretty damn low on the fashion scale.

Gisele Bundchen