Anthony Kiedis’ kidney: ‘Okay, time out.’ (And other news)

This stuff might’ve happened:

- Anthony Kiedis has a close call with kidney failure. He knew things were bleak when the Olsen twins kept hanging around. They’re like vultures, but for junkies. [NY Daily News]

- Tom Cruise hopes Suri pursues acting. Someone’s gotta start making money in that house. E-Meters don’t grow on trees you know. On this planet…. [Us Magazine]

- Dennis Quaid and his wife settles their dispute with Cedars-Sinai for $750,000 after they overdosed their twin infants with Herparin. He reportedly threatened to “go all Innerspace on their asses.” You don’t mess with that. [TMZ]

- Naomi Watts and Liev Schreiber name their newborn son Samuel proving they’re weirdos who don’t want their kid to be ridiculed his entire life. Pfft. Can you believe these assholes? [People]

Photos: WENN