Last week, Anthony Cumia of SiriusXM’s The Opie & Anthony Show fired off of barrage of racist and violent tweets after allegedly being “attacked” by a black woman who he was more than likely trying to take creep shots of. It was the tail end of a long history of racism that’s been amped up to the point where it couldn’t be masked as some stupid shock jock shtick anymore, and comedians like Bill Burr were coming on the show and basically telling Cumia to shut the fuck up. So late Thursday night, SiriusXM fired him sparking an inevitable Internet shitstorm from other racists who still have no idea how the first amendment works, and it’s literally the same, exhausting battle lines all over again:
Conservatives and libertarians are squawking about “F’EEDOM MASPEECH!” even though Anthony Cumia was fired entirely by the sacred, holy forces of The Market – not the government – per the will of a corporation and all its Jesus-blessed personitude. Not to mention, he’ll land squarely on his feet on Fox News, AM radio or some sort of right-wing podcast and continue making buckets of money.
Liberals are wasting their time trying to explain to conservatives and libertarians the irony of everything I just said back there. — Wait. *looks at how long I’ve been writing this post* Sonofabitch.
And some white chick from the south will eventually ask on my Facebook page, “Why does everyone have to get so offended?” before sagely pointing out that slavery happened a long time ago, so really, it shouldn’t count.
Except my new favorite responses are the cries of “The thought police are coming for you next, Fish!” because a.) like these people have ever read Orwell. b.) If by thought police, you mean advertisers, then yes, I can be absolutely fucked at any given moment and am genuinely amazed each and every day that doesn’t happen. Welcome to the broadcast business since the exact second it was invented. And c.) What the fuck am I supposed to even do with that information? Jump in bed with you shitheads and go “No, wait, racism is good!” because your Glenn Beckian grasp of 1984 thinks a collective desire to shake off old bigotries will lead to The Hunger Games? We’re talking about momentarily inconveniencing a racist millionaire by making him get another job where he’ll still make more millions, not sending people to the goddamn gulag. Call a doctor if that hate-boner lasts more than four hours, V for Vendetta.