Anne Heche’s divorce turns nasty

May 18th, 2007 // 44 Comments
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Anne Heche’s divorce has gotten nasty after her estranged husband called her a poor parent with “bizarre and delusional behavior,” and requested $33,000 a month in support and primary custody of their 5-year-old son.

Heche, 37, countered by releasing a statement saying Laffoon has “resorted to lies with the court because Anne would not cave in to his astronomical money demands” – including what Heche said was actually $45,000 in monthly support. “For the past several years, the child’s father has refused to get a job in order to contribute financially to the child’s care,” says the statement.

In her autobiography, Call Me Crazy, Anne says she was mentally ill the first 31 years of her life after being sexually abused by her dad, claiming she had an alter ego that was the daughter of God and half-sibling of Jesus named “Celestia” who had contacts with extraterrestrial life forms. No, seriously. Anne Heche is 100% out of her mind. Her ex-husband could be a baby-eating bear and he should still get custody of their kid.

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  1. NicotineEyePatch

    As long as she has her tinfoil helmet she’ll be fine.

  2. So is she going back to women again?

  3. Binky

    Ellen should do a show on this.

  4. BarbadoSlim

    Tweeker whore.

    I’d still insert my penis in her and have her fetch me a Latte though.

  5. sweetnsnooty

    Just another trendy Hollywood divorce, so what else is new? *yaaawn*

  6. Stop, Drop and Roll

  7. Who the ballsack gives a shit about Anne Heche?

  8. getyourhandoutofmycat

    What happened to her being a rug muncher?

  9. The_Squizz

    Maybe now she can go back to lickin’ carpets.

  10. #8 that was just a passing phase. Kinda like nipple rings.

  11. labman

    I kinda love Anne, she elevates crazy to a whole new level.

    She started an affair with her co-star from Men in Trees despite them both being married – He romantic choices make Lindsay Lohan’s look canny!

  12. Chad

    Are we sure that the baby is his, and not, say, Bigfoot’s? Also, why can’t she just become a scientologist like the rest of the crazy Hollywood people? It would be so much easier to categorize.

  13. Don Jeans

    dude get some fucking originality. you recycle the same metaphors over and over. it’s tiring. last week it was pyschologist eating bear, now it’s baby eating bear?

  14. getyourhandoutofmycat

    # 10 Thanks for the visual of Anne Heche with nipple rings….lucky I haven’t eaten yet

  15. captain obvious

    um, what the hell did he expect? given her past history, which included a long term lesbo relationship w/ Degenerate (ack!)and her crazy wanderings and ufo moments…what the eff did think he was getting into?! Poor kid, thats all I can say.

  16. bungoone

    if she was mentally ill for the first 31 years of her life, what happened that made her not mentally ill for the past 6?

  17. YouRang

    #16 I’m pretty sure she still has a big fat case of the crazies.

  18. djthecat

    Yeah, she is just a big bag of crazy. However, if I were a lesbian, I would date Ellen…

  19. J Mohr

    Just because someone is a celebrity, does not mean that they cannot be a nut. She was once a lesbian, then she got married, then she had a kid.

    She was a nut then, she is a nut now.

  20. .
    I have little sympathy for anybody that claims not to know that Ann Was crazy.

    That said, hey, she only got all that money by prentending to like going down on Ellen’s Snizz, so I say he should take all he can get. Now Ann will have to find another Gullible Lesbian to pretend to like.

  21. robo

    all we can do is feel really sorry for the baby she helped bring in to this world.

  22. Superevil

    Sounds like my kinda woman.

  23. ToiletDuck

    This is what happens when you suppress your sexuality – she REALLY likes pussy…

    Maybe she will get back together with Ellen??

  24. djthecat

    Portia De Rossi is way prettier, so I don’t think Ellen will take her back…

  25. lickmybutt

    i freakin love crazy people. they are my favorite.

    only 4 more days until my birthday!! WOOO

  26. LookAtThatTaTa

    Crazy bitch. WITH HERPES MIND YOU so I would not hit that with your dick….

    She was just doing their crazy shit when 911 happened… I bet she was all pissy…

  27. KatieKates

    You’d think her husband would have realized she was a psycho whore years ago. Personally, neither one of these freaks deserve a kid.

  28. DolefulPineapple

    Oh no bitches, we better call up Tyrone twice today with this mess i be lookin at! Uh no, dis woman was munchin’ carpets for a while, now she gettin divorced? Ahhh hellll noooo! Ellen D is too fly fo her anyways. Saw her in dat remake of psycho and I was about to get crunk on dat tv set. Fo sho. Woot woot she betta go black dis time, ain’t she never gonna go back!

  29. Chauncey Gardner

    About time her marriage caught up. Anne Heche has been nasty for years.

  30. Chauncey Gardner

    And, isn’t it hilarious that somebody named “Laffoon” is suing Anne Heche for divorce because SHE’S crazy?

  31. Dan

    No, I’d do ‘er.

  32. It´s so obvious the heartless bitch is bi-polar, how come no one tells her?

  33. These are too funny! crazy crazy people!

  34. she is crazy as hell, but I bet you her sex is good! Steve Martin, she was with him for 2 years, and just broke up with him, he claimed that she “took his heart out, and stomped on it” Ellen, she was dating her, and what do you know, out of the blue, broke her heart, This Camera Guy, she up, and married him, and had a kid, SELFFISHLY, because she know’s she a nut, anyway, she breaks his heart, I think that this guy need to watch out…..this bitch sex is great, but her heart is cold!!!!!!!

  35. I feel sorry for her…
    Shez fucked up from her
    dad…she should of killed
    hiz azz.
    She lookz blitzed…

    my mom said she played on the
    soap”Another World” about 20
    yrs. ago as Vicki and Marley,
    twinz and she played both
    partz….

  36. sharpeidude

    This is a bunch of bullshit! The bitch misses the taste of muff is all.

  37. sticksanastone

    who the hell IS anne heche?

  38. MariJoy

    No Duh – This was obvious from when she was with Ellen (anyone remember her wandering out of teh car into the desert babbling untelligibly?)

  39. Winston Legthigh

    The only useful thing to do with a woman of this ilk would be to skull fuck her, beat her unconcious and throw her into a ditch.

  40. I C WIENER

    Them crazy psycho bitches are always a good
    F**k! I’m sure Anne picked up a whole new set of skills from them aliens, RAMA RAMA DING DING.
    Anne I’d boil your panties and drink the broth

  41. Vi

    Dude, she’s b*i*s*e*x*u*a*l.

    A lot of people are. Chill.

    Can’t help you with the imaginary friend, though–mine tells me not to get involved…

  42. FWW1

    For more stories on divorce, check out http://www.firstwivesworld.com — real stories from women all across America who’ve come together to share their stories of triumph and tribulation surrounding divorce. No experts, no psychologists, just real women, all with a very similar way of life. Log on and prepare to get uplifted.

    Taking stigma out of divorce…one woman at a time?

  43. Actually Heche plays the ex wife of a high school basketball coach, who since his house burned down, becomes a male escort to supplement his income.

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