Anne Hathaway dumped Raffaello Follieri over dead flowers

You’d think the reason Anne Hathaway and Raffaello Follieri broke up is because of his illegal activities bilking real estate investors out of money by pretending to work for the Vatican. Guess again. Turns out the deal-breaker was an arrangement of wilting cherry blossoms, according to The Sun:

She said of the flowers: “They lasted a month and were beautiful even as they died. Raffaello always liked things fancier and perfect and told our maid to throw them out. That was when I knew we saw things differently.”

So, let me see if I got this straight:

1. Being a giant ball of fraud who dresses like a priest in his confidence scams: Let’s move in together!
2. Apparently not even able to speak English: What’re ya gonna do?
3. Took nude photos of you: Adorable.
4. Made you pay the bills: So dreamy.
5. Threw away some dead flowers: GET THE FUCK OUT!

Ladies, I really don’t want to believe all women are crazy, but goddamn

Photos: Splash News