Anna Nicole Smith’s lawyer and spokesman, Howard K. Stern, issued a confusing statement yesterday in regards to the rumors surrounding Anna Nicole being pregnant.
“If Anna Nicole is pregnant, she obviously doesn’t want anybody to know yet,” Stern wrote in an e-mail Thursday to The Associated Press. “If she’s not pregnant, she’s not denying the rumor because she thinks it’s funny how much of a stir it’s causing. She’ll leave it up to you to guess which one it is.”
What’s the point of sending out a statement if all you’re gonna do is make things more confusing. He could’ve Xeroxed a page from the dictionary and attached a hand drawn map and it would’ve been more informative. More entertaining too, because maps are fun. Pirates use them.























Yayday | May 5, 2006 at 4:31 pm
Wow – Big Time Celebrity!
griffmills | May 5, 2006 at 4:32 pm
hit it or not? that is the question
Yayday | May 5, 2006 at 4:32 pm
Want to bet that she will name the kid “PICKLE”
Land-Man | May 5, 2006 at 4:32 pm
I can confirm that she’s pregnant, she loves doing it Land-style.
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 4:33 pm
Wow… I’m not a huge fan – but she looks hot in that picture!
Kinda like jewel there —->
Haroof | May 5, 2006 at 4:33 pm
Wow, she actually does look hot in that picture.
Hmmmm.
Yayday | May 5, 2006 at 4:35 pm
Hey Boredmiff
Great post – pretty funny with the arrow
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 4:36 pm
jewel is a hag.
ANS is the shizzle, love her crucifix
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 4:36 pm
its boredmilf not boredmiff
Italian Stallion | May 5, 2006 at 4:38 pm
Who died?
Land-Man | May 5, 2006 at 4:38 pm
That ain’t no crucifix. It’s a Land-Necklace which I intentionally shot in that pattern.
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 4:40 pm
the land-man has artistic ablilities…
Italian Stallion | May 5, 2006 at 4:43 pm
For some reason I have the urge to “Sean Connery” this dumb bitch……..
tits_on_snack | May 5, 2006 at 4:43 pm
Howard Stern, what a tool. Not only is his name easily confused with the other Howard Stern which is reason enough to annoy me, I simply want to kick him in the nuts for being such a simpering douchebag all the time. He’s more annoying than Anna Nicole.
UCSD | May 5, 2006 at 4:44 pm
Land man is a tool. You have to be able to get an erection to shoot a load.
krisdylee | May 5, 2006 at 4:44 pm
Hot? Especially with them linebacker shoulder pads…. hot like Dynasty circa 19??
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:44 pm
You may think she looks hot now, but just remember, she has the potential to be a grower.
Grphdesi23 | May 5, 2006 at 4:44 pm
I think its
Howard “I would lick her pussy” K. Stern’s
child.
inspector11 | May 5, 2006 at 4:47 pm
i think this lawyer is actually a 13 year old goth chick. here’s my reasoning:
1. goth chicks are obnoxious and therby qualified for legal training.
2. the idea that anyone lies because they like watching other people discuss their behavior is a clear sign that you are either a.) anna nicole smith; or b.)you are cutting yourself in the bathroom after biology class.
i can’t wait for the first infant to endorse trim-spa!
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:48 pm
I’m personally sick of looking at the “wispy, thoughtful” Jewel… and BTW, that is so touched up.
Edna Bambrick | May 5, 2006 at 4:48 pm
Im glad to see that you all are keeping it clean! Good Job!
tsarinaamanda | May 5, 2006 at 4:49 pm
If she is pregnant, she’s just gonna get fat again. What the hell is up with fat celeb women losing a ton of weight and then getting knocked up? Stupid cows should’ve done it BEFORE they lost the weight! Still not sure WHY anyone would want a kid, though…annoying little crotchfruits…kinda makes me want to rip out my uterus with a coathanger.
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:49 pm
#21: Shove a zucchini up your dried up cunt, Edna.
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 4:50 pm
Edna!!!
tsarinaamanda | May 5, 2006 at 4:50 pm
Then I’ll donate it to Tom Cruise. I bet he’ll eat it. Maybe with fava beans and a nice Chianti.
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 4:51 pm
@22
No one wants to fuck them when they’re fat
Land-Man | May 5, 2006 at 4:51 pm
I met Anna at a plus-sized store where I was shopping for condoms.
Sincerely,
Your friendly neighborhood Land-Man
Vas Deferens | May 5, 2006 at 4:51 pm
Edna loves the cock.
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:53 pm
You buy condoms at Lane Bryant? I always knew you were a chubby-chaser.
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 4:53 pm
that mcdonalds “asian salad” yoga ad is disturbing on so many levels.
what the fuck makes a salad “asian” anyhow??? oranges?
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:55 pm
Actually they’re “mandarin” oranges.. get it? How silly!
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 4:55 pm
they should come out with a “puerto rican salad,” and the only difference is it takes an hour to make
BarbadoSlim | May 5, 2006 at 4:56 pm
If she’s doing it Land style, she must have a Land-gina?
pinky_nip | May 5, 2006 at 4:56 pm
How about an African American Salad? We’ll throw some watermelon and ribs in it.
Land-Man | May 5, 2006 at 4:57 pm
I had a Puerto Rican salad and it tried to steal my car and rape my girlfriend.
Tatamo | May 5, 2006 at 4:57 pm
#22 why dont you take yourself up on that…then when your done…shove the coat hanger down your throat…
radio4play | May 5, 2006 at 4:58 pm
howard stern, how ironic..
First!
TCLTC
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 4:58 pm
my African American salad sold me some crack last night
Spindoc | May 5, 2006 at 5:03 pm
Can Child Services preemtively abort the baby and insert it into the uterus of somebody who won’t be a psycho drug addict mother?
Iambananas | May 5, 2006 at 5:04 pm
SAhe was funnier when she was fat.
BarbadoSlim | May 5, 2006 at 5:06 pm
My Anglo american salad: killed most of the American indians then stole their land, after that, it enslaved all the people that were minding thier own business in africa, then exploited them for a couple of hundred years, then went to the middle east stole all the oil to put it in her SUVs then complained when the towel heads blew them the hell up on 9-11…and now it bitches and moans like a fucking cunt that nobody likes her.
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 5:06 pm
@39
Actually… they can…
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 5:08 pm
41: that’s one *busy* fucking salad
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 5:09 pm
but is also obviously far more superior to any other salad ever
boredmilf | May 5, 2006 at 5:12 pm
#44 I hope you aren’t serious…. just breaking #41′s balls…
Land-Man | May 5, 2006 at 5:12 pm
That salad created modern civilization, and is the envy of all other salads in the world. There’s no rules to the world folks, and the white salad kicked everyone’s asses fair and square. If you can’t play a real man salad’s game, go home and cry to your mommies.
Show some respect.
Fisher55 | May 5, 2006 at 5:13 pm
totally, milf, i’m cool like that
Sweetsens8tion | May 5, 2006 at 5:24 pm
Hey Everyone..Just released photo of LAMBANANAS…He/She is sooooooooo damn sexy!
COME SEE ALL:
http://www.derekhail.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/05/5-5-2006%20-%20unsexy%20header.jpg
buckinggrimace | May 5, 2006 at 5:27 pm
WTF tossed salad is more like it – “roll over for a taste”?
TCLTC (and tossed salad).
Jennifer Juniper | May 5, 2006 at 5:28 pm
Yeah! My first post! I think Anna Nicole is beautiful and I would do her.