Despite her lawyer’s denial that she’s not pregnant, Anna Nicole Smith was spotted at Los Angeles baby boutique Petit Tresor and a source says: “She and a female friend were looking at mostly pink onesies, pajamas and blankets. The kind of things you get when you first find out.” Additionally, Smith allegedly looked “very pregnant” during a recent visit to Myrtle Beach where she’s said to have rented a beachfront home.
“She was trying to conceal her stomach,” says the source. “[But] there was no doubt!” Also in Myrtle Beach, according to the tipster, is Birkhead. His mere presence would put the lie to reports that he’s going to make money and/or custody demands on Anna. But Birkhead has denied he’s the father of the denied baby. So, unless those denials are denied, nobody should have a problem.
I’m really hoping Anna Nicole Smith isn’t pregnant. Sure, she might inherit a bazillion dollars from the old dead guy she was humping, but all the money in the world can’t save an infant from being accidentally stuffed into the toaster because it resembled a giant loaf of cheese bread.
Saucie, you forgot Little Debbie and Baby Ruth.
And…
Twinkie
Frito Lay
Slim Jim
Spaghetti O
How about
Chalupa
Enchirito
Lil’ Smoky
Almond Joy
Chester Cheetah
Head Cheese
Teddy Graham
Maybe she is just constipated and she only THINKS she’s pregnant – maybe she could push out a big, brown turd and tape the event for her show and make a big dumb deal about her thinking it was going to be a baby – maybe Jessica Simpson could fill in as the midwife – I heard she has a lot of free time lately…
Big Mac
Whopper Jr.
Weight Watcher
Keebler Elf
Aha, then she could name it BOB! Get it, BOB??? bwahhaaa
Who knocked her up?
“You’re doing a terrific job, Brownie.”
Sniff?? What the fuck is that smell? Oh, it’s just “Bob” -
PUNCH THAT BITCH IN THE TAINT!
“Yo, hey Bob!!” Ya mudder’s a whore…”
“Yo Bob, ya piece o’ shit!”
Myrtle Beach? She’s losing hick cred. She should go to Panama City Beach, aka The Redneck Riviera.
#61 – Ya mudder’s a whore! Seriously, when is that NOT a good comeback? That right – NEVER!
Famous Amos
Chips Ahoy
Otis Spunkmeyer
Cool Ranch
Jello Pudding
Rice Crispy
Silly Putty
Bambi
Candi (or anything ending in “i”)
Number Two
Ultimate Bacon Cheeseburger
Xanex
Vicodin
Stupid Baby
This person is all gums… I can’t stand it. Kind of creepy….
also…
dinty moore
oscar mayer
mr. peanut
melba toast
chicken teriyaki
general mills
chef boy-ar-dee
ramen noodle
she’s got the teeth of mr.ed…
“awww commme onnn willllburrrr…”
#31 I think you may be right… What is she anyway? The thigh crack tickled every noodle in my head… fucking hysterical comment, thanks!
#64…
number two
stupid baby
…that fucking rocks…i’m crying…
When she had all her lipo and breast augmentations she should have had a freaking gumectomy. Dumb bloated bitch.
Charlie Tuna
Crackrock Slimjim if it’s a boy.
Heroin Moonpie if it’s a girl. (Personally, I’m pulling for Extasy Chocodile, but that’s a long shot.)
Slim chance of survival either way. Well, unless her older son takes care of it. He seems relatively squared away, all things considered.
Actually, Extasy Chocodile may have better odds than I first thought. It’s a solid stripper name, and if the whelp is a girl, there is a brass pole in her future. Probably in Tijuana.
if i were a lesbian i’d do her.
then again, if i was a goat i’d do a goat too.
brandi, you’re on fire…
between this and the kirsten dumb post, you’re blazin girl!!!
No to be outdone by Brangelina, she could travel to the Congo and give birth in a destitute village in a hut surrounded by hot, naked tribesmen while she gives out free samples of Trimspa to the village women while she has sex with the men, who probably have never seen such a fat, whiny, bloated, toxified creature that hasn’t emerged from the local swamp…all of this she could film for her show -
My horse makes that face after it eats a bag of cookies then makes itself puke.
#77
that also belongs on the nicole ritchie thread…
Gordon Fisherman
Pilsbury Dough Boy (for either boy or girl)
Hamburger Helper
Kool-Aid Man
Baby Back, Baby Back, Bacy Back Ribs
Willy Wonka
Bird’s Eye
Campbell’s Select
Jiffy Pop
Lick-m-ade
Dreamsicle
Squeeze Pop
Flavor Ice
AFLAC!!
#74 – Do you ever do it doggy-style? Hehehe
It will be hilarious if she gets her money from dead guy and then has to give some to this dude for getting her pregnant…..Kind of makes me want to sing some MJ……
“Anna are you ok, you ok, you ok Anna?”
“Anna are you ok, you ok, you ok Anna?”
“Anna are you ok, your pregnant, but your ok Anna”
“You’ve been struck by, you’ve been fucked by, a smooth criminal”
I forgot:
Burger King
and while I’m at it… Double Whopper
In keeping with the French theme of the day:
Royale Wit’ Cheese
OH GOD.
Who impregnated that? Who looked at her coked-out, trashy, drunk ass and thought, “I know where I wanna stick it,”
She looks like a Naked Mole Rat wearing a blond wig! And she has the intelligence of my right shoe. After a night of hard partying with the skanky high heels down the street.
Anna Nicole needs a new kid. Her son is 20 this year and kids around that age tend to move out. So she needs a new one to take care of her. Considering the fact that she probably has a negative IQ, I’m guessing her son has ran the household since he was 3 or 4
82 – I did it. Which is weird because I’m a female and not an acquaintance of David Crosby.
83
Francis Bean looks spookily just like Curt. Let’s hope that Courtney doesn’t get confused in one of her coke binges and kill her too.
….That mouth…it’s like she is toothless on top…but the huge bottom teeth moe then compensate…..Toothless Baaabeee…..
#82…
I think someone probably was giving it to her “in the back door” and it “slipped”. Maybe her scumbag attorney – he does’t look like he does much – does this mean she is going to sue the turkey baster for alimony??
I doubt this is her doing, but it seems I read somewhere that her son (named something normal, if I recall) was very level-headed, made good grades in school, etc. Maybe her next one will turn out okay,too. After all I was practically raised by wolves (wolves would’ve been better) and I’m ok.
As for being a golddigger, that old dirty lech she married got exactly what he paid for. She might be a golddigger, but she earned her money. Can you imagine having to sleep with that wizened old troll? GROSS.
Every time I see a pic of her, her gums get bigger and bigger. It’s like her teeth are sinking. Soon, her gums are gonna be so large, they’ll try and take over the world. RUN! IT’S ANNA’S GIANT GUMS! But then…*gasp* what’s this? It’s..it’s..it’s a GIANT CLITORIS (attached to lindsay hohan!)!! OMG the clitoris and gums are battling! As the battle goes on and we nervously await the outcome, we are shocked as a new mutant joins the battle. A giant alien thing in a purple one-piece, oozing crabs and slime! But what’s this? Before the purple mutant alien gets a chance to let out a herpes yell, a giant blob of blubber named Kirstie comes rolling into view. Not far behind, we see an ugly little man persuing her, screaming “Leeeeet me draw soommmmee blooodddd!! I wan to maaakkeee a peeeeccturee!”
Um…yeah. Sorry folks, I didn’t get much sleep last night.
For the baby’s sake, I hope it gags on Anna’s Trimspa filled placenta.
#88
I think that idiocy skips a generation….hence her first born is all cool and normal and in spite of the Trimspa chemicals the is spawn is absorbing will be normal and extremely toned….the only fetus with a six pack….but the gums….well we can only hope and pray…well in the case of the threads in this room…PREY….
I’d hit it.
…with little “Number Two”.
P.S.: #20: Fucking brilliant.
“Denying that you’re not pregnant” is a confirmation that you ARE pregnant. A double negative is a confirmation.
Maybe someone meant denying that she is pregnant. Who knows? Who cares?
Ahhhhh, Jacq. Fucking priceless. Just typing ‘Stupid Baby’ makes me laugh.
Number Two was number two on the list; double entendre, anyone? I bet she’d name it that because she’s either not sure which hole it came out of or because that’s how high she can count and it’s convenient that the Cletus-Fetus will be… number two!
/laughs quietly, maniacally, to self… stupid baby…
I am glad she is expecting! She deserves a baby! As far as what howard Stern is saying-well his track record isn’t too impressive! She has to do what a girl has to do!!!!
Can’t the world just be happy for Anna Nicole? I wish everyone would give her a break on the paternity issue. It’s her business anyways- and the poor mom just lost her son. I’m sure she wouldn’t mind some privacy in her life right now.