Anna Nicole Smith has pneumonia

November 1st, 2006 // 35 Comments

Anna Nicole Smith has been hospitalized with pneumonia at the same medical center where her 20-year-old son Daniel died. Her attorney says:

“She has a slight case of pneumonia. We’ve had a sudden change of weather here due to a cold snap. I didn’t gather it was anything serious.”

Pneumonia? Sure. Why not. She could walk out of that hospital with a peg leg and a Japanese husband and it’d be just another day in the life of Anna Nicole Smith.


  1. jrzmommy

    COLD WEATHER DOES NOT CAUSE PNEUMONIA! Is her attorney my fucking great grandmother with that shit?

  2. Here I come son!!!!!

  3. Ed Bambrick

    Some more zombie jokes would be great now.

    ANSLTC!

  4. serial snarkalec

    They say that pneumonia is like trying to breathe with bowling balls setting on your chest. Oh, wait …

  5. PrettyBaby

    Hey #1 Why aren’t you gloating with your top post??

  6. jrzmommy

    #5, idunno *shrugs shoulders*

  7. #5 – Because she’s been there before… as have I. Ha! Ha!

  8. Missallanpoe

    JRZ, *hands your banana laffy taffy*, anyway…Why do we care? I….don’t see the point in this story. =)

    PS: I hope she dies, we’d be better off

  9. Madrid Marriott

    Pneumonia is the least of her diseases that Anna Nicole has to worry about. But maybe we’ll see a bunch of people fight over who is the “father of her pneumonia.”

  10. jrzmommy

    *unwraps laffy taffy and woofs it down* #8, Anna Nicole is a piss poor excuse for a mother. What did she dress up as for Halloween? A gravedigger?! Ha ha ha *downs 5 Pixy Stix at once*

  11. The North Koreans are a bunch of poor faggots!

    http://news.yahoo.com/fc/world/north_korea

  12. touchyfeely

    well i guess we’ll all get to see whether or not she has any real grief, she’s on ET for the next few nights. supposedly we’ll feel sad briefly.

  13. #11

    “…”

    But yeah, only Anna Nicole Smith could create an offshoot STD from pneumonia.

    She’s the plague.

    http://chasingculture.com/liberty/index.php

  14. RichPort

    What other phantom diseases will she develop in an attempt to evade justice? Water in the knee? Hitting her funny bone? Crotch itch? Post nasal fucking drip? Toe fungus? Head On, apply directly to the fucking forehead? Send someone to dig up her son, throw her soon to be refatted ass in, then sit him on top of the mound of dirt in a lawn chair with a Mai Tai stapled to his hand.

  15. Anna Nicole has an attachment and personality disorder. Whenever things don’t go her way she will need to get sick (and may physically make herself so) in order to be rescued and get attention.

    http://www.holisticwisdom.com

  16. BigJim

    @11:

    I don’t have anything against faggots, but I sure as hell hate poor people. Almost as much as I hate fat people.

  17. jrzmommy

    This just in, Anna Nicole Smith suffering from Munchausen’s Syndrome by Proxy.

  18. RichPort

    Maybe they should give her some Welbutrin, since the commercial calmly boasts “if you take Welbutrin, you may have a seizure”.

    I love ads for new drugs… I’m off to get some Levitra right now and I don’t even know what the fuck it’s for…

  19. #19 – I hate slant-eyed people who have the Bomb!

  20. Will there be a day when there’s nothing wrong with her? I would actually like to hear it when she gets something right but I guess it won’t be as intersting as her messing everything up.

  21. I didn’t know that Pneumonia had replaced “Drug overdose” in newspaper reporting.

  22. commissioner

    Rich- You’ll throw a football straighter; this I know because I saw the commercial.

  23. commissioner

    #22

    I hate sheet-heads who have the bomb!

  24. She’s checking into the same medical center that oversaw the death of her son? Pneumonia? The big titted bitch has a death wish.

  25. Thanks fish for the props – I send you the link to this article before it ever hits your site, along with a bunch of shit about how the high temps in the Bahamas haven’t dropped below 80 all month. So you publish the article & don’t give any fucking credit to anyone? Change the line on your posting page to “I’ll publish your submission & no one will ever hear about who helped me the fuck out.” That’s more of the truth!

    BTW, TC&LRHLTC.

  26. HughJorganthethird

    I’d have thought the doctor’s would have been more worried about the fact she’s turning into that kid from “Mask”. 10 bucks says she starts hanging out with Cher and Sam Shaeppard alot.

  27. Giggles

    Right, one does not get pnemonia because the weather turns a little cold. Her lawyer thinks everybody is stupid. I’m so bored with Vicky and her posse.

  28. ponk

    she really needs bigger sunglasses.

  29. Missallanpoe

    Rofl, i literally laughed my ass off jrz..gravedigger..HA! Someone grab me some super glue >.> Anyway…*pours rootbeer flavored bottlecaps in my mouth* Does anyone notice she has a square face? Very…odd looking.

  30. biatcho

    I am going with that she has AIDS. Full blown AIDS, because she neglected to take the advice of our friends at The Onion, you know it’s a scientific fact that eating non-Brach’s candy corns will give you full blown AIDS. And will kill your children unexpectedly.

  31. Candy corn aside, I think Anna Nicole Smith is doing a fine job of killing her kids all on her own.

    http://chasingculture.com/liberty/index.php

  32. hope she gets better

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