Angelina Jolie’s dress suggests pregnantitis

January 28th, 2008 // 99 Comments

Angelina Jolie attended the 14th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards yesterday and her dress has stoked the rumor flames that she’s pregnant again. This poor woman can’t catch a break. So Angelina and Brad Pitt have a hundred kids (scientific estimate). That doesn’t mean she’s perpetually knocked up. She can’t even order a cheeseburger without someone saying “Angelina Jolie eats for two.” Can’t we just respect her as a human being by ogling her awesome rack? Hey, wait, Brad Pitt’s in these pictures, too. Get out. Was he there the whole time?

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Comments (99)

  1. Gerald_Tarrant | January 28, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    In the immortal words of Dice Clay:

    I know an old woman who lives in a shoe,
    she had so many kids,
    her uterus fell out.

    Reply
  2. Joe Melnick | January 28, 2008 at 12:48 pm

    She looks great, he looks ridiculous with that swept-around hairdo. And as always, he changes his look to complement the lady he’s with at the time.

    Reply
  3. F | January 28, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    She shouldn’t go around wearing a fucking sack then.

    Reply
  4. Johandi | January 28, 2008 at 12:49 pm

    What I wouldn’t give to suck on those massive mammories.

    Reply
  5. Nathan Sprinkle | January 28, 2008 at 12:51 pm

    If theres another kid thats hers… it will probably be locked in a closet with the other one. seeing as how its not forign and all. And was born into a life of privlage. UNLESS she had someone impregnate her from a third world country just so she could feel like this kid was worth it!

    Reply
  6. Snarf | January 28, 2008 at 12:55 pm

    Looks like she wrapped a sheet around herself.

    Reply
  7. digdug | January 28, 2008 at 12:58 pm

    I was wondering why A.J was ignoring my calls…..

    Reply
  8. Mo | January 28, 2008 at 12:58 pm

    Angelina has an awesome rack?!

    Reply
  9. minniememe | January 28, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    she usually looks great, but not with those JC Penney drapes engulfing her

    Reply
  10. Steve | January 28, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    She’s def. pregnant, look at her breasts. She’s the sexiest woman in the world.

    Reply
  11. SELL THAT PORCELAIN PUSSY | January 28, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    HER TITS ARE AS BIG AS MELONS. IT’S OBVIOUS SHE’S PREGNANT. POOR MADDOX. SO MANY YEARS OF HAVING HER TO HIMSELF AND NOW HE CAN’T EVEN BLINK WITHOUT ANOTHER BRAT MOVING IN ON HIS TURF.

    Reply
  12. Dick Richards (Sloth.) | January 28, 2008 at 1:02 pm

    God. Someone steal her ovaries in the night. Please?

    What a ridiculous family: an asian, a couple of black kids, a blonde headed nightmare, and who knows what else.

    Reply
  13. stinky pants | January 28, 2008 at 1:04 pm

    #12

    there is only one black kid. there are two asians and shiloh. get it right, bitch.

    Reply
  14. mamadough | January 28, 2008 at 1:05 pm

    she’s a pretentious bitch and brad is a spineless pussy. when did he stop being a man? sometimes a woman needs a man instead of another vagina standing around.

    p.s. anyone can throw doughnuts (play horseshoe) at little ethiopian heads…

    Reply
  15. stinky pants | January 28, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    #12

    there is only one black kid. there are two asians and shiloh. get it right, bitch.

    Reply
  16. anita | January 28, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    I think they look so happy together how can anyone not feel happy for them!!!!

    Reply
  17. So | January 28, 2008 at 1:06 pm

    If someone with money, looks, and fame wants to have a bunch of kids, I say go for it. Think of how lucky their kids are compared to Brit Brit’s poor two-some.

    Reply
  18. edamame | January 28, 2008 at 1:07 pm

    Congrats to the and their family!
    Damn, I’d be ALL OVER Brad…day and night. He’d have to ice his junk down when I was finished with him.

    Ugly ass dress, though.

    I’m glad she’s eating again.

    Reply
  19. edamame | January 28, 2008 at 1:07 pm

    Congrats to them and their family!
    Damn, I’d be ALL OVER Brad…day and night. He’d have to ice his junk down when I was finished with him.

    Ugly ass dress, though.

    I’m glad she’s eating again.

    Reply
  20. maniston suicide in 5...4....3....2..... | January 28, 2008 at 1:10 pm

    #14

    look here jennifer maniston, your lonely ass needs to quit yer bitchin. angie has exactly what angie wants and brad is happy to do whatever he can to recline in the rays of her light. your stank ass is just mad cause you don’t have it like that.

    Reply
  21. Tracy | January 28, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    She needs to quit raiding J Lo’s closet.

    Reply
  22. edamame | January 28, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    Sorry about the double post…I was trying to correct an error!

    She’ll have to retire those leather pants for awhile.

    Reply
  23. feckless | January 28, 2008 at 1:14 pm

    Officially leaving the break-up rumors and starting in with the bitching about how many kids they have. Plan is to start back on the break-up predictions in 7 months.

    Nice rack.

    Reply
  24. kitty_kat | January 28, 2008 at 1:15 pm

    There are pregnancy rumours about Angelina Jolie? Wow. I didn’t even know people still cared about these two. Something about them seems too fake for me. Even when you see them at red carpet events, it looks as if they’re only together for the cameras.

    Reply
  25. Rufus | January 28, 2008 at 1:18 pm

    What is it with Holywood and defective rubbers?

    Reply
  26. mamadough | January 28, 2008 at 1:19 pm

    20, oh im sorry, i wasn’t aware that you were too busy licking her butthole to see things for how they are. you’re best coarse of action would be to stick your head in an oven.

    Reply
  27. mamadough | January 28, 2008 at 1:24 pm

    *your. fuck! fucking proper grammar and shit.

    Reply
  28. LadyJane | January 28, 2008 at 1:25 pm

    Brad’s Penis? I’d like you meet my vagina….

    Reply
  29. Erica | January 28, 2008 at 1:27 pm

    Look at her! Shes glowing!
    And she looks much healthier now then she has recently.
    I’m happy for them. They’re cute together.

    Reply
  30. maniston suicide in 5...4....3....2..... | January 28, 2008 at 1:28 pm

    #27

    i always suspected that you were an idiot. thanks for the confirmation :)

    Reply
  31. LadyJane | January 28, 2008 at 1:29 pm

    Brad’s tongue? I’d like you to meet my clitoris…

    Reply
  32. LadyJane | January 28, 2008 at 1:31 pm

    Brad’s fist? I’d like you to meet my asshole.

    Reply
  33. Me | January 28, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    Beautiful Jolie! I do like this couple a lot.

    Reply
  34. Me | January 28, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    Beautiful Jolie! I do like this couple a lot.

    Reply
  35. LadyJane | January 28, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    Brad’s chin? I’d like you to meet my taint.

    Reply
  36. Jimbo | January 28, 2008 at 1:33 pm

    You are kind of nasty Lady Jane!!

    Reply
  37. D. Richards (Bitch.) | January 28, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    Wow! #13, You win! You know the hyphenated Pitt-Jolie family! You follow their every move and are offended when people get their obtuse family wrong. Intense! Your prize: nothing.

    If only I could be as cool as you — but I can’t — not at least until I start reading People magazine; no, never. I’m still proud of you though, lover.

    Reply
  38. Gerald_Tarrant | January 28, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    I saw both of their profiles on some dating site. A spambot will be along soon to post the exact link.

    Reply
  39. mamadough | January 28, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    brad’s just another submissive accessory, like a purse or an asshole pleasuring device for ladyjane…

    Reply
  40. LadyJane | January 28, 2008 at 1:35 pm

    Thanks, Jimbo. *blushes*

    Reply
  41. Auto-Erotic-Asphixiation | January 28, 2008 at 1:38 pm

    #12 (sloth) What the hell does it matter to YOU who or even WHAT is in her family tree?
    You make the sounds of a jealous man because Brad Pitt is hitting that and you’re not
    Get over yourself

    Reply
  42. Brangeloom | January 28, 2008 at 1:42 pm

    #20:

    You’re an imbecile. Get over your biazrro sadist delusions that Aniston is “suffering” or whatever similar weirdo thoughts you have.

    Brad has proven himself to the world to be a cheating, lying, mid-life crisis casualty, and now he probably has the herp and whatever other diseases he caught from Holie. Who would want him back? XD

    Reply
  43. Jimbo | January 28, 2008 at 1:43 pm

    Lady Jane, Is that your foot in the pictures on your web page? I am always up for a good time, but ouch!!!

    Reply
  44. maniston suicide in 5...4....3....2..... | January 28, 2008 at 1:45 pm

    It turns me on soooo much to delude myself into thinking a woman is suffering because her husband ran off with some whore. I hope the same thing happens to me some day!

    Reply
  45. Anonymous | January 28, 2008 at 1:45 pm

    They are trying to create their own city.

    Jolie sucks. Total bitch. You couldn’t pay me enough to have anything to do with her.

    Reply
  46. Jimbo | January 28, 2008 at 1:52 pm

    Lady Jane!! Keep in mind, my penis wouldn’t be hard on. Unless yous have pictures of Brad for me to being google at.

    Reply
  47. RichPort | January 28, 2008 at 1:54 pm

    Pregnant or not, I’d introduce her to the ol’ zipper dragon, smack her in the face a few times, then stick it in her bum. And that’s just after meeting in a public place.

    Reply
  48. Katie | January 28, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    Ugh – what the hell is up with the pubic hair on Pitt’s face? Do these actors think it is witty to grow tons of hair on their face just because of the writer’s strike? Like “Ooooh, look at me, I am without a job because of this strike but I LOVE these writers so I am going to show my undying support by growing lots of facial hair. Because, you know, if you’re on strike you don’t shave your face. Because you’re just laying around and shit. haha get the joke?” It is just lame. And if these writers never go off of strike, I won’t give a rat’s ass. It is almost comical to see how seriously these ass clowns take themselves – like the world will fall off its axis if there is no longer inane sitcoms or stupid action movies.

    As far as Ang-vagina goes, who cares if she pops another Pitt spawn out of her crotch? She won’t treat it as well as her little ugly Ubange daughter or those cross-eyed Asian sons. The kid would be probably be relegated to the backyard with her other ACTUAL child, poor little Shamu, or whatever her name is.

    Reply
  49. Jimbo | January 28, 2008 at 2:00 pm

    @46 You so funny troll. Where have you been? I have not seen you around in a few days? Did you mom take away your key board?

    Reply
  50. Raquel | January 28, 2008 at 2:09 pm

    They need to dip this one in ink when it’s born, to give it a fighting chance. Maybe not feed it for a couple days and throw it in a mudhole, then Angelina can save it while a group of savages in loin cloths jump around and shout in some monkeychatter language. Bonding is crucial. Otherwise, you know, if it’s a Caucasian biological child of hers, it’s just a blob. Might as well take home the placenta instead.

    Reply

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