Angelina Jolie has something in her belly

February 25th, 2008 // 103 Comments

Alright, let’s get into the insanity that was this weekend. Before we jump into the Oscar aftermath, the Independent Spirit Awards also went down. They’re kind of like the Oscars but everyone stands around talking about their odorless bowel movements. I’m telling you, it’s a miracle of science. Anyway, Angelina Jolie picked the Spirit Awards as the venue to show off her protruding stomach. I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure that’s a baby in there. By my calculations there’ll be roughly two Pitt-Jolies to every one Normie (that’s us) by 2030. As long as the females look like Angelina, I embrace this future. I will also simultaneously unembrace pants.

Photos: Getty Images
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  1. First

    first

  2. brennie

    Wow, I’ve never cared about Brad Pitt one way or the other, but he truly looks like puffy hell in these pics.

  3. Frank Lucas' Bitch

    Wow. I was waiting for them at the red carpet and they were at Independent Awards crap? Wow… but maybe they finally realized that Academy is real crap most of the time (Shakespeare in Love *cough*cough*)

    Ooh, she’s pregnant!

  4. Quinn

    Hubby is getting jelouse and must gain weight too!!!

  5. Carpediem

    Can she be MORE fucking beautiful please? Jesus! I can’t look at her anymore!

  6. Jennifer2

    She was said to be fond of internet recently. Some of her fans found her on a millionaire&celebs club ‘BillionaireCupid dot com’. She has a personal account there with her pictures, blog…In her friend circle, some other stars can be found there.

  7. OW

    4- is that like french lice?

  8. digdug

    Someone might want to check that right arm and see if it is still alive…

  9. sara

    Brad looks like a cross between Bono and my grandfather wearing his leftover clothes from the ’70s. They’re becoming a little too parent-y.

  10. PootyPants

    Why does Brad wear a wig now? He looks like hell.

    Angie is a great mom . . . every pregnant woman should take a quick trip to Iraq to an area so dangerous they need to wear a bullet proof vest. Way to think about your unborn child, Angie, not to mention your multi-cultural brood back home.

  11. Carpediem

    @6- I’ve think I’ve seen you before. It was on ImADirtyTwat.com. You have a personal account there with pictures of your fat ass, your friend circle (which is empty) along with some other people that can be found there who have no life and have nothing better to do than to sit on they’re asses eating cheetos and pork rinds while they advertise a lame ass site.

  12. Whaaaat?? Angelina is pregnant? This is brand new news that I haven’t heard before! Way to be on top of things there, Fish..

  13. Last night I had anal sex with a guy who has Tourette’s, but I don’t think it was intentional.

  14. Oh, and I agree, Brad Pitt looks like SHIT (hey that rhymes). What the FRICK is up with those old man pants? I see those all the time at thrift stores, they make great skate rags when you cut them off..

  15. Anal Fistula

    “I will also simultaneously unembrace pants”…brilliant, fish

    angelina is, of course, hot as hell. but she is also getting a bit skeletor-ish…look at her lower arms. i liked her back in the “Gio” days more.

  16. @13, greeeaaaattt, it’s going to be one of THOSE days…..

    Fuck it, I’m outta here..

  17. I know those pictures are real, but it just looks so fake (i.e., photoshop). I’m happy for them! At least they can take care of the children, instead of popping them out and ignoring their existence (Britney).

  18. Is that Val Kilmer she’s dating now???

    http://www.cafepress.com/teepod

  19. Gus

    I like Brad’s outfit; I dress in a similar way. I wear better shoes and more modern jackets, however.

  20. What Happend to Him

    Why does Brad look like a sleazy used car salesman. What happened to him. I’m sure he thinks that he looks like Steve McQueen, but he really looks like he is wearing a very bad Halloween costume.

  21. Gus

    I’m actually chuckling at some of the comments made about his pants. Pants like that are common in high-fashion menswear collections. Stick with your Juicy Couture and me and Brad’ll carry on wearing Tom Ford.

  22. Auntie Kryst

    Angelina looks great as always, but what is with the baby bump? It looks kinda pointy. Is she carrying a conehead?

  23. FL Cracker

    Robert Redford called – He wants his hair back……..

  24. PrettyBaby

    Well, there will at least be someone to be a companion for Shiloh while the rest of them go out for photo opps… ahem, er I mean political statements, uh, scratch that, I meant to say outings with the adopted brood.

  25. sidv

    Is Angelina dating Charles Bronson now?

  26. Ript1&0

    Dude, I’m not wearing pants either. Wanna make out?

  27. Gerald_Tarrant

    Brad isn’t aging all that well. And for shit’s sake, if you tuck in your shirt wear a fucking belt. You look like an ear biter who needs a helmet to walk without the belt.

  28. BillionaireCupid

    Let me intorduce myself…

    I am BillionaireCupid and I am an IDIOT!

    All the people on my website have herpes!

  29. cb

    She’s wearing high heels and her arms are still longer than her legs. She must be really good on monkey bars.

  30. fergernauster

    Hey-ho, everyone.

    Hope y’all had a GREAT weekend…(???)

    Ang looks HOT with her newly darkened tresses. As if she could BE any hotter…

  31. April

    ewwwwww…… what happened to Brad? How did he get my grandpa’s pants? I swear he had them yesterday!

  32. chris

    #21 – Are these pants from the Tom Ford retirement home Spring collection. I remember when high fashion designers were showing tube tops for men on the runways of Paris. I didn’t buy one of those either.

  33. Jesus Christ, that's hot

    Oh FUCK, she’s insanely fucking incredibly HOT!!
    HOT HOT HOT
    Hottest woman in Hollywood BY FAR.
    No one can compare. She may be the only actress in Hollywood who is actually naturally truly STUNNING.

  34. nits

    My grandpa called me this morning bitchen about someone stealing his favorite pants and I thought he was going thru dementia again. Brad, honey, just give him the damn pants back pllllleeease!

  35. WOW

    Wow, Angelina is looking HOT and STUNNING to jaw-dropping and dick-exploding levels, and she’s pregnant.
    She looks so much better as a brunnette like now.

  36. bunny

    She is so pretty but that hand….something I only see in my nightmares……

  37. D. Richards (Saint.)

    Let it be known that Dicks Dicks thinks the world revolves around Angelina Jolie: she’s Dick’s sun and the universe is her earth. Everything is her satellite. Angelina is life giver. Dicks is amazed by the reproduction cycle. He knows in his black, but warming heart that Angelina is better at being pregnant than any other woman on this planet, ever — was. She’s mother genius (to the stars; the moon; Xenu).

    Jolie (brother fucker) is doing the world a favor by having kids. God knows we need more of ‘em. Hallelujah.

  38. ya mama

    with all those kids, he can’t afford to leave her. the child support alone will ruin him. great thinking, angie.

  39. God Angelina is fucking HOT

    C’mon, Brad Pitt is fucking Tyler Durden and the best looking male in Hollywood by far, give him a break if he’s not looking perfect all the time.
    And oh yeah, don’t forget, his girlfriend is the fucking hottest and fucking most beautiful and stunning woman in Hollywood by far.

    Jealous anyone?

  40. jrz

    February 22, 2008
    Dear Diary:
    Went to some award thing or another. Talked Brad into wearing the absolute goofiest outfit ever. God he has no balls. Jennifer ought to go out of her mind at these pictures of me pregnant again. I hope this one is foreign.
    –A

  41. CS

    Talk about dick sucking lips…!

  42. Janine

    Why is that just a few years ago she was going on about how she would not have a biological child, because she feels like then their would be that one child that doesn’t get adopted, and there already is an overpopulation problem? I guess Brad wants more biological kids.
    To: Jesus christ, that’s hot # 33
    By the way, Angelina is NOT ‘natural’ at all, go on to goodplasticsurgery.com, she has definitely had a nose job, her lower lip reduced, and probably cheek implants. Her surgeon did a good job though, and she is really pretty.
    http://www.goodplasticsurgery.com/angelina_jolie.htm

  43. Frank Lucas' Bitch

    Angie’s so beautiful though. But way tooooo skinny! Honestly, how much does she weigh? Under 75 lbs?
    But yeah…never liked Brad but he’s fucking Tyler Durden so fuck how he looks now, he’s still Tyler Durden. It’s true though that he looks like a drugged out used-car salesman. Colin Farrell and Robert Downey Jr. beat him by far now.

  44. kitty_kat

    @32- They even have stilettos for men.
    Aneglina looks much better than she did before… But they’re both past their primes in terms of looks. Johnny Depp and Catherine Zeta-Jones are much better looking if you ask me.

  45. kitty_kat

    @32- They even have stilettos for men.
    Aneglina looks much better than she did before… But they’re both past their primes in terms of looks. Johnny Depp and Catherine Zeta-Jones are much better looking if you ask me.

  46. sla

    I’ve never been prone to celebrity envy, but Angie is starting to get to me. I am sick of her perfect family, her perfect political statements, her perfect hair, her perfect makeup, her perfect body, her perfect husband, and most of all, that GOD DAMNED LOOK OF SERENITY SHE HAS ON HER FACE ALL THE GOD DAMNED TIME NOW. Maybe it’s that glow of pregnancy.

    I hope she gets raging, raging, hemorrhoids, ginormous stretch marks and a thrashed perineum.

  47. kitty_kat

    *Angelina

  48. sam80

    #33 – Granted, Hollywood is not exactly overflowing with beauty nowadays, but lets not get carried away. She had a nose job and has one of the worst proportioned bodies.

  49. Margeaux

    What the hell is Brad Pitt wearing? He looks like he’s straight out of the 70′s. Puke.

  50. D. Richards

    #13! Frist, you allowed yourself to be sodomized by a freak but didn’t call me?!

    Shame. . .

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