Angelina Jolie confirmed today that she is definitely sporting double fetuseses. She had no choice in the matter after Jack Black accidentally spilled the beans then sang a goofy song with his guitar. Us Magazine reports:
Jolie confirmed the news that has long been rumored: she and beau Brad Pitt are expecting twins. Her Kung Fu Panda co-star Jack Black let the news slip during an interview about the movie that took place this afternoon at the Cannes Film Festival in France.
For those keeping score at home, this brings the Pitt-Jolie’s one baby closer to TOTAL WORLD DOMINATION. Better start brushing up on your Pitt-Jolie-ese. Feel free to practice by translating the following examples. (Hint: Don’t forget to conjugate the verbs.):
1. Baby uterus adopt the ridiculously good looking with the procreate.
2. Monster boobs!
3. Charity UN the fallopian tube Brad pecs.
4. What the fuck happened to Ed Norton’s career?
Answer Key: 1. Please put mustard on my sandwich. 2. Hello! (Formal.) 3. The bathroom is the second door to the left. 4. What the fuck happened to Ed Norton’s career?
Randal | May 14, 2008 at 3:37 pm
Twins? WOW! Congratulations Angelina and of course, Brad.
The two of you will produce the most beautiful looking twins and of course, with you being the mother Angelina, you’ll raise them to be well respected and loved.
Once again, congratulations to you and your GROWING family.
Randal
SCBC | May 14, 2008 at 3:38 pm
I can’t be FIRST! I’ve never posted here.
Jimbo | May 14, 2008 at 3:39 pm
First you slutty junk suckin blatter infections!
awww | May 14, 2008 at 3:42 pm
Not gonna lie…they make gorgeous babies…
Zig | May 14, 2008 at 3:44 pm
Angie – congrats on the double-blobs.
veggi | May 14, 2008 at 3:46 pm
So….Shiloh’s dad is Donald Duck???
FRIST!!! | May 14, 2008 at 3:48 pm
At least she makes the n igger baby walk.
andie | May 14, 2008 at 3:49 pm
That little girl looks just like her daddy.
Cute cute.
I wonder how her figure will bounce back. There are some things you just can’t come back from. I wonder what miracle product she’s using to prevent stretch marks.
JLo was never rail thin to begin with, so her skin probably didn’t suffer much, but when really tiny women have their bellies stretched out with two babies, it ain’t usually pretty in the aftermath.
Then again some women are just incredibly lucky and never get stretch marks at all.
KLo | May 14, 2008 at 3:51 pm
this is old news. fuck this website
KLo | May 14, 2008 at 3:51 pm
this is old news. fuck this website
Jrz | May 14, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Why’s she got white tights and long sleeves on the black kid, but no tights and sleevless on the white kid? Mmm hmmm…….so it’s like that, is it?
ed. | May 14, 2008 at 3:52 pm
“That little girl’s blank look is just like her daddy’s. ”
fixed
On A Related Note | May 14, 2008 at 3:54 pm
Republicans Say House Loss May Signal More Setbacks
May 14 (Bloomberg) — U.S. House Republicans said an election loss in Mississippi yesterday may portend widespread voter rejection in the November races, and some complained that party leaders are failing to provide an adequate election-year strategy and agenda.
At a closed-door weekly meeting of all House Republicans today, Representative Tom Davis of Virginia distributed a 20-page assessment of the party’s prospects, telling reporters later that it warned that following the “same-old, same-old is a 25-seat loss.”
Republicans are increasingly concerned about their election prospects after Democrat Travis Childers yesterday won a Mississippi House seat that Republicans had held for more than 13 years, the third time since March that a Democrat won a Republican-held seat in a special election.
sportsdvl | May 14, 2008 at 4:00 pm
Can these two stop procreating for an instant!
#1 – seriously, are you gay?
#2 & 3 – you guys are douche bags.
#9 & 10 – then go to a different site you tool.
LeFarge | May 14, 2008 at 4:01 pm
How many kids will that make for them? 2 dozen?
snarky | May 14, 2008 at 4:03 pm
I never thought Brad Pitt was as hot as everyone said, but I gotta admit his little girl looks just like him & is adorable; & she really did inherit the world famous lips. I guess that was bound to happen considering both Pitt & Jolie have big,full lips. It will be interesting to see what Shiloh looks like when she’s older, and what the “twins” will look like. It almost doesn’t seem fair, how many damn blessings can one person have? Looks, money, beautiful children; sigh.
Rick | May 14, 2008 at 4:06 pm
Angelina Jolie is the most beautiful woman alive.
God she is amazing.
she's soooo hot | May 14, 2008 at 4:07 pm
She’s the hottest woman in the world, even super pregnant with twins, she looks stunning and fucking hot.
FRIST!!! | May 14, 2008 at 4:12 pm
LMAO at #12
#7 needs to get out more..
I think that makes five, right? Enough for a Partridge Family, just need a hideous looking bus..
Elliot_Spitz_On_Her | May 14, 2008 at 4:13 pm
I wouldn’t mind babysitting the twins under her morbid frock.
redsonja1313 | May 14, 2008 at 4:21 pm
WOW, Shiloh is unbelievably beautiful…. guessing their will be some serious sibling rivalry as they get older
Yeast | May 14, 2008 at 4:23 pm
SHILOHS TWIN CAN BE VIEWED BY COPYING PASTING THE FOLLOWING LINK
http://tweetybird419.tripod.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/tweetybird.jpg
shortie | May 14, 2008 at 4:27 pm
Holy Lord! Has anyone not noticed the gigantic fucking monster veins sticking out of her arms?!
Auntie Kryst | May 14, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Twins via natural childbirth, really?? They already have a white one. How do they expect to complete their living Benneton ad? They are still short an eskimo and a Samoan.
Laura | May 14, 2008 at 4:28 pm
Angie you are my favorite since day one first for being for being you and now for everything that you have done including changing your life around for your children with Maddox and know your whole gang lots of blessing
Randal | May 14, 2008 at 4:30 pm
I see my troll is back and he’s (she’s) praising this lardy lump of lady like a queen. The only queen here is my flaming trollish alter-ego.
Angelina Jolie and her overinflated milk rack is as attractive as a Hooters Restaurant: Nothing but udders wall-to-wall.
Everyone knows that beauty was defined by the sleek lines of Twiggy, Judy Carne, Shelley Duvall, Karen Carpenter and Christy Henrich (those last two knew the real value of staying thin.)
Meat is murder, bones for the boning.
Randal
Angela | May 14, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Yeah, I dunno. Shiloh’s features are striking, individually, but if you look through all the pics (not just the first) she’s got the potential for a weird overall face shape. Certainly nothing like Rumer Willis, but it’s again something about the jawline. It’s not uncommon for striking features to fit best on the parent’s separate faces but not look quite right when combined on their kid’s face.
ahof | May 14, 2008 at 4:36 pm
They’re up to SEVEN now, not five (once the twins are born).
Kim Lard-ass-ian | May 14, 2008 at 4:38 pm
This is one cute kid, isnt that enough though?? The overloaded planet we are grwoing on is being over populated enough by Africans, Asians and South Americans why not adopt a few more of them than placing an even bigger Hollyweird burden on the environment.
Kim Lard-ass-ian | May 14, 2008 at 4:38 pm
This is one cute kid, isnt that enough though?? The overloaded planet we are grwoing on is being over populated enough by Africans, Asians and South Americans why not adopt a few more of them than placing an even bigger Hollyweird burden on the environment.
Jen 4EVA | May 14, 2008 at 4:39 pm
When will Angelina admit she stole the twins from Jennifer?
Lola | May 14, 2008 at 4:40 pm
That looks like Gwyneths baby..
(joke)
Lola1 | May 14, 2008 at 4:40 pm
That looks like Gwyneths baby..
(joke)
Lola1 | May 14, 2008 at 4:40 pm
That looks like Gwyneths baby..
(joke)
veggi | May 14, 2008 at 4:41 pm
I agree with #29/30. Somebody should jump Angelina and beat her stomach with a baseball bat until the twins abort. It’s long overdue to make the planet’s wellbeing our first priority.
Plastic Hollywood | May 14, 2008 at 4:44 pm
Newsflash: Shiloh already is getting lip treatments, here’s the proof. How fucked up is that?
Famous Plastic | May 14, 2008 at 4:44 pm
6 kids? Good god, someone get that women into obsessive mothers anonymous. They should at least space the kids out so they can all get an equal share of attention from the parents (hiring more nanny’s doesn’t really cut it).
math | May 14, 2008 at 4:44 pm
28, no they’ll be up to 6 with the twins.
FRIST!!! | May 14, 2008 at 4:48 pm
Ok fine, not a Partridge family, more like the Brady Bunch
Whatever, they all sucked..
kim | May 14, 2008 at 4:49 pm
What the fuck is with her hands! They look like they are off of an 80 year old woman not a 32 year old. That is just gross!
eastcoastgirl | May 14, 2008 at 5:18 pm
There is no doubt that Shiloh is a beautiful child. I’ll bet the twins were concieved through IVF. Alot of stars are doing that now. I am sure they will be just as pretty. I just hope that Angelina’s fragile psyche holds up when all those kids get older.
Quinn | May 14, 2008 at 5:19 pm
Who the hell dresses little girls in all black!!
FRIST!!! | May 14, 2008 at 5:42 pm
It’s good to be prepared for a funeral
dogonabone | May 14, 2008 at 6:10 pm
those ‘mommy and me’ outfits suck
layla | May 14, 2008 at 6:27 pm
Her kids are SO cute and she looks incredible as always.
Woot | May 14, 2008 at 7:30 pm
I don’t think they got IVF, b/c if they were having problems conceiving, they’d probably just adopt. Plus, she’s still young and they’ve already had one kid. No, Angie’s just incredibly fertile and Brad has some feisty little swimmers.
what now? | May 14, 2008 at 7:40 pm
And what is her forehead having? Triplets. I realy don’t understand why Brad isn’t the pregnant one, like that dude on Oprah, I mean he’s the bitch in the relationship.. oh wait, that’s a different kind of bitch, he has an emotional vagina not a physical one. Well this twin thing sure spead up the process; they want three of a kind you know.
Shiloh has a cute face from the nose down, but her eyes and forehead are very downsyndromish, poor thing she got Brad’s squinty man eyes and Mommy forehead. BOOOO!
You know it’s great when kids are being cared for even if it’s by nannies, it’s better than an orphanage, but there is something so bizarre and unhealthy about the spead and hobby like nature at which they are collecting, I mean building, this family and the nomadic lifestyle they lead is quite unstable. I wonder how it will all turn out and what a mess it will be if they split up, but they probably never will just to piss off the lunatic anniston fans. When most parents try to stay together for the kids, it’s a couple kids that they have to worry about, but in this case they will have to stay together for a school of children that are mostly adopted so that’s a lot of divorce guilt right there. Maybe their next hobby wil be giving away children.
It takes a lot of ego to think that as two pampered celebrities you are qualified to raise a village, I always thought it took a village to raise two pampered celebrities. Well anyway I gotta say this is is the best moive Brad and Angie have ever made, really. I didn’t know what I wanted to watch, but this one was playing so I gave it a chance and boy am I glad I did, there isn’t one dull moment and it’s just full of surprises.
In the end though we will all see the credits roll and it will say all 300 kids were harmed in the making of this movie.
elle | May 14, 2008 at 8:02 pm
Can we say fertility treatments? Isn’t it funny how all of these stars nowadays are having twins? IVF!
damn, she's hot | May 14, 2008 at 8:04 pm
WHAT A B-E-A-U-T-Y. Just, stunning.
Crystal | May 14, 2008 at 8:28 pm
that monkey black thing is FUGLY. its gonna beat up the beautiful blonde child. GET THAT THING BACK TO AFRICA, good god its scaring the children! wat a fugly monkey!