Angelina Jolie collapses

January 18th, 2006 // 28 Comments

jolie-collapses.jpgStar magazine is reporting that while in the Domincan Republic shooting The Good Shepherd, 5-month pregnant Angelina Jolie collapsed and “gashed her head.” Brad Pitt became extremely nervous, and their source says: “She

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  1. HollyJ

    Pregnant women faint all the time. The only two times in my life I ever fainted was during pregnancy, and the OB was all “No biggee…happens frequently…”

    They make Brad sound like a nervous hen. Why not just cut his scrote off right now and put him in a white 50s nursing dress?

  2. SuperSpence

    Pretty hard to believe that a woman who has killed and eaten no less than twelve strong young men during sex would be knocked on her ass by an unborn child. The only rational conclusion to draw is that the Pitt and Jolie DNA have combined to create some sort of super-fetus, capable of putting a whup-ass on a woman most biologists had previously regarded as impervious to all forms of weaponry. Clearly, it is only a matter of time before this new species of human subdues all the nations of the world and rules us all, like the tyrannical pharoahs of old.

  3. Jayne

    “She

  4. Larry

    Check out that picture of Angelina in the cover of that mag. She really needs to lay off the pasta — she’s actually getting a big belly. Amazing, as she’s never let herself go like that before.

  5. Larry

    Oh, it’a also great to see the way the Star likes to watch Jennifer Anniston squirm. I knew there was something about that piece-of-garbage rag that I liked.

  6. SuperSpence

    3. Posted by Jayne
    I’m concerned over Brit’s headline..
    She’s gained more than 20 lbs???

    REPLY: That was inevitable once Frito-Lay started deep-frying Cheetohs in pork fat.

  7. Larry

    Britney will soon have to change her name to Britney Orb.

  8. MandySmurf

    Come on, that’s not even headline-worthy. Angelina collapsed, I’m sure she had morning sickness too. Maybe even some stretch marks. I’m sure Star’s just running out of shocking stories. If it weren’t for Brangelina, Star would have to result in using Britney’s “shocking” 20 pound fiasco as a story. Everyone saw that trainwreck before the pregnancy headlines were printed.

  9. That doesn’t even look real after magnifying that star cover in flash. I believe Angelina carried on, yes. How could she not after being bowed to on Sunday or Monday from an entire culture? No wonder she went up there.

    She needs power 24/7. What better way to feel like a God and walk around a 3rd world country, rich, hot and be able to spit on them and they would still feel blessed? Regardless that she adopts. She is a smart woman.

    Subliminal really. Brad Pitt is in for the ride of his life. I forgot, he already got that and she biologically has one in the oven now.

  10. Remeber that Star was the Magazine that came out with the cover story of how Jessica Simpson was going to have a baby to try to save her marraige on the SAME DAY that their publicists announced they were getting a divorce LOL

  11. HeeHaw

    “Remeber that Star was the Magazine that came out with the cover story of how Jessica Simpson was going to have a baby to try to save her marraige on the SAME DAY that their publicists announced they were getting a divorce”…….

    And the same magazine with a headline that screamed that Brad and Jen were getting back together…the same week they jointly announced their separation. Gotta love Star.

  12. OhAySis

    Mmmm…Angelina….gash(ed).

  13. ohyeah

    Maybe she shouldn’t be flaunting around third world countries when she’s pregnant. Karma… hmmm… yeah, shouldn’t be a sluty whore either…

  14. If any of you jerks had ever bothered to watch your movies, then you’d know she’s not really pregnant; she’s just wearing a fake belly, so that she can lure Ethan Hawke into her trap and kill him.

  15. Larry

    “Maybe she shouldn’t be flaunting around third world countries when she’s pregnant. Karma… hmmm… ”

    Yeah, that’s right! Karma!

    “yeah, shouldn’t be a sluty whore either… ”

    Well, hold on, let’s not go overboard.

  16. tess

    If I was Angelina, I would just take a break. I mean, why can’t she just go gome, eat Cheetos, Twizzlers, pizzas and ice-cream all day (aka the Britney diet), watch some TV, rent some DVD’s, go for a spa treatment etc.
    I’m not even surprised that she fainted. I mean, what was she thinking, going on a Third World Tour when she should just rest and be lazy 24/7. Poor brad, he must be crossing his fingers right now, hoping for this pregnancy to go well.

  17. Binky

    I’d faint too if Brad was wearing that weird hat around the house. Where were they headed ? The Wailling Wall ?

  18. remy

    haha Praz I was just thinking that. it’s a fake belly and somebody’s going to end up stabbed and maybe shot a few times. and I have a feeling it’s probably going to be jen if she doesn’t stfu about how well she’s doing without him.

    and just like in the movie, brad adopts the same interests and appearance as his, um, victims. he colors his hair the same exact shade as every woman he dates. I saw it in cosmo.

    RUN ANGIE RUN

  19. SMF121490

    Fainting during pregnancy is normal. No reason to get over excited. Unless, her doctor has informed of something the rest of the world doesn’t know YET.

  20. hafaball

    who the hell says gaunt? anyway, i think jennifer aniston maybe shot a needle out of a blow gun and it had some poison in it. not deadly poison, but enough to make her gaunt…damn it

  21. amma

    Fainting when you’re pregnant isn’t a good sign. It happens, but usually for not good reasons and not usually to healthy pregnant women.
    I am completely neutral and bored by the whole Brad/Angelina/Jennifer thing…I’m not on anyone’s side and hope they all end up happy.
    But, it does seem kind of selfish to be pregnant and hanging around 3rd world countries.I mean, for the sake of their child, she shouldn’t be anywhere that 90% of the population hasn’t had a TB shot…and that is just for starters.

  22. slinkhard

    ‘But, it does seem kind of selfish to be pregnant and hanging around 3rd world countries.’

    That, and if you’re told to go on bedrest that early on in the pregnancy, maybe you, um…should. Like it’s worth risking your health for what will undoubtedly be a shitty movie.

  23. julema

    Anything to sell magazines…Stupid! Who is stupid enough to believe all those magazine!? ANd people who say: if i was Angelina…She should not..she should do…
    Brad and Angelina don’t care about what people thinks… They are old enough to know what to do! they are in love, they will have a beautiful baby period. and everybody will continue say shit till it happen.

  24. Is this the same magazine that claimed Jennifer Aniston was going to crash Brangelina’s wedding?

  25. Kitchy

    What would be EVEN better than her collapsing…would be something collapsing on her…like a house falling from the sky while her little striped feet shrivel….The Brad would come out of his coma, and so would Katy Holmes . . .and Tom would come out of the closet. . .and Kate Beckinsdale would gain 70 pounds, and Heath ledger would ask Tom Cruise to marry him and move to Tennesee and Paris Hilton would lose ALL of her money in a Hotel lawsuit and be forced to work at Burger King, and Russell Crowe would be born again and open a Nursery School, and Kirsten Dunst would NEVER be hired again except for toilet cleaning commercials and Jude Law’s Nanny would have given him herpes, and Jessica Simpson’s hair would catch on fire as she feel down stairs and lost a leg and K fed and Nick would get caught doing a dirty sanchez by Aston Kutcher on Punk’d, and Demi Moore would age suddenly all at once and look like Shirley Maclaine (no offense Shirley) and well I could go on….the point is Angelina’s power would be destroyed!

  26. benjamin01

    LMAO!! Kitchy that’s awesome!

  27. Hollywood

    Well we’ve identified the crazy guy at the bus stop. He works within the Dominican Republic Cultural Film Commission and his initials are ARF and that is no joke yep ARF just like the lieing dog he is. He was leaking false reports all over the press just like he did with Miami Vice and every other Hollywood production. Seems like he’s a pathetic wannabe who know one even notices unless he’s falsifying gossip. The worst PR man for the DR.
    NOTE TO PRODUCERS – GO TO HAWAII OR THE BAHAMAS ARF SUCKS AND IS A PERFECT REFLECTION OF THE DR.

  28. ‘nervous’ – hell, i’d be a lot more than nervous if my pregnant wife had a huge gash on her head! http://hollywoodsnark.com

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