Despite the fact rumors about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie breaking up happen every nanosecond, the Internet took a collective piss in its pants Saturday night when News of the World reported the couple were drawing up custody agreements for their kids. Their rep has confirmed to JustJared that these reports are, of course, “total b.s.”
Folks, here’s the bottom line: When Brad and Angelina finally realize she’s eventually going to murder them both, you’ll know about it when they fire multi-ethnic children out of a Gatling gun to sing the news in your living room. Trust me.
Photos: Getty
Lio | January 24, 2010 at 11:32 pm
first!!dman joliek is hott
Kitty Furry | January 24, 2010 at 11:35 pm
lame…show some more rubbery old tits, i’m primed!!
Scdo | January 24, 2010 at 11:38 pm
Brad looks like a homeless man. Which is cool to do when you have millions. Not so cool when you are actually homeless.
whocares | January 24, 2010 at 11:38 pm
who cares?
Da Trooooff | January 24, 2010 at 11:39 pm
if there is no COCK or DONATELLA TITS I am not interested….total FAIL
please go away | January 24, 2010 at 11:55 pm
Take away the cute little kid and Brad and Angie could pass for one of those weird couples you can see if you’ve ever had to duck into Wal-Mart on a Friday night to buy diapers or milk or something.
Those weird couples are usually buying stuff like cigarettes, Mike’s Hard Lemonade and those bags of dried pig’s ears for their great big ugly dog.
MajorIndulgence | January 25, 2010 at 12:16 am
that kid is better dressed than the parents
sdfsdfds | January 25, 2010 at 12:36 am
Brad Pitt is not attractive! He never was, and his voice is like nails on a chalkboard. I’m just glad it never dawned on him to try to start a singing career.
Sumi | January 25, 2010 at 12:38 am
The kid looks like brad – nose, kind of around the eyes. I’d be wondering.
sdfsdfds | January 25, 2010 at 12:38 am
Also, you can look at celebs and figure out who creates their image. Like I’m pretty sure Megan Fox and Angelina have the same team. These people have NO personality, no style of their own, nothing… they’re like puppets.
Nutronix2010 | January 25, 2010 at 1:32 am
Really feel happy to see them together :)
Nameless | January 25, 2010 at 2:25 am
They are together (for now) because the situation works. She bangs who she wants; he does the same. As long as no one is complaining, it’s no harm no foul.
Bet they get a divorce the moment Brad bangs Megan Fox though…LOL
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who dat | January 25, 2010 at 2:30 am
Deny it all you want. From PageSix:
Mega-couple Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have secretly signed legal documents dividing their vast fortune and family in case they split, according to Britain’s News of the World. Pitt and Jolie, who are not married but have been together for more than five years, have three biological children as well as three adopted kids and an estimated $300 million fortune. Under the reported deal, hammered out with an LA law firm, the pair would have joint custody over the kids, who would live full time with Jolie. Rumors of a breakup have dogged the couple for years. Recently, Jolie reportedly had an affair with a language coach with whom she was working for an upcoming role, but the teacher vehemently denied it. Neither star appeared at the Golden Globes last Sunday and Pitt made a solo showing at Friday night’s Haiti telethon.
Styxchix | January 25, 2010 at 2:31 am
Why is Maddox dressed like some mini movie mogul? He’s a kid for God’s sake……all of their kids have the fedora look going on, ridiculous. Don’t tell me this is what a child would choose to wear of their own free will……….
HEAVEN 4 RENT | January 25, 2010 at 2:35 am
happiness family
Right | January 25, 2010 at 2:39 am
Her face is beginning to look bit too stretched, needs to lay off the facelifts.
Live Couples Cam Sex | January 25, 2010 at 2:58 am
they make a great couple!
Nero | January 25, 2010 at 3:56 am
Is that true?! If any of them both is reading this.Click on my name!
Nero | January 25, 2010 at 4:00 am
What’s the name of that little foreign boy again?! Hey you,click on my name!
Darth | January 25, 2010 at 4:05 am
Is this a Google ad?!
Galtacticus | January 25, 2010 at 4:18 am
@21 I just typed in ‘help poor foreign people’ and then i got this.
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Pal | January 25, 2010 at 7:32 am
She needs to stop getting cosmetic surgery. She could also cut down on the Botox injections.
Apple in an Orange Basket | January 25, 2010 at 9:05 am
They look happy to me. Perhaps if the parasites were made illegal in this dying nation we wouldn’t be snacking on informational junkfood and would instead read things meaningful?
titsonsnack | January 25, 2010 at 9:22 am
don’t they have like, fifty other children? where are those kids? who’s looking after them?
Rough's goodwill tour | January 25, 2010 at 9:56 am
*Vedly funny dr Jones*
Why are the dressing the kid like a hipster from South Beach…
GG1000 | January 25, 2010 at 10:13 am
She needs to lay off the plastic surgery; she’s starting to look like one of the Na’vi.
Sara | January 25, 2010 at 10:17 am
Oh thank GOD they are staying together! I mean if they broke up what would happen to the universe?
Sport | January 25, 2010 at 10:37 am
someone pass her a sandwich, Geez.
CARLO | January 25, 2010 at 11:45 am
She is still the most beautiful woman of them all!!! I would pay.
Napoleon | January 25, 2010 at 12:16 pm
The look on her face in pic 1 says it all.
“That’s right biaaaatch”
Jack | January 25, 2010 at 1:54 pm
WTF is with those two little squids he has twisted into his beard? Seriously, WTFing F?
Don Knotts | January 25, 2010 at 3:27 pm
What the hell happened to her face?
missywiss | January 25, 2010 at 3:58 pm
I think it’s very obvious they are on the rocks. Brad was sporting a ratty beard when him and Jennifer were on the brink. I think it’s his only way he can say “fuck it”. He’s probably tired of having to pretend to be perfect and her wearing the pants. Just a hunch. Sucks if he’s sticking around to save the Brady Bunch image they created. I know it’s tough though.
my comment | January 25, 2010 at 7:25 pm
Her crazy is starting to come through loud and clear.
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a | January 26, 2010 at 6:38 pm
They’ve lost that loving feeling…..
sd memory card | January 27, 2010 at 4:23 am
They are the very famous couple in the Hollywood as well as across the world..both are the great actor..
Nikki | January 29, 2010 at 12:33 pm
Gooorlami
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Sick to death of "Brangelina" | February 24, 2010 at 2:24 pm
Oh, please! It’s common knowledge that Angelina Jolie makes a practice of breaking up relationships. First, she stole Billy Bob Thornton from his fiancee, Laura Dern. Then, she skanked her way between Brad P. and Jennifer Aniston. Who knows who will be next?!?….Brad’s a loser, anyway, but he’s an even bigger loser for having dumped Jen A. for this slut, in the first place. I just wish they would BOTH go away, though………
travel alarm clock | May 8, 2010 at 3:19 am
I wish Brad would wear a baseball hat every now and again, and not that hat everyday!
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Cheryl | April 6, 2011 at 4:19 pm
Angelilna Jolie has begun to look hard, and not very beautiful anymore. The veins stick out in her bony hands, and it looks like her hairline is receding…her forhead is HUGE! Furthermore, since he’s been “Mr. Jolie”, Brad Pitt looks ridiculous with those stupid hats and chasing after Angelina like a love-sick puppy dog! He should have stayed with Jennifer Aniston…she is a much more gracious person, and has retained her beauty, unlike Jolie! And what kind of neurotic people are they that they keep having and adopting kids…it’s not just what you can financially give your kids, or how “good” you think this makes you look, but what about the individual time and attention you can bestow on each child?! You can adopt 20, but at the end of the day, what special time can you give each one to nurture them emotionally? Grow up, you 2! Your best days are over, obviously!