Angelina Jolie Cries in The Shower Like The Rest of Us

Angelina Jolie has finally opened up to Vanity Fair in kind of this “Life After Brad: A Requiem” story. Her interview will run as the cover story in the September issue and appears only a couple months after ex-husband Brad Pitt spilled his sad beans all over GQ. Instead of trying to rack up sympathy points or play the victim card, the First They Killed My Father director talked about how she’s been coping since her husband tried to ghost ride a fuel truck in a drunken rage. Let’s break it down:

“Things got bad… I didn’t want to use that word. . . . Things became ‘difficult.’”

There has been Hollywood talk that their lifestyle had taken its toll on Pitt, and that he was craving a more stable, normal life for the whole family. When I bring this question up to her, it’s the one moment when Jolie becomes a bit defensive. “[Our lifestyle] was not in any way a negative,” she says quickly, adamantly. “That was not the problem. That is and will remain one of the wonderful opportunities we are able to give our children…”

Translation: “Brad tried to blame his love for whiskey on the fact that we’re both rich and famous. So I told that asshole to sleep in the pool house.”

Jolie continues by throwing Brad back under the bus (which in this case is a fuel truck), by cryptically bringing up some “events” that fucked the kids up for a while.

“We’re all just healing from the events that led to the filing . . . They’re not healing from divorce. They’re healing from some . . . from life, from things in life.”

I don’t think she’s talking about Brad being overly dominant at Wii U (it’s the fuel truck thing again). Things get a lot darker from there when she starts discussing the current status of her relationship with Pitt.

“We care for each other and care about our family, and we are both working towards the same goal…. I was very worried about my mother, growing up—a lot. I do not want my children to be worried about me. I think it’s very important to cry in the shower and not in front of them. They need to know that everything’s going to be all right even when you’re not sure it is.”

I think the mental imagery here is the big difference between Brad Pitt’s exposé and Angelina’s. While Brad told GQ he was living his life like Bilbo Baggins, whittling wood and drinking lots of cranberry juice, Angelina paints this picture of her putting her kids to bed with a smile before collapsing in anguish atop her Italian marble bathroom.

You can read the full Vanity Fair cover story here.