Amy Winehouse redefines ‘sexy’

November 11th, 2008 // 126 Comments

Amy Winehouse held court with the paparazzi outside her house this morning and, aw shit, he’s flatlined. I knew it. Excuse me while I snap my penis out of cardiac arrest:

“Live, dammit! LIVE! No, not like this…. Not like this…. Fight, damn you! Jessica Simpson is just one straight-to-DVD bomb away from doing porn. DON’T YOU DIE ON ME! *sniff* You complete me.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. Mariana

    She is diseased. Scabs on her face, arms, and on her belly which is oddly swollen. Her fingernails are so dirty it’s disgusting. I am surprised she has not succumbed to an MRSA infection–or given one to anyone else. I really wouldn’t be surprised if she has something like scabies or bed bugs in her house.

    I imagine her house must smell like three day old fried chicken, ashtray and sticky panties.

  2. Blu_Tinkerbell_NC

    OMFG…is she pregnant or is that a tumor under her shirt…
    NOT her meat puppies,look alittle lower…..
    OK NOT that low,but OMG what is that wilderbeast between her…NO her stomach..LOOK..what is that?
    My bet it is an experimental alien hatchling from the goverment!
    We will see her on a future issue of Enquirer…
    AND DON”T STEAL MY IDEA,if you do i want 50 bucks!
    Gas ain’t cheap these days and it costs money to come kick your ass.

  3. a girl

    She’s the greatest voice of the past 30 years.
    Common girl get back on the track and be who you can be.

  4. Jorge

    Bitch looks like a man.
    I bet she was one before she became, “he-she”.
    NUFF SEDD

  5. Jones

    Skank Patrol.
    What, no 13 pounds of mascara today, Amy?

  6. icarus

    #44 said: ALWAYS BEING PREYED UPON BY THE PAP SMEARS .

    Yeah, last time I had a pap smear, it told me I had syphillis too…bastard!!!

  7. scott

    blake is prob screwin better lookin dudes in prison that is some scary shit

  8. onnoyoudidnt

    OMG THAT GUY’S COMMENT MADE ME LAUGH SOOOO FREAKEN HARD HAHAHAHA, “LIVE, LIVEEEEE *sniff* you complete me”

    I love witty people *grins*

  9. Kung Fu Pander

    1) The swollen belly is from ascites (swollen from alcohol abuse)
    2) The dirty fingernails are from resin (possibly from crack/meth)
    3) In that snapshot of her eating the cheese sandwich, her teeth are the same color as the cheese. Nice.

    I’ll say this much, that fucking crack-induced Batshit Beehive is now gone. I’m loving the new look. Seriously, I can’t believe people loved that Elvira makeup and that ball of yarn attached to Winehouse’s head!

  10. How did she get those six-pack abs?

    This looks like someone opened the door on the trailer from Hell or something.

  11. Love her voice when she’s on point. Hope she’s around to put out more music.

  12. Chauncy

    Nothing is sexier than a drugged-out Jew Brit…Hmmmm please dont break me of any of that.

  13. Bitch looks like Sasha Baron Cohen with bad teeth.

  14. britney

    WTF!!!!!!!!!!!! ha ha ha lmfao

  15. someone please kill her, save us all.

  16. Poor Amy. I hope she makes a comeback. She has one of the best voices of all time. Incredible talent. Sometimes drugs and alcohol are more fun than being famous.

  17. meowmo

    amy winehouse is a man. it’s so obvious.

  18. meowmo

    amy winehouse is a man. it’s so obvious.

  19. Rob

    Meow!!!!!!!!!!
    *Clicks and save pictures to have a wank to*

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Kidding!

  20. pizzle

    She sorta reminds me of crackhead Linda Richman. “An 8 ball is neither an 8 or a ball…..discuss”.

  21. Pablo

    PPL do u see what crack causes u to look like

  22. DG

    THE DRUGGIE HAS 4 TOES DAMN THATS JUST NASTY PUT THAT BITCH IN A ZOO

  23. Wil

    Shes a Alien

  24. Wil

    Shes a Alien

  25. neo

    oh my god! my penis just lost consciousness! he..he just collapsed! i hope he will survive this shock…

  26. man.. i need a fix now!

    real hot trannies

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