Amy Winehouse finds a new undead lover

February 13th, 2008 // 99 Comments

Amy Winehouse has been spending a lot of time with artist/photographer Blake Wood (above). The two stayed the night in a hotel room together but Amy is telling people he’s gay. Word is he might be competition for Amy’s jailed husband Blake Fielder-Civil who, coincidentally, is also a zombie. The Sun reports:

A pal said: “She’s said it’s fine so share a hotel room because he is gay. But he doesn’t seem gay to me — I think he’s bisexual. Amy’s husband wouldn’t be happy if he saw how close they are.”
This new Blake character sounds like a much better influence than her jailed hubby FIELDER-CIVIL. He is a drug-free, teetotal veggie who likes reading the works of French poet CHARLES BAUDELAIRE.

I included pics of Amy out on the town last night with her new Blake. Before changing into the shirt and tie combo, she was walking around like Chesty LaRue. She seems to be showing off the goods lately. I dunno if she’s just getting her money’s worth or proud to have defied the laws of chemistry. Amy Winehouse did enough blow to turn her breasts into raisins but yet, magically, they survived. I bet those things could withstand a nuclear attack. Let’s get Amy out in the desert and drop a bomb on her – for science, of course. Yeah, science…

Photos: Bauer-Griffin

  1. That is one scary BITCH!!

  2. Jammy

    She better hope they’re not on the way to the optometrist.
    Also, he will shortly know what insect sex feels like.

  3. bigSTEAMYone

    Creepygirl !!,creepy-creepy-creepy

  4. dictionary widow

    i think she looks great but her husband is a lot hotter than the guy shown above. anyway i hope that things get better for her

  5. AnonymousV

    Finally she has some decent boobs and some meat on her legs again :D Yay for no drugs!!!

    That dudes a freak!

  6. Victoria

    She looks like she’s about to shout, “Hay baybee! 20 bucks and I’ll make your dreams come true!” into a car with a guy and his pregnant wife in it. She needs a new pimp, though. That guy’s totally gonna kill her business if he keeps standing there looking like that.

  7. D. Richards (Saint.)

    I didn’t know Lurch had a son. I mean, I always thought that Lurch was ‘single’; And spent a lot of time with young boys. Hmm, you learn something new everyday.

    ‘French author’?! Fuck, I’d rather read Binky.

  8. 1 MILF Hunter

    #7 ROFLMAO!!!

    Lurch spent his off time with Uncle Fester.

  9. lele

    when did she get boobs?

  10. Give Paris her bra back!!!

  11. Sherrie

    At least she won’t have to change the tattoo on her chest with this guy – his name is already Blake.

  12. Amy DID turn her breasts into raisins, which is why she is sporting those new breast implants.

  13. MassGrrl

    When she’s not all cracked out, she looks good. Really. Take away the stupid hair and ridiculous make-up, and she’s quite attractive.

    And I’m not just saying that because people tell me that I look just like her… without the stupid hair and ridiculous make-up.

  14. D. Richards

    #9. Lurch enjoyed playing with the boils on Uncle Fester’s buttoch. Ha-Ha!

  15. Thomas

    Jesuz H. Krist! These are the same tits that made her VISIBLY WINCE in olfactory distress!

    Garbage Cans! Big Floppy GARBAGE CANS!!!

  16. Phillip McGraw PhD

    I am appalled at the unscientific and hostile manner in which this is being discussed.

    The undead or more correctly, “Necro-Americans” should be accorded our respect and only staked, burned or doused in garlic-laded holy water when dialogue fails and/or they prove to be really annoying.

    Yelling at the brown stuff on your shoes is never better than just walking around the pile. So if you’re not just walking around that pile named Amy-Blake1-Blake2 you might as well buy some brown socks, Chester, cause you’re gonna go deep.

    -Dr. Phil

  17. Realist

    Amy had enormous boobs when she was fatter. I don’t think they ever went away and don’t think she had implants. I’ve NEVER seen her really flat-chested like other cokewhores such as Loho and Nicole Richie.

  18. She has smallish tits that look like eggs that were thrown against the walls and are slowly sliding down. Those are the easiest to mold into big looking boobs. She should try that to her “ass”.

  19. Cap'n Pickles

    He’s way to fugly to be gay. I always thought there was an unspoken rule. You have to be “THIS HOT” to get on the hershey ride.

  20. UCrawford

    He is a drug-free, teetotal veggie who likes reading the works of French poet CHARLES BAUDELAIRE.

    Definitely gay. :)

  21. Auntie Kryst

    That long-haired Limey freak reminds me of Neil from The Young Ones.

  22. He’s got a fairly nice bulge in his pants. So, yeah, he’s gay.

  23. Crazy/Beatiful/BringItOn

    she may be “sober” but she’ll never be the same. She’s pretty chav trying to hide it behind some motown look and feel.

  24. Gerald_Tarrant

    It is Neil.

    And since he is English, he is gay. It goes without saying.

    You can’t talk shit with an English accent.

    “I’m going to kick your bloody arse.”

    Doesn’t instill fear when said like a limey.

  25. Nathan


  26. She is the best ever...ever...forever!

    This beautiful lady has more to offer than all of hollywood and the entertainment industry combined. Genius. Best voice amazing lyrics engaging personality. It is like she was delivered to us by God himself. She makes me believe in the almighty. No way could something as divine as this angel be anything less than a godsend. I fall on my knees whenever I hear her miraculous voice. It is like a messenger of the lord is praying to us – the unworthy.
    She is the greatest creation of God.

  27. I’ve never heard this woman speak, but for some reason I picture it sounding like Janice from Friends..

  28. Gerald_Tarrant

    #28-Step away from the crack pipe.

  29. steve

    I just had a nature shattering idea….what if there is an Amy Winehouse sex tape? I think we should all put our heads together, and put down ten reasons not to watch it, for the sake of posterity:

    Reason number 1: Her skanky, smelly bush starts at her navel and goes down to her knees.

  30. Auntie Kryst

    @28 You’re right, she is sent to us from God. She’s a heeb so we’re talking the Old Testament God (oi vey). The same vengeful punishing God that leveled Sodom & Gomorrah. The punishment God sends us today…Amy Winehouse.

  31. craigj

    Slightly better than average boobs in a push up bra. Not that there’s anything wrong with that … the only thing wrong is the crappy hair and makeup by Sharpie.

  32. Nathan Sprinkle

    She looks way better than usual in these pictures. But I think she sent her essence into that guy and stole his. Because He looks like she looked 2 days ago. Poor Lifeless zombie guy.

  33. Dar

    Maybe this was just a conjugal visit by proxy.

  34. Jenny



  35. FCS

    I like his trout shoulders

  36. JJ

    They’re babies would be the ugliest, horse faced babie ever!

  37. MMB

    UMMMMMMMMM!!!!! Look closely at her right breast in pic 2….WHAT THE HELL!!!!??? it’s all lumpy and wierd!!!! I think she must have some of those cutlets in or some shit!

  38. They do look like implants, but she looks really good here. Nice tan, no scabby bruised legs, and a nice outfit.

  39. Mal Gusto

    Amy reminds me of this girl named Lisa Dyche I knew in South Florida in the 80′s. Do any of you know her?

  40. misery bunny

    oh for the love of living coat hangers: she had tits when she was large/normal, and no tits when she started doing tracks.

  41. yak

    I love zombies!!!

  42. edidas

    Why the long face, man?

  43. Ted from LA

    I heard they already picked out names for their children. Here are their names in order of preference:
    1. Secretariat.
    2. Barbaro.
    3. Smarty Jones.
    4. Winning Colors (if it’s a girl).

  44. shanipie

    Does Everyone in England look like an Alien? I don’t think we have people this deformed in America Do we?

  45. Costco:It's What's For Dinner

    Here I am reading The Ficial when I should be doing the domestic, oh well, too bad, maybe next year. Whorehound Blake is probably doing a societal coming out so he can score a better husband. Amy I-Need-Attention-24-hours-a-day is only too happy to oblige. When Jailhouse Rocks Blake gets out, he will probably look like the guy from the MTV music video “Money For Nothing” and that will be the most interesting thing about him.

  46. fright night

    Does she even have a sex drive?

    …and what is going on in that first pic! Is Amy’s image a mere collage made up from different photos? Her lower half looks 20% smaller than her upper half,yet her upper half is missing a torso. Why is her head the biggest thing on her and its sitting on her shoulders?

    He must have the fisheye lens pointed directly at his forehead. Jeezus! Am I at the drive in?

    Talk about surreal. They should go hang out with these guys…

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