Amy Schumer’s Vagina Stopped Gun Violence, Cleared It Right Up

If you’ve read this site for any length of time, you’re probably aware that I think the 2nd amendment should be rewritten to put the NRA in concentration camps where Obama forces them to melt their guns into actual metal dicks to shove up each others buttholes. – And I need a cigarette. – So you’d just assume I’d be on board with Amy Schumer using her vagina to promote gun safety, except I have no fucking clue what anyone’s supposed to do with this. And don’t tell me it “opened up a dialog” because that means shitballs on a medium where the tiniest of minutiae starts a “dialog.” Someone could say Mario from Super Mario Bros. should shave his mustache and within an hour we’d be taint-deep in death threats, rape tweets, and thinkpieces on the patriarchal oppression of facial hair, yet that Italian bastard would still be thumbing that thing in our faces from his Mushroom Tower. Where does he get off?

Today please #wearorange for gun safety! #everytown

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