Amber Rose in a bikini

August 31st, 2009 // 97 Comments

A freaky-eyed Amber Rose stopped by TAO Beach in Vegas over the weekend. Apparently the Jon Gosselin pool party wasn’t her cup of tea, but wouldn’t it have been hilarious if she went and he worked his slovenly magic on her? I can almost read Kanye’s blog now:

“WHAT?! WHAT?! I’M KANYE WEST!!!! I’M BASICALLY JESUS SENT BACK TO EARTH TO DESIGN RED LOUIS VUITTON SNEAKERS AND BREAK PEOPLE’S CAMERAS BECAUSE I’M TRYING TO CARRY AROUND MY MACBOOK PRO AND LOOK SUPER IMPORTANT! AND THIS GIRL IS GONNA CHEAT ON ME WITH JON GOSSELIN?!?!??!???! HOW I’M SUPPOSED TO BE GREAT?!!?! WHAT IS A JON GOSSELIN? WHAT’S THIS FOOL GOT THAT I DON’T GOT IN DIAMOND SPADES WITH DIAMONDS ON THE INSIDE?!? AND DIAMOND SAUCE!

UPDATE: I’VE JUST BEEN INFORMED WHO JON GOSSELIN IS! KANYE WEST IS GOING TO KILL HIMSELF NOW! THIS WILL BE THE GREATEST SUICIDE KNOWN TO MAN! BUT I NEED TO HUMBLE MYSELF FIRST! SOMEBODY LEAVE THE CRUST ON MY SANDWICH!!!!!! I DON’T DESERVE IT CUT OFF ANYMORE BECAUSE I’M THE HUMBLEST BITCH ALIVE!!”

Photos: WireImage
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Comments (97)

  1. name it for christ sake | August 31, 2009 at 10:18 am

    i hit that…with a wood Stake. XD

    Reply
  2. Ohnoshedient | August 31, 2009 at 10:20 am

    Someone stab it before it eats the guests.

    Reply
  3. Bobby Junior | August 31, 2009 at 10:22 am

    That one little blonde haired boy looks odd.

    Reply
  4. fearsarewishes | August 31, 2009 at 10:23 am

    @1

    You missed English 101 to post that fucking comment you stupid cunt?

    Why the fuck would you capitalize “stake”?

    JFC

    Reply
  5. CobraStyle | August 31, 2009 at 10:25 am

    Bajesus!

    Reply
  6. ROUGH before dishonor | August 31, 2009 at 10:25 am

    Hotter with mane——————————————————————————————————–

    Reply
  7. hacksaw | August 31, 2009 at 10:26 am

    I’d hit it.

    Reply
  8. Giggles | August 31, 2009 at 10:27 am

    Thanks for ruining my morning.

    Reply
  9. http://www.popduds.com/ | August 31, 2009 at 10:27 am

    DO NOT WANT!!
    DO NOT WANT!!
    DO NOT WANT!!

    Reply
  10. Awanupinthat | August 31, 2009 at 10:27 am

    She looks awesome if you scroll down so her head is out of the frame. Try it, you’ll love it.
    Amber Rose the paper bag princess.

    Reply
  11. Pilatunes | August 31, 2009 at 10:29 am

    No thanks, sideshow freaks were never my thing.

    Reply
  12. North Pole | August 31, 2009 at 10:32 am

    Hey guys I’m taking a poll.
    Do you think she’s vain? She looks self absorbed to me, I can’t tell, I need your input. If you think she’s vain then please leave some comments here.
    Another poll I just thought of. If this person was hit by a truck carrying gasoline burning on fire which then exploded her into a firey ball of hell leaving her dead you think she would be missed? I don’t think she would be missed.

    Reply
  13. chupacabra | August 31, 2009 at 10:38 am

    she looks like a character out of “The Filth” by Grant Morrison:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Filth_(comics)

    Reply
  14. Aunt Jemima | August 31, 2009 at 10:46 am

    PUKE.

    Reply
  15. tromba | August 31, 2009 at 10:54 am

    I feel my raisin bran coming back up.

    Reply
  16. Island Man | August 31, 2009 at 10:57 am

    WTF ? No booty pics ???? Oh c’mon…………U gotz 2 b kiddin me

    Reply
  17. Exotic_Honey | August 31, 2009 at 10:59 am

    scary shyt…

    Reply
  18. Exotic_Honey | August 31, 2009 at 11:00 am

    my eyes are burning lol!

    Reply
  19. Avatar | August 31, 2009 at 11:02 am

    If a guy is into the stereotypical rap getto chick with a big ass, big thighs, and implants then enjoy!

    Reply
  20. Courageous | August 31, 2009 at 11:04 am

    Nice legs, shame about the face! Not to mention the horrible taste in men…

    Reply
  21. Annuity | August 31, 2009 at 11:06 am

    Wow, that’s a deeply disturbing, unhealthy orange glow.

    Reply
  22. Aunt Jemima | August 31, 2009 at 11:14 am

    Kayne West should stop pissing on women. He’s given her pink eye.

    Reply
  23. Monday Monday | August 31, 2009 at 11:19 am

    Wow… did you really have to start the week like this? After those delicious Gerri Halliwell shots, this is like falling into a fry-o-lator. Yikes…

    Reply
  24. sin | August 31, 2009 at 11:23 am

    Damn, what an obvious tranny. Do the test. Its ring ringer is longer than its index finger. Try it. On men the ring finger is longer. On women it is either equal in lenght or a little longer. That is a tranny. Kanye West fucks trannies.

    Reply
  25. Soul Sistah | August 31, 2009 at 11:29 am

    She almost as hot as Coco. Get some!

    Reply
  26. ®usty | August 31, 2009 at 11:33 am

    ick! the doody tattoo running down her leg kills it for me…also her being fugly doesn’t help either.

    Reply
  27. cd | August 31, 2009 at 11:41 am

    doesn’t it look like she has a bit of a lazy eye?

    Reply
  28. Anonymity+Audience | August 31, 2009 at 11:53 am

    How long was she on chemo? Her tattoos are horrendous. She has very poor decision making skills.

    Reply
  29. Nation Wide | August 31, 2009 at 11:53 am

    Those colored contacts make everyone look creepy. I have blue eyes and tried some demos on, which by the way have the word “Demo” stamped on them, really cheesy, and you couldn’t even tell I had them on. I tried six different colors including the new radiant, which I was told would make my eyes sparkle. Finally, I just couldn’t believe that they didn’t work, so I looked at some YouTube videos of people with dark eyes wearing them, and they too didn’t see any noticeable change.

    Oh, I just got it, she must be wearing those Halloween opaque lenses, well that explains why they work on her, but she still looks creepy like a psycho killer.

    Reply
  30. name it for christ sake | August 31, 2009 at 11:58 am

    # 4 -

    Stake is capitalized for EMPHISIS, you rudimentary twit. All of us that write on blogs use creative license when we write, so you’re fired!

    Reply
  31. Mike | August 31, 2009 at 12:01 pm

    Kanye wouldn’t kill himself. He’d call it Assassinating himself. Much cooler.

    Reply
  32. fearsarewishes | August 31, 2009 at 12:05 pm

    @30

    …and “EMPHISIS” is misspelled because you are a stupid cunt.

    Morons like you wear me out.

    Reply
  33. gotmilk? | August 31, 2009 at 12:05 pm

    29, thanks for your life story. no one cares.

    Reply
  34. kariella | August 31, 2009 at 12:14 pm

    #10 – You are sooooo right! Everyone try it.

    Reply
  35. michael jackson | August 31, 2009 at 12:16 pm

    what the F&%K is that thing?!?

    Reply
  36. I'm Obama and I approve... | August 31, 2009 at 12:24 pm

    Kanye West hates white people…

    Reply
  37. I'm Obama and I approve... | August 31, 2009 at 12:25 pm

    Kanye West hates white people…

    Reply
  38. Adam | August 31, 2009 at 12:30 pm

    It looks like someone flash fried Mystique from the X-men movies.

    Seriously, I know I look bad in swimwear, so I have the good sense to cover my shit up.

    Reply
  39. joe blow | August 31, 2009 at 12:32 pm

    She’s skankalicious.

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, after seeing that nasty bitch, I must go wash my eyes with battery acid.

    Reply
  40. n | August 31, 2009 at 12:38 pm

    lookin’ very oompah loompah. *barf*

    Reply
  41. n | August 31, 2009 at 12:38 pm

    lookin’ very oompah loompah. *barf*

    Reply
  42. christ | August 31, 2009 at 1:31 pm

    Kanye West hates white people, and fucks trannys.

    You heard it here first.

    Reply
  43. sin | August 31, 2009 at 1:40 pm

    # 42. I already proved she is a tranny. See # 24.

    Reply
  44. ritzy | August 31, 2009 at 1:48 pm

    She/he/it is a man and a fugly one

    Reply
  45. wtf | August 31, 2009 at 1:49 pm

    i like how she wears blue contacts and blond dyed hair, shes obvioulsy trying to hide her blackness, what a aunt-tom!

    Reply
  46. Me | August 31, 2009 at 3:13 pm

    I’d fuck her down into her component elements.

    Reply
  47. Bert | August 31, 2009 at 3:17 pm

    Nasty , nasty, nasty

    Reply
  48. Larry King | August 31, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    I don’t ever remember seeing a mormon; not once, not ever.

    Reply
  49. hateyoufornoreason | August 31, 2009 at 3:21 pm

    Gross, dirty street hooker.

    Reply
  50. lola | August 31, 2009 at 3:23 pm

    She would be such a pretty girl if she would throw away the contacts and grow her hair out. She doesn’t need long hair, just a couple of inches so it’s not a buzz-cut.

    Reply

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