Amanda Bynes’ Rap Album Is Something That’s Happening In Real Life

June 18th, 2013 // 19 Comments
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Seen here in Atlantic City over the weekend (h/t TMZ), Amanda Bynes‘ rap album is apparently happening in real life which has to be a first time for something she’s Tweeted. I always thought it’d be the vagina slapping, but that’s probably my natural bias for unorthodox crime fighting. E! News reports:

Amanda Bynes is meeting up tonight with Wyclef Jean to discuss a possible album collaboration, Chinga Chang Records CEO Dan Herman—who will also be in attendance—exclusively tells E! News.
“I think it would be perfect,” says Herman. “Linking the two of them will be something major.”
Wyclef has been very “receptive” to the idea of meeting with Bynes to brainstorm ideas, Hermon says, noting that he’s confident such a pairing would be “great.”
“This album is going to shock the world,” he adds. “She has such a great voice. Singers wish they could hit the notes that Amanda does.”

I like how we’re supposed to pretend this has nothing to do with Amanda Bynes being a bajillion hit sideshow, and everything to do with her suddenly being a phenomenal singer now. In her secret language, maybe, but in people words, not so much. That said, I look forward to her first single, “Ugly Muggle Wuggle Drake Kano Tay Boony (Us Weekly Has Chinese Editors Remix).”

You can almost taste the musical sensation.

Photos: Courtesy of


  1. Sorry honey, Joaquin Phoenix pulled the “I’m crazy and going to rap” schtick much better.

  2. Good lord, as if we didn’t have enough shitty music. On the bright side, this increases the chances of me seeing her naked one day.

  3. Let me translate that headline based on the information contained in the post, “Amanda Bynes’ Rap Album Is Not Something That’s Happening In Real Life”

  4. Amanda Bynes Wig Pool Atlantic City
    Commented on this photo:

    Harry Manback is thinking his hooker needs to put down the damn phone.

  5. Prediction: Amanda Bynes ends up burning her master recordings and breaking her contract because Wyclef Jean wanted to remix her music into dubstep. “The teevee told me to do that,” Bynes will go on to explain.

  6. …no tattoos or cheek piercings?

  7. Amanda Bynes Wig Pool Atlantic City
    Commented on this photo:

    why that man wear sweater in to hot tub?

  8. Jim

    Oh cool. I always wondered what cancer sounded like?

  9. Maybe Amanda will have a rap battle with Dana Perino. There will be no winners and the loser will be anyone who hears it.

    • Randal

      Of course! Who could possibly forget her star turn as “Penne Pingleton” in “Hairspray”. The voice of an angel and the body of a siren, there is no doubt this superstar will end up in more than one category at the next Grammys.


  10. Amanda Bynes Wig Pool Atlantic City
    Commented on this photo:

    “Shit, mine’s not working either… Try it under the water again.”

  11. Amanda Bynes Wig Pool Atlantic City
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture makes me wish she was holding a hairdryer.


    Sit down, Randal. No more talking for you for the rest of the day.

  13. cc

    The release party at Guantanamo Bay is going to be a blast.

  14. So Wyclef Jean, who hasn’t had a hit since 2007 (?) and whose “Haiti Charity” is under investigation by the NY Attorney General “over allegations of mismanagement – including improper payments by the charity to Jean, members of his family and others connected to Jean.” (Wikipedia) has found a delusional former child actress with several million dollars to pay his way for a while while they “work” together. Why can I never fall into situations like that?

  15. “She has such a great voice. Singers wish they could hit the notes that Amanda does.”

    Probably has nothing to do with those magnificent tits!

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