Yesterday, In Touch‘s latest issue hit newsstands and inside were photos of Amanda Bynes‘ apartment that, honestly, don’t look that bad and were way better than what I expected. For starters, I didn’t even see Drake‘s dead body anywhere. Amanda Bynes, on the other hand, felt they looked nothing like the posh, drug-free high fashion fuck-lair of hotness she clearly lives in and, here’s where it gets completely unprecedented, plans to sue In Touch for photoshopping her head on a fake body. Via Twitter:
That’s not my bed! Those aren’t my toes! My toes are pedicured! I just did an exclusive interview with intouch last week, now they bought fake altered photos by that ugly black man in the photo or someone who knows him! They used an old shot of me on the cover with a bad angle of my old nose before I had surgery to reshape my profile and to remove the webbing from my eyes. I have to sue because that’s not my apartment, those aren’t my clothes! They morphed photos of my face onto someone’s body to ruin my life! I have to make a big deal of this and sue because that’s not me! I care about my appearance so I have to defend myself! I look like a different person now that I had surgery! Why did they put an old shot of me on the cover? I don’t look like that anymore! I only want photos of my gorgeous new nose on the cover of tabloids and real magazines! The photos in this issue are fake and mocked up! I don’t care enough to keep talking about it. Just assume that I fucked the boyfriend of the editor of intouch because they fucking hate me!
Amanda goes on to name the “ugly faced” In Touch editor whose boyfriend obviously couldn’t resist fucking all this hotness because if you tweet something enough times, it becomes reality. Right, Jose Canseco?