Almost Reese Witherspoon’s vagina and for some reason Renee Zellweger

March 3rd, 2010 // 52 Comments

Despite the fact the Internet went crazy today over last night’s Vera Wang launch, I was going to avoid these pics because the thought of Reese Witherspoon and Renee Zellweger in the same room is about as sexy as mayonnaise. But then I found this shot of Reese getting out of her car which is probably the closest anyone will ever get to seeing her vagina. Not counting Jake Gyllenhaal and Ryan Phillippe. Or me if I felt like waxing my chest and incurring multiple chin stabs. (Anyone know how much is too much blood loss? Just looking for ballparks.)

superficial

  1. Gerald_Tarrant

    I like Reese. Met her once while she was walking her dog. She’s cute. Are you sure that is Renee Zellweger or did Sharon Stone get more plastic surgery? I think this is the first time I have ever seen Renee’s eyes and I have to say that I know why she kept them squinted up for so long.

  2. Lisa

    First?

  3. Fuck You Moron

    Done coming here.

    This place sucks now.

  4. Lisa

    Darn, I’ve been reading this site forever and have always wanted to do that! Haha. Oh well.

  5. Lisa

    Darn, I’ve been reading this site forever and have always wanted to do that, maybe next time!

  6. mer

    Do what? Be publicly acknowledged as an idiot?

  7. isofakingsaid

    why does she look like willem dafoe?

  8. havoc

    Willem Dafoe has better legs…..

    .

  9. noncom

    Not a big fan of blondes actually. More of a fan of Randal!!!!!
    Raaaandaall where are you…Yoooooohooooooooooooooo?

  10. Wacker

    Almost a article someone gives a fuck about!! NOT!!!

  11. The Pig on the Internet

    I would pull my wang from Reese’s bum
    and shoot a load on Renee’s waiting tongue.

  12. mar

    you ca be sure of three things: She has legs, she has nosestrings, she´s the last lady in hollywood.

  13. cddddm

    shes so so so skinny looking

  14. hateyoufornoreason

    Why is Rene flexing and thrusting her chest forward in every picture? Does she think this is attractive when she does it in the mirror?

  15. Lenny

    You know that baby is hairless. But in my dream she has never shaved and that pussy has hair everywhere.

  16. Dank

    Soo uh, wheres the vagina? Cause all i see are legs touching each other

  17. morga

    Reese is a cutie.

    Probably boring in bed, though. Wants the romantic shit like soft music and candles. Thinks that changing from missionary to cowgirl is a “pretty kinky night”.

  18. kIKI

    That is a most unfortunate picture of Reese in the lead photo. LOLOL! Would it have been posted if she wasn’t getting out of a car! I love it!

  19. I’m gonna be honest here–I’d gladly fuck one or both of them together. Reese is cute and Renee isn’t bad looking either (she’s not a super model but not ugly either).

  20. timmy the dying boy

    I think Renee had better stop hanging with Reese. Reese is certainly doing her no favors, looks-wise.

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  22. Rough debunks

    Id go see the next installment to SCREAM starring ms Witherspoon. Why not!

  23. Giorgio!

    They look like sisters! Both are pretty, Reese is always cute and Renee looks good and she is almost 41 now.

  24. She’d be fine if only she got one of sawzall surgeries to take down her chin.

  25. rk

    really? prefer renee slutface zelwegger to reese? settle!

  26. Lea

    There goes fatkitty again, promoting uniformity among women as beauty.

    I love Reese’s features! It’s the imperfections that makes her beauty her own.

  27. ppl

    pretty ugly and the beast… uffph

  28. What is she zonked out on crack? WTF??? She looks like she is totally high in that main picture. Either that or she is crazy.

  29. Dread not

    In the first pic, Reese looks like she should be wearing a helmet, drool cup, and water wings so she doesn’t drown in a puddle.

  30. Reese is looking a bit old and thin lately. But still cute and still looks years younger than Lohan. She reminds me less of a celebrity and more of a southern society wife. Boring as vanilla but I’ve always liked her.
    Renee has always been ugly. I don’t even know what color eyes she has or what her lips look like because she’s always had that “I just sucked a lemon” face. Her body is nothing more than skin and bones, and judging by her skin, she’s been dead for approximately 20 years. Not a good look.

  31. sTaR

    Look at how pretty they both are! They are intelligent classy and beautiful. They are strong and they are as above said some of the last classy ladies of Hollywood, and probably most of the U. S. of A. as douchebags like you trampasize women and degrade their capablities.

  32. indieguy

    Awful, unhealthy looking women.

    Uggh.

  33. captain america

    most americans have the same problem though.
    looking “ONE DOLLAR-FIFTY”-horny!!

  34. Mandi

    What a tragic picture of Reese, gorgeous dress though.

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  36. pappy

    gahhh look at those nostrils, looks like shes on drugs, my gf makes that face shes making in pic #1 while she sleeps its hot

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  38. LPB

    First pic is just one of those strange expressions that will get captured if you take thousands of pictures of someone.

    I think Reese is great looking, she does have a strange looking chin, but I could get over that.

  39. Fuck You

    I don’t think you know what a vagina is. Hell, you don’t even know what almost-vagina is. Fuck you, Fish. This is why I never come here anymore except when I accidentally click on a link from another, far superior site.

  40. tony romo

    overrated biatch!. with that chin you could kill someone.

  41. SATAN

    i’ve never found that bitch witherspoon to be attractive… somethin about a small pointy chin and a dinosaur forehead is a ratio i find to be off-putting.

    STUPID BITCH!

  42. He’s above the hyper-publicity and is in a happy relationship.

  43. He’s above the hyper-publicity and is in a happy relationship.

  44. Hi Guy’s,
    I’ve been reading this site forever and have always wanted to do that, maybe next time!

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  46. undahpresha

    Willem Dafoe is smokin’!

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