Alicia Keys makes pianos sexy

December 5th, 2007 // 109 Comments

Alicia Keys attended the 54th ONDA Awards in Barcelona, Spain. I have no idea what any of that means, but I’m sure it’s a fancy way of saying “watch the hot chick play the piano.” Does anyone think there’s something odd about the crotch of her pants? It’s almost like her vagina is trying to eat her clothes. Can they do that? If so, has NASA perfected the chain-mail condom yet? All they had to do was follow the blueprints I drew in pencil on a wet bar napkin. How hard is that?

Photos: INFdaily.com
superficial

  1. nagger please

    She looks good because she’s half white. The problem is from the waist down she’s obviously negro. Meaning linebacker thighs, ass, and calves.

  2. Karisha

    She must be smuggling illegalsin her pants! LMFAO

  3. Karisha

    She must be smuggling illegals in her pants! LMFAO

  4. michelle

    she has a “mumbler”

  5. Christopher

    Damn, look at that gash

  6. Yes, she is so sexy. Her nude photos look more sexy. I saw her profile on nudidstconnect.com. That is a nudist friendshup site. Is she a nudist? Or enjoy the lifestyle??

  7. I got ur nagger

    nagger please – December 5, 2007 8:03 PM

    She looks good because she’s half white. The problem is from the waist down she’s obviously negro. Meaning linebacker thighs, ass, and calves.

    –u r obviously a jealous little pink person. Alicia is sexy as hell! I’ll take her and her thick legs over any anorexic White chick out there! Firm ass is better than pancake flabby pink ass anyday..

  8. aaron

    She looks hot to me. If you want to ensure women only wear baggy clothes, keep on bitchin’ about things that a lot of us happen to like. Maybe burqas are your thing or maybe you would prefer tidy whites and a little house on the prairie dress.

  9. jack-in-the-green

    she is FINE, people. hot, sexy and talented.

  10. Karisha

    Someone needs to tell her to start using tampons on those heavy days instead of the oversized mattress of a maxi pads she is using under those pants!

  11. gkglug[9

    alicia keys is a career whore dyke. and her music fucking sucks.

  12. Karisha

    oh people here really need to lighten up and join the hecklers or get lost! no room for moody defensive people here…come on! lets have a laugh instead

  13. I'd Hit It

    I’d Hit It

  14. toma

    She is always so sexy. But recently she was seen wondering on sugarmommymeet.com.As you saw the name, you can guess what kind the site is.Yes,it is a site for rich women looking handsome boys. Does she need a sugar baby?

  15. IWONKY

    Way to misspell the name of your own site #56.

  16. Beastman

    Alicia Keys is hot as hell – in some pics she has the face of a supermodel.

    All you bastards that are posting links in your messages – I hope your genitals melt off and you all get raped raw by a pack of orcas. Orcas with AIDS.

  17. What happened to the Kiefer Sutherland story?
    I see a lot of 24 ads here….
    Hummmm…
    Not a good sign Fish….kinda makes this site part of the problem…

  18. Now the Kiefer Sutherland story is back up…
    WTF ?

  19. Mr Semprini

    She totally has a package, dude…

  20. sofia

    People who judge only by the appearance are superficial.Besides beauty is not something to argue about. Everyone has its specific taste in women and music.So,there is no need to fight and say nasty things about her and to each other.And her private life is her own so stay out!!!She achived more than all of you combined!Our world will never be better as long as there are people with that nasty attitude!It’s so easy to judge but no one likes to be judged.So cut it out!!!

  21. Show your tricks at “Howl at the moon” in Univeral city. I guess the public will be pleased to see you entertaining!!

  22. yarden

    we have a word for that in hebrew “kapak” :)

  23. WOWZERS A KEYS DIDNT KNOW IT WAS BUILT LIKE DAT DOWN THERE!!!!

    http://WWW.MYSPACE.COM/NELMOTZYESQ

  24. BEP

    thats some funny fuckin shit
    and btw her new song, is a total rip off from BlackEyesPIss- wheres the love

  25. CS

    OMG, her song just came on my ipod. That’s so sexy.

  26. CS

    OMG, her song just came on my ipod. That’s so sexy.

  27. I don’t get some of these comments putting various women down for small imperfections. Those of you who post these put downs are probably still virgins beating off right now and haven’t experienced real life sex. Admit it you jerk off daily.
    Check out the everyday women/girls post on this site from around the world. See what’s waiting on you… maybe

    http://priceless420.com/NewPics.htm

  28. The White Urkel

    Isn’t she half coon? That is what I heard anyway. Either way, I would still stuff her camel toe. Unless Texas Tranny cab assure me she “tucked” her package.

  29. half coon??

    A. Keys is big on bumpin’ clams.

  30. Bizzer

    Barbie looks like a Ken doll….

  31. kristal

    never really liked her shes annoying like mariah carey what do they call that whale now oh ya mimi puke me ….alicia keys is getting brutal with all the stars and there money they should hire a some personal trainers …. so we dont have to look at there nasty asses ….we aresupposedto look up to these moo moos … anyhow, crotch pics is SO NASTY …this is sick cant wait for it to be tomorrow now lmfao

  32. Mike Motorcycle

    MMmm, sweet, plump, healthy vagina. There’s enough guk down there to fill your whole mouth. I bet her inner lips are that purplish color you see on some dark skinned chicks- yummy. God I love pussy. Kinda weird for us guys that just a picture of a women’s pussy (without the body attached) will turn us on. Must be evolutionary in nature.

  33. mee

    the racist people on here are too funny, i cant even take them seriously lol, they just sound crazy…very entertaining. n word this and that…coon…nagger?? lol its so lame its just funny

  34. Mdiz

    Of the many things i do not know,
    I will never get the Camel toe…

    Booo

  35. yukadoozer

    Spanx eats your crotch.

  36. Mdiz

    Check that… It’s a ball-gina, Seriously, there has to be a set of balls in there..

  37. Shallo Val

    22 – I’m right there with you. Although I think Keyes is better suited for acting, she is a good piano player. That’s it. Merely good.

    Tori is a fucking virtuoso.

  38. nagger please

    9 porch monkeys viciously attack 26 year old white girl on train. When is the Revolution coming?

    http://www.examiner.com/a-1089067~Students_beat_woman_on_city_bus__police_say.html

  39. mememe

    so what she’s not Beethoven, she’s a SINGER who can play an instrument, not a pianist who can sing. Not that I didn’t already know this by the amount of “funny” racist comments posted every time a non-white person is posted on this site, but its pretty obvious that 95% of the people who come here are suburban white folks, cuz to the R&B listening community (ie black people), she is almost unanimously a goddess. And to the lesbian community, she is also unanimously a big dyke. yeah, let that one go, Alicia…

  40. Kingnitro

    Sure is a cutie! Is she half black? Sure looks it…

  41. nijen

    it’s called a pelvic bone…and hers is just a little bigger

  42. egar

    i’d love to shove my nose right up her ass and take a good, long whiff.

  43. carlos

    holly cow she is fat

  44. Jemma

    DEAR ALICIA, PLEASE USE A TAMPON WHEN YOURE PLANNING TO WEAR THOSE PANTS. A JUMBO SIZE MAXIPAD WILL NOT WORK WITH SOFT MATERIALS.

    Honestly, all girls know this, and that freakishly bulgning crotchaction shes got going on there is definetly, definetly a maxi pad. You can see it from behind too because her butt kind of looks like shes wearing a diaper.

  45. Whaaaaa

    I wouldn’t have worn that coochie suit, but she doesn’t look bad at all. She’s pretty and she’s got a good figure.

    However… I fucking HATE her personality. She acts like she’s the coolest person in the world, like she’s better than everyone, but tries to act like she’s down to earth when you know off-camera she’s a huge bitch like Jennifer Hudson and Mariah. YEAH– Jennifer Hudson is a fucking snot-nosed, acting-like-she’s-better-than-everyone-and-like-she’s-not-fat BITCH.

  46. jackass

    god is that bitch ugly… she has those hideous beyonce-riahnna-like tree trunk legs

  47. jackass

    god is that bitch ugly… she has those hideous beyonce-riahnna-like tree trunk legs

  48. is she still a single? someone posted on yahoo answers that she has an
    profile on an online site sugarmommymeet.. you know it is a site for rich women to
    seek young cute men.. what a slur!

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