The Skarsgard Seed Is Strong

“On three, we find the nearest clinic and vacuum these things out of us.”

If Alexander Skarsgard is the true Nordic God of Sex-Thunder and not some Australian facsimile with delicious abs who foolishly got married and sired a child the second he made it big with his delicious abs, then his father Stellan Skarsgard is Odin, The All-Fucker, who forged his son’s mythical weapon with his own two hands and I’m not just saying that because I saw The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo and now think the Swedish are the type of people who’d mold their kids’ penises into shapes. Completely unrelated. THR reports:

Skarsgard, 61, has become a father for the eighth time on Friday, a rep for the actor confirms to The Hollywood Reporter.
The child, a healthy boy, was born to wife Megan Everett in Stockholm. The couple shares one other child, three-year-old son Ossian.
The other six children — Alexander, Gustaf, Sam, Bill, Valter and Eija — come from Skarsgard’s previous marriage to My Skarsgard.

So remember earlier when I accurately predicted the birth of Snooki’s son would doom us all to perish in a tornado of AIDS? What I meant was unless Skarsgard the 8th here doesn’t bang said tornado into the sun (And I don’t see why he wouldn’t.), so hopefully nobody killed themselves in a fit of depression since I wrote that post. I probably should’ve got around to this sooner, you’re right.

Photos: Getty