Alexander Skarsgard’s Quest is Equal Opportunity Now, Gentlemen?

August 11th, 2011 // 65 Comments

“Well, I was aiming for that traffic cone, but why not? Would you mind holding these binders I carry around for no apparent reason? We’re going to a place without words now…”

[Ed. Note: Legal just told me I have to include this song clip, or GLAAD can technically sue the site right out from under us. It sounded legitimate.]

Photos: Splash News


  1. Pippy Longcockings

    Christ, the greasy little fuck already has his shorts half unzipped for the mid crosswalk gobble!

    • Mariska

      Hey now…thats just Mario Lopez trying to get the latest interview with Christian Laettner.

      And whats with these bitches at the bottom of the comments? Carrie, cc, meh…thats why you converse here. NO ONE likes a bitch that runs her mouth about THE DUMBEST SHIT in the world..and keeps on and on and on and on and on etc about it. You chubbies sound like 13 yr olds at a NKOTB backstage blowhard.

      Now get back to work or go rub one out and get over it.

      Dont forget to use the antiseptic wipe on you Mary Jane Rottencrotch

  2. sam

    first i think

  3. Carrie

    Holy shit, that song was totally worth pausing my favorite grooveshark playlist. Fan-fucking-tastic!
    That being said, I love myself some A.S. I don’t care if his list of things he couldn’t live without included Asian baby heads mounted to his wall. He’s that sexy.

  4. Cock Dr

    How tall IS vampyre pinhead?
    And what’s the gender on the short fella?

  5. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a guy or Joan Jett’s dwarvish sister?

  6. Leigh

    Look at Pippy’s comment, lol

  7. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Alex! Is he brown, Alex?!?”

  8. Maeby

    Those are the shitty binders too. Those are like $0.67 at Target. What a poor!

  9. meh

    UGH what s the deal with this tall turd. I do no get the appeal at all. Maybe being a Swede myself I see no mystique in my own people. He looks like he thinks he’s too good looking to need regular showers. Also he just makes me miss the hoteness that was that dude from the princess bride, who was so hot and now is old.

    • Carrie

      That guy still isn’t hard to look at. . . .

      • meh

        True but remember what he was. Even as a little girl I was like “who is THAT gorgeous man?”

      • Carrie

        Oh yeah, I had a hardcore crush on him when the movie came out. Robin Hood: Men in Tights was on the other night and I sat there drooling. He hasn’t aged as well as some, but he’s still pretty handsome.

      • meh

        Agreed loved men in tights mainly for him. If you haven’t already, as I rambled below, you should introduce yourself to Gale Harold. The man is not fit for this world. It’s almost cruel how hot he is.

      • Carrie

        Oh yeah, I googled him. He’s crazy hot. . . .I love dark-haired guys far better than blonds.

      • meh

        He sure is. You need to go to youtube to watch some videos of him. In action he makes his pictures look like Gilbert Godfried.

    • cc

      You haven’t seen my Swedish niece. And her friends.

      Holy flirking shnit they are all smoking hot.

      • meh

        Swedish girls are another story. We Swedish ladies take care of ourselves. Swedish boys look like Brad Pitt with low testosterone.

      • Carrie

        Swedish girls are hot. I bartended on a Greek Island once and the Swedish and Danish girls were enough to make me consider trying out for the other team.

      • who dat

        So true Carrie!! If any girl could cause me to swich teams it would be a Swede!

  10. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    “dat ass”!

  11. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “….and this is where I’m planning on ambushing you outside your house.”

  12. meh

    You knobs that’s his ex Kate Bosworth she changed her hair and he isn’t having it.

  13. Ron

    That little guy looks like Brüno’s little pygmy lover.

  14. Eeo

    Ugh he is so fine!

  15. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    The Pope
    Commented on this photo:

    God help us if this guy and Rhianna ever hook up and have a kid.

  16. Richard McBeef

    still don’t know who this douchehat is other than another one of the SW’s fantasies.

  17. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    so Hayden Panettiere got a new haircut and a new man.

  18. Minky Wail

    Gayest Abbey Road ever.

  19. meh

    If you girls and boys want to see a FINE man google GALE HAROLD and then watch him in queer as folk on youtube. Even the straightest man in the world would get confused by him. As a straight girl he makes me feel like a little gay boy inside which is what every Disney fairytale taught me straight love is supposed to feel like.

    Superfish get me some GALE HAROLD pics already. I have been very patient with your butterfaced fascination with Blake Lively as we all have and now that she’s been stamped by the Dicaprio she’ll never touch a man who isn’t worth billions again so it’s safe to say you can move on maybe even go Gay for Gale Harold which I would never judge you for since’s he’s far prettier than Lively anyway.

  20. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Sweenis McFrecklenut
    Commented on this photo:

    Its that little gay dude from bruno !

  21. sc4play

    That ain’t a gentleman, it’s JAILBAIT!!

  22. Pretty sure that little person is a lesbian. Or WAS a lesbian until she cast her eyes skyward and saw the light that is A-Skar. Alexander Skarsgard: Now curing “the gay”. Maybe he’ll be Michele Bachmann’s running mate.

  23. PoorMaryKelly

    Man? That’s Vanessa Hudgins.

  24. Venom

    I don’t know what that thing is on the left, so I will refuse to comment at this point.

  25. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet he’s carrying the Ring in that satchel there.

  26. Tie your fucking shoes, you lazy Skarsgard.

  27. jck

    I actually only read this website now for the daily Skarsgard posts.

  28. the one

    *SSKISSERS & BLOWJOBBERS enough in america

  29. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me introduce you to my sister, Cuntswaylo.

  30. kulit

    He has that stupid old man face. I just can’t understand why so many people salivate over this guy. Now if you look at Khal Drogo/Jason Momoa’s pic over at other article, now that is a beautiful man, despite the ugly outfit and stupid bowler hat.

  31. salavation

    ‘this type of question is known as a Skarsgardian…”Does a street elf make better tips than a mime?”

  32. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:


  33. Dr Ha-Ha

    I’m now getting as sick of this guy as I am Lady Gaga.

  34. Alexander Skarsgard NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    That little boy was just looking to catch a ride on the reading rainbow.

    Of cock.

    PS. If mister A.S. wants to tap a man ass, I will donate mine for the protection of all that is sacred in this world. Also, hot damn.

  35. celebsloveme

    And this picture combined with that song is why I will always come back to this blog despite being regularly offended by it. Total genius.

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