Alexander Skarsgard Vill Break You

August 25th, 2011 // 74 Comments

(Yes, I know he’s Swedish. For God’s sake, his middle name is Johan Hjalmar which means only Thor can wield him)

Also, fun fact, today’s the Skarsgards birthday, so if you’re trying to think of a good gift to get him, pussy. He likes pussy. All kinds, as we now know: Ass-pussy, lightpole-pussy, traffic cone-pussy. If it’s got a hole, “I will strudel it,” is something I imagine him saying because I’ve honestly got nothing in the way of Swedish jokes, and aren’t all Europeans basically the same disco poonhound anyway? Yes. Yes, they are.

Photo: Splash News


  1. Jillia

    I think someone has a little crush….

    • Mrs. T

      Exactly. Photo Bitch & Fish have a hard on for this shitty actor.

      The Superficial – Because You’re Gay

      • taim

        its my first time on this site and I have already regretted it, it seems that here are posting just a bunch of women (housewives or teenagers) who are talking absolutely crap; you judge and actor even though you haven´t seen his other work, so just stfup!!! He is a very good actor and definitely one of the better ones of True Blood; Paquins accent on the show is bad….

    • could be getting that way. he mentioned skar’s birthday before realizing it’s blake lively’s too~

  2. Frank Burns

    This guy again?

  3. Lolerskates

    love the skars. such a beefcakeee.

  4. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Your daily Skars posts fill me with happiness. I hope one day there is reason to include a Lionel Richie song.

  5. Roberta


  6. velvetroom

    Haha. He’s a Virgo! The worst sign in the sex sack.

  7. forrest gump

    ……..he has a vagina, folks?

  8. I’d pee in his butt.

  9. Jade

    Why is this guy getting featured on every single page? He’s not even that famous or that good looking for a celebrity.

    • it's me fuckers

      I would love to have a chance to lick this man from head to toe. My quim is just quivering looking at him. I think I need some more ‘alone’ time… ;-)

      • TomFrank

        ^^And THAT’S why he gets a post every day. The Superficial is going to milk Alexander Skarsgård for all he’s worth to his female readership, just like the above commenter will be milking her quim to him. Or whatever it is that women do to their quims; I don’t really know.

    • taim

      you havebn´t even seen any of his photoshootings, not every actor you now looks like a super model in real life, they always get photoshopped doesn´t matter who;
      And he is extemely good looking.

  10. kimmykimkim

    Fish, this is starting to get a little weird.

    • this guy i get, between true blood and gen kill. it’s the beiber obsession i’m concerned about..

      • Richard McBeef

        pretty obvious this guy has ran all the way up to hilt in the superficial writer’s willing butt. photoboy has the photos to prove it and when the revolution comes, photoboy will use them in his first post declaring the coup a success.

  11. fap

    He has male version of cameltoe in every pic

  12. steve

    Nice package.

    I love this – Fish causing commenter distress by arousing repressed homoerotic desires. It’s a nice break from all the tiresome nonsense about “real women with curves”.

  13. Sophia

    off he is all man

    I dont even like muscly men

  14. Kelce

    Everyone leave Fish alone. He’s doing the right thing here.

  15. youbetcha

    I’d give myself as a present to him for his birthday for suresies!

  16. marceelf

    How about a pic of his birthday sausage. He is packing down below. What a fucking stud.

  17. Cock Dr

    I confess I would click on naked pics of this guy.
    I would make fun of course, but I would look.

  18. I like him because he looks just like me.

    Except with muscles.

    And a full head of hair.

    And 5 year old girls.

  19. want meds

    he can break me over the chair, on the kitchen table, across the desk . . .

  20. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Guy Smiley
    Commented on this photo:

    dude, what the hell is up with your obsession of this guy? the jokes well has run dry

  21. Can

    LOLZ @ Du Hast

  22. Bringbackbabalu

    The funny thing is Fish didnt start talking about him until they started the 5 week fuck marathon between him and Sookie…we dont even see so much as a tit from Sookie though…kinda weird if you ask me

  23. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I think my team members here are tired of listening to me blast that nice bit of music provided on this post.
    Tuned down power chords with guttural unintellible lyrics always appreciated.

  24. Swedish Chef

    Börk Börk Börk!

  25. Lisa

    You can basically see his abs and junk already, so why is he even wearing clothes?

  26. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Kitten karloso
    Commented on this photo:

    Break me off a piece of that!

  27. RandaI


  28. wtf

    “…I will strudel it…” now THAT was funny.

    du hast mich HAHAHHAHA

  29. Yon

    I will break you was said by Dolph Lundgren…also Swedish.

  30. Beck

    Daily Askars posts are heavenly, and is he getting better looking each day?

  31. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus, looks like Alex has got a whole junk yard up in them pants!


    • browny

      Um, I am speechless. I am without speech. I, I, um, omg, who KNEW????? who knew??? He had this happening down there? ME. WANT.

  32. Frenchgal

    Wow, that bulge ! The things I would do to that man… Alexander, I know some other ladies in Paris who agree with me, care to come visit the french capital soon ?

    • browny

      Not until after his trip to Australia. Alexander, I can see it ALL now. Plenty of action down here in OZ. Your degree from Leeds University just adds to the package. We can sit on my bed and do the Sunday crossword, talk about world events, discourse about the parlous state of world economics and then…discuss the philosophy of getting your gear off… and um, well, you know….


  33. celebsloveme

    That man is not only smart and a damn good actor but really, really, ridiculously good looking. Those of you complaining about all the pics of him need to SHUT UP and let the ladies enjoy themselves. For once.

  34. Lo

    I would make him my sexy vampire husband… yes, yes i would.

  35. Freebie

    He is one tall beautiful hunk of man.

  36. Alixia

    I feel sad that a man THIS sexy is all alone at the gym on his 35th birthday. However, seeing that he is packing some serious junk makes me feel better! Bless you, daily Skarsgard posts and may you continue..

  37. b

    ahahaha fish ur such a moron :D

  38. June

    Disco poonhound! Also, this picture is porn.

  39. ~LoveASkars~


  40. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:


  41. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    is it just my imagination, but is this northern euro american really blessed?

  42. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Ana Carolina
    Commented on this photo:

    yeah hot package YUM

  43. Alexander Skarsgard Workout Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Please teach the rest of these internet hooligans how to write and reescrah!

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