Alessandra Ambrosio is a hot mama – literally

January 29th, 2008 // 120 Comments

Victoria’s Secret model Alessandra Ambrosio had a photo shoot this weekend in South Beach. I should also mention she’s three months pregnant. Normally, the sight of a pregnant woman makes me want to change my name, grow a moustache and flee to the Rockies. (If anyone asks, my name is Adam F. Thundernads.) But, today, I’m going to make an exception with Alessandra and ignore my natural, sharply honed reflexes. Maybe it’s because I’m starting to mature as an adult or perhaps it’s because she’s wearing a bikini. I’m not really sure. But I’d put money on the bikini – and a lot of it.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin

  1. HoHwPoV


  2. Miranda Kerr


  3. first


  4. Laudanum

    Not “first”

  5. granada

    Who’s the father?

  6. granada

    And is she Brazilian?

  7. Cindy

    She’ll be way up to 113 lbs by the end of her pregnancy.

  8. cvcvcvccvc


  9. unicornzrawk

    #7 that was funny! haha

  10. Gross. She needs to scrape the baby out if she wants to keep wearing bikinis.

  11. theShizaan

    Alessandra, I’m ready to take the paternity test now.

  12. Judd

    I love the photo with her feet up in the air. Now, if I could just get her in my bed like that, I’d be a happy boy. For some strange reason, I get the idea that her puss smells like day old taco’s.

  13. winslow

    She looks like she’s thinking “what’s that smell???”

  14. SexyV

    What I find amusing is the guys who think she’ll be gross after having a baby, when they would all give their left nut, and possibly the right, to be the one to knock her up.

  15. D. Richards (Blaspheme.)

    Alessandra doesn’t even look pregnant. I guess that’s what happens when you don’t eat and barely are able to grow a fetus. God, I hate children.

    Pregnant mothers are hot though. When they’re ripe with another man’s child, of course. The thought of a woman carrying a child fathered by me would hardly be arousing for myself, nor the underage mother.

    And why do Ambrosio’s legs look retarded?

  16. Sam

    “What I find amusing is the guys who think she’ll be gross after having a baby, when they would all give their left nut, and possibly the right, to be the one to knock her up.”

    What’s amusing about that? Love ‘em and leave ‘em. We all want to do it. Black guys do it all the time (it’s in their less complicated DNA).

  17. Ted from LA

    I am. We had a nice box of wine, one thing lead to another and BAM, I’m going to be a daddy. We’re very excited. Thanks for all the well wishes (accept those of you calling her a whore and claiming her pussy stinks like tacos).

  18. Murderrock

    I don’t care because I threw out my back.

    It’s amazing how the impulse to rut just disappears into thin air when you’re in pain. Alessandra Ambrosio could be doing calisthenics in a thong right next to me and I’d just snap, “Get a job, loser.” And I’ve never worked a day in my life.

    Oh, my aching back.

  19. Hot Pocket

    VS needs to start a maternity line and have her (and other hot preggo models) model it! Pregnant women are beautiful!!!!! All of you a holes who think otherwise are crazy. None of you would be here if it were not for someone giving birth to you. Now, grow a pair and stop complaining. She’ll still be hot after the baby comes. When is Jaime going to propose?

  20. Janie

    When the stretch marks come she’s be so mad at that baby! Kid’s gonna get slammed into the wall a dozen times in the first month. LMAO!

  21. I wonder what it’s like to give birth to someone the EXACT same weight and bra size as you…

  22. misery bunny

    what happened to her virginity? wasn’t she the VS model who was waiting for marriage?

  23. Guy

    Poppy droopy pants

  24. mrs.t

    Models get their assistants to gain the wait and the stretchmarks-duh. Did you think she was going to turn into an Eater?

  25. mrs.t

    #22-No, that’s the other one, with the dark hair. Why the fuck do I know this? I’m going to help my kids with their homework like a normal parent.

  26. Ted from LA

    It was the box of wine… pay attention.

  27. misery bunny

    thanks. i’m so sad. i was hoping for another virgin birth story, and more state and federal holidays.

  28. Ted, I’ll drink a box of wine with you…

    #15, even though I hate you, that was um… funny..

  29. pointandlaugh

    my GOD is she incredible!!!!!! so so so HOT

  30. mr sensitive

    I’d slip a crushed RU486 into her drink then set up a second date for a week later.

  31. j-sin

    @ #16: Kiss my ass


    Black guy.

  32. #25 Mrs. T. Don’t do it, you are enabling your kids!!!

    God I hate snow days….

  33. j-sin's dad

    Son, is that really you?!! I haven’t seen you since you were born!

  34. stumbler

    #16, stop hating on YOURSELF! We all know that the hate you project is in direct alignment for the hate you have for yourself… but still you try to feel bigger about yourself by talking trash about others…. how unevolved you are… babe, we are all many steps ahead of you. Stop boring us.

    In other (way more important and far exceedingly more intelligent) news… she looks HOTT in her bikini. Not my favorite model but not bad, not bad….

  35. #25 Mrs. T. Don’t do it, you are enabling your kids!!!

    God I hate snow days….

  36. havoc


    I’d drink her bath water…….


  37. Jason

    #34 – thanks, Oprah

  38. p0nk

    I think I speak for all guys here when I say that I’d love to spurt a huge load of salty ropey semen all over her face right at the climax of her abortion procedure.

  39. This site needs mainenance, I NEVER comment twice. It said it didn’t even go through. That’s it me and my brother are OUT OF HERE!!!!!!!

  40. Summer Kat

    Not fair. Not fucking fair!

  41. Summer Kat

    Not fair. Not fucking fair!

  42. CruisingForCock

    I had sex with her once and she farted. True story.

  43. Ismani

    I did ATM with her once and afterwards it looked like she had a mustache. But not as prominent as the one she had before putting on makeup the next morning.

  44. @39, yeah, I can’t even spell anymore. Time to figure out how to spell free porn on my google.

    God I love porn

  45. Googlybits

    I wonder if being ridiculously underweight in the early stages of the pregnancy is considered healthy. I’m pro-choice, but I think she’s being selfish if there’s an increased risk of miscarriage from being undernourished- most models have BMIs way below a normal 20-25.

  46. #43 I went to the ATM once and afterwards it looked like I had money in my hand. But not as prominent as the money I had the next morning..

  47. What I wanna know is how will she know if she’s giving birth or shitting out a pea?

  48. Rat

    You are dead to me now!


    First 100 spaces FREE!

    Be a part of the 10000 Smiley Faces Community, upload your photo and raise your blog visits.

  50. gotmilk?

    yeah her knees are disgusting in picture #9. might want to see someone about that.

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