Akon goes nuts

April 19th, 2007 // 197 Comments

Akon performed at Zen nightclub in Port of Spain last Thursday and managed to con some girls into dancing on stage by telling them they were entering a contest to win a trip to Africa. And somehow that little ruse turned into the above video of him dry humping a 14-year-old girl on stage. I’m just glad he kept it tasteful, because there’s so many ways this could’ve come off poorly.

Thanks to everybody that sent this in.


  1. Mr. Neutron

    Dudes, the reason Imus gets dragged into this item is simple: he got fired for a pretty lame remark that was supposedly so devastating to the basketball girls (none of whom had ever heard of Imus before) and black girls/women everywhere. If what he said was poisonous to young women of color, what the hell is this? Some kind of mega-poison?

  2. fergernauster

    I was mildly aroused, surprisingly.

    Am I going to jail?

  3. StoneRose

    By the way, what if your sister/cousin was wearin’ heels, tight jeanz, a fly top, an’ make up? Would that be reason for Akon to decide to go on up and bang da juice outta her? Even if buddy waz jus fakin’? That’s right guy. You wouldn’t like dat. You’d be pissed as hell at that fucka and wanna give him a piece of yo mind.

    And in the meantime, I’d be a fuckin’ your sista, the one you call a ho cauze she be wearin’ slutty heels, tight jeanz, and ho make up. That’s right. I am one Hip Oh Kritt baby, yeah.

  4. whitegold

    #89 – it’s nice that you think “sparkles” needs to shut the fuck up and all, but don’t you think, just maybe, that nobody gives a shit what you think about this person whom you have never met? What gives you the right to conjecture about absolute stranger’s opinions? While websites like PerezHilton.com and TheSuperficial.com may mock celebrities, they do not sit around and tell people posting on their site to shut the hell up. So SHUT THE HELL UP. This thread was created to talk about AKON and his rather graphic entertainment tactics, not some commentor whose comments you don’t agree with. (sound familiar? now I’m not saying there is a problem with bashing other people, I just think it’s funny that you bashed someone for doing basically what you’re doing to them)

    #90 – Wow you sound like a dickhead! You must really think you’re something special, don’t you? Thing is, whether your really special or just making shit up, nobody on here really cares to hear about your BS ego.

    #98 – I’m glad you know what the fuck you’re talking about, because I don’t think anyone else has any clue?!

    Today just seems to be one of those days…

  5. ImaCracka


    I bet Akon owns the complete RKelly collection….

    What a fool………

  6. murmurzz

    @77 GG Allin and the word “class” do not belong in the same sentence. The world may implode … please be more careful next time.

    I know this is a superficial website (hence the title), but some of you people really piss me off. She was THERE and she dressed like THAT, so she deserved it? Really? REALLY, really??? I hope that those of you that say these things are joking because otherwise that’s truly frightening.

    That video grosses me out.

  7. fergernauster

    I would tend to agree that he would likely not be stellar in bed.

    He jerks and twitches like a rabid tree monkey with ticks.

  8. littlefattycakes

    #103: Thanks. That was exactly my point. And since this thread is obviously never going back to the point, Akon’s graphic behavior, I guess we can continue to disuss the girl.

    #104: I wasn’t bashing anyone, and if you can point to any phrase where I spoke negatively about a particular person, I will leave off. I, for one, did not call anyone a slut, a whore, an idiot, or anything else. I was simply trying to convey the point that this was not posted for everyone to discuss a girl’s outfit and how that automatically makes her a moral-less tramp.

    Now, if Jessica Simpson wears tight jeans, a midriff-baring topic, and spike heels, does anyone call her a slut? Does anyone jump on her at a concert and dry hump her?

  9. bellasera

    go #14!!!! you are so right!

    the double standard is sickening! The entire week that Imus was being crucified for buying into a genre, where the fuck was Jesse and Al when in Naperville, IL, at Nequea Valley High School, a black teacher beat a black student for dating a white girl? Think I’m lying? Google it.

    I have nothing against African American people. What I have a problem with is any member of any group that lets their own individual egos get in the way of what the group is really there for. Fuck this shit.

  10. fergernauster

    What’s saddest of all is that the chick he was mock-banging likely felt somewhat of a celebrity afterwards.

  11. BarbadoSlim

    Hey, if you wanna make this little ho’ into your poster child for black hypocrisy be my guest. But the facts are: 1. she’s there 2. she obviously enjoys this thug’s music and lifestyle 3. she’s dressed like she wants it.

    Do you really want to portray her as a victim?

  12. Imus–glad your old,ugly ass got fired…you meant every word you said,,your a man,,I am a white girl, and Imus is just like all those old bastards..woman hater…Glad your fired, but I think I lost some of my rights ,because of you….AMERICA,,,WE CAN TRASH ANYONE,,BIG FFF NNNN DEAL..

  13. whitegold

    #108 – umm, you said that nobody gives a shit about what they think and told them to shut the hell up. I don’t know about you and your definition of speaking negatively about someone, but I’m pretty sure that telling someone that nobody gives a shit about their opinion on this topic and then telling them to shut the hell up is pretty negative speaking. One might even say you were bashing them.

    So does this mean you’re going to leave off?

  14. Me No Know

    I’m at work so I’m not even going to venture clicking on this for fear of being fired. But I do recall on “Best Week Ever” they showed this sleazoid dry humping the f$%k out of the Tara Reid. Actually he did a gang dryhump (who knew that was even possible). It was him in the front and some loser in the back and they bounced Tara like a ping-pong ball. What’s worse is she had the good sense to be disturbed. When a skank like Tara Reid gets weirded out by being humped by two pervs, you know there’s a problem. Nasty bastard.

  15. heyheyhey

    #14 “imus calls a ho a ho”

    uhh…he called college student-athletes hoes for no reason. ugh, i’m not even gonna start with that, cuz you’re an idiot.

    but yeah, I dunno wtf akon thought he was doing. my favorite is how he just gets up and walks away as she lays there

  16. BarbadoSlim

    “Now, if Jessica Simpson wears tight jeans, a midriff-baring topic, and spike heels, does anyone call her a slut? Does anyone jump on her at a concert and dry hump her”

    Nettiquete rule #1 familiarize yourself first with a site then, think about opening your filthy piehole.

    If you knew anything about this place you’d know Jessica S. is nothing but a filthy Papa Joe screwing whore.

  17. Sparkles13

    littlefattycakes…dear heart, though his behavior may be deplorable, makes no difference because the participant is indeed willing…
    Otherwise, it’s just some nutjob running around shirtless thrusting the floor. Which subsequently, isn’t as interesting because there’s no protagonist.
    Watch the beging of the clip, you see she’s already there waiting for him. She then wraps her legs around him. From her actions in addition to her choice of attire, I can deduct that she indeed enjoyed that and the attention she recieved from the crowd. His actions are no more depraved than that of the insecure female, seeking attention with unimaginative revealing clothing and trying to validate herself with how well men respond to her looks. Basically, there are no victims in this…everyone was happy to oblige.

  18. heyheyhey

    111-man, you’re trippin. and i notice whenever a post involves black people, you’re alarmingly critical and ignorant in everything you say.

    1–she’s there. yeah, so what, I might’ve gone too if I felt like buying tickets. So would a lot of suburban white kids. That doesn’t make them “thugs” and waiting to get publicly dry humped

    2–yeah, she enjoys his MUSIC. see how his lifestyle and sexual behaviors are not included in the word “music”?? Plenty of people enjoy songs just for the song’s sake…not cuz they’re standin up for everything the artist does in his personal life.

    3–she’s really not dressed any differently than every other girl I’ve seen going to a concert. hardly dressed like a slut.

    chill the fuck out

  19. velveethra

    What in the holy old hell has happened to this site? Jesus christ.

  20. bungoone

    i’m pretty sure his music (and i use this term loosely because i’ve heard the shit this guy puts out & it’s garbage) shouldn’t be listened to by 14 year olds, if in fact she’s 14. and if she is, then yes, she is dressed sluttily.

  21. BarbadoSlim

    @118 what the fuck do you think this site is for?

    And yeah, I’m sure “music” is the first thing that comes to mind with Akon and his ilk. And I know more “african americans” than you asshole. Figure it out.

  22. anothershityear

    #104 by my own comment i’m not sure whether i knew what i was talking about that was kind-of what i meant if you got what i meant

    being at shit-fucking work i’ll just assume the anger is boiling in me, and i just had an outburst without any real structure or meaning to it

    thanks for pointing out i’m writing like a fucking idiot whitegold
    every chance i get i’ll return the favor

    when exactly did you become this site’s H. L. Mencken?

    and btw why the hell do you have something against putting a little libertarianism into the superficial discussion?
    beats the war-machine / welfare-machine paradigm any day

  23. StoneRose

    So, Barbado,

    If yo mamma wuz 1) at a Dwight Yokam concert an’ 2) waz wearin’ a ten gallon hat wit dem purty little cowgurl boots an’ 3) enjoyin’ da western lifestyle, does dat mean I can dry hump yer trampy little mama, cuz man, she wuz askin’ fer it. SQUEEEAAALL!

  24. BarbadoSlim

    @124…did I tell her to go to a Yokam concert, her? That’d be her problem, I figure the music alone would be enough trauma.

    That momma shit don’t work on me son. She was a dirty whore.

  25. Back when I was in the Stones (rather, back when I used to shoot heroin with Keith and drink backstage at all their shows), I dry humped a fourteen year old girl.

    She still can’t walk.

  26. StoneRose

    Aha. I rest my case.

    And its ‘Miss’ to you, boy.

  27. Ruby

    That was you, Jack?? All I wanted were a few autographs…. and for Mick to stick his tongue down my throat.

  28. littlefattycakes

    #116: Yes, I’ve been reading this site for about a year now, and I’m very familiar with how people interact here. I don’t think that any of my comments have strayed out of the realm of “normal” or “commonplace” for Superfish.

    And sure, people are certainly entitled to their own opinions, but I just have a difficult time understanding how any of you people can sit there and say, “She was dressed minimimally; therefore, she DESERVED to be humped.” If she wanted to be up there, good for her, she got what she wanted. If she didn’t want to be up there, that sucks for her and Akon shouldn’t have done that. All I want to know is, if a random girl wears revealing clothes, does she deserve to be called a whore by hundreds of people who don’t know her? (I know that people call celebrities sluts all the time for the way they dress, but celebrities know that’s the way the media works–you become a celebrity and people criticize your every move.)

    And hey, I can’t really tell from the video if that girl wanted to be up there being humped or not, I’m just saying, who’s to say? I think that StoneRose gets the point…

  29. s0fa

    and people ask why I dont listen to this kind of music. this guy should get sued

  30. StoneRose

    Question: why don’t you all try dressing like a ‘slut’. You too, Barbados. Go out to the nearest corner, and wait for it…*honk* Ah. That’s what you’ll hear. Sweet approval. There’s only one thing worse than being *honk*ed at, and that’s not being *honk*ed at. There, secret of the universe revealed. Now go back home and pull on that same pair of grimy jogging pants and sweatshirt and hang out at the ‘fish watering hole and spread the good cheer.

  31. BarbadoSlim

    @126 oh are we in court? And I’ll call you whatever I feel like calling you, you sound like a lesbo to me, so son is more than appropriate.

    As for the rest of this argument, LOOK she was not dragged on stage, she got up there willingly. She was also dressed in a manner that can be interpreted as imitative of what what you see on the videos the these people put out. So I believe and it is MY FUCKING OPINION that she was a willing little skank. Not a victim. This is not about poor Imus getting fired(I actually listened and watched Imus EVERY day, there’s a lot of people coming out of the woodwork that weren’t even fans, I’m a fan of the man and his good works for children and veterans) or Jesse and Al’s hypocrisy. It’s about two people who don’t even matter.
    Those would be this Akon and his suburban little skank.

  32. BarbadoSlim

    Oh, and I’m done with this thread lesbos, good luck with your next Lillith Fair or, whatever it is you do besides munching rug.

    PS;You need to pick your causes better, this one’s a loser.

  33. HollyJ



  34. backstabbath

    Can someone provide a new link?

  35. HollyJ

    If anyone knows where I can go online to see this crap (other than YouTube obviously), I’d be much appreciative =)

  36. twinklejelly

    Jesus fucking Christ, I’d sooner witness more Paris/LiLo/Britters crotch shots than that.

    This guy is as talentless and deluded as they come – even by the standards within the rap community, and that can’t be easy. He is also absolutely EVERYWHERE, with his relentless nasal whine about women and life in the ghetto and general crap.

    Fuck, I’d forgotten how much I hate this guy.

  37. woodhorse

    #14, #52 you both are super hot and genuine. Barbado Slim you ignorant slut. Were you never 14 with a 14 year old’s judgement? Maybe you never even got that far apparently. You never sneaked out of the house at 14, and of course you have never been taken unfair advantage of by anyone (except Wally, who is brilliant so we adore him when he takes adavantage). BTW, Barbado Slim, are you wearing penny loafers with a mumu again? I told you that didn’t match….

  38. StoneRose

    Hahaha. Lesbo? Is that what you called yo mamma? That’s right, I’ve got bigger shitheads to fry than you. Good luck with the next beer can you crush on your cro-magnon skull, you moron. Men everywhere cringe in shame to be associated with your gender, if in fact you are a ‘man’, homo.

  39. woodhorse

    Akon should be a registered sex offender. And then somebody should let their ill-mannered German Shepard hump his leg.

  40. twinklejelly

    I think we’re losing sight of the real issue hee, which is that there are people in that audience seemingly watching an Akon concert of their own free will. Most of them paid for this using actual money. Let’s let that register for a moment.

    And how bad is it when you produce noise pollution like Akon’s, ha, “music” and you can’t even reproduce that level of suckiness on stage and need a backing tack?

  41. iamsosmrt


    #1. He is a felon who has spent 5 years in jail
    #2. He was a drug Dealer
    #3. He owns a conflict diamond mine
    #4. He is a Polygamist and has three wives

    He is a greedy filthy piece of shit. I lived in Africa for years and the worst treatment of the impoverished people there was not the discusting racist whites( which was bad enough) but the worst treatmnent was from rich black who treat the poor like their slaves and use them like dogs to increase their wealth. Akon is a prime example. He is filth. Now you can add pedophile to his impressive list.

  42. iamsosmrt

    *a total of 5 years

  43. iamsosmrt

    *rich blacks who treat the poor like their slaves

    Can’t make any spelling mistakes because some poindexter with a lap pinky or some Rosie O’Fatty will come and corect me and I can’t stand that shit.

    Pedophiles always stick up for other pedophiles. I’m sure many grown adult men on this website did the same thing to a fourteen year old girl last week. See you on 20/20 with your pants around you ankles, you know who you are fuckers.

  44. CutterJon


    They will come and “correct” you, I think you meant.

    It took me awhile because I had my pants around my ankles.

    – Poindexter

  45. superficially


    SHE’S 14 YEARS



    HER ‘WEBSITE’ IS : deevybaby.hi5.com


  46. BarbadoSlim

    Just a quick pop-in to give you a link to your victim, turns out she’s not even white so you can stop giving a fuck now.

    Anyway here’s your victim slash slut.(scroll down)


    Oh yeah, it must’ve been horrible…

  47. viajero

    I saw this one already and this guy Akon is gross. I’m so sure that girl could do anything to stop that. That is so embarassing.

  48. viajero

    #101 oh yeah those basketball girls were so devastated by being called a name by some stupid ugly old guy who is not even in sports but they call each other that all the time. Even in high school teams call each other worse names than that and it is not devastating. Maybe you would be devastated if Clay Aiken called you a name.

  49. iamsosmrt

    If she’s 14, he’s a pedophile plain and simple. That’s the way the law works fuckers. She could be wearing nothing and come on to you but if she’s 14 and you’re a 25 year old mentally retarded, pathetic, uneducated loser douchebag it’s not leagal. Yep that bitch Akon is fucking 25 years old just like Britney Fucking Spears and if you’ve heard his unintelligent ass speak he’s about as fucking smart as her too. What a little fucking sissy, I bet he cried in jail just like Jo Francis. He obviously has the mental capacity of a hamster. No amount of fame and money will ever turn a worthless brainless turd into something that matters, he’s a waste of skin and I bet his parents think so too. His songs scream MY DADDY DIDN’T LOVE ME or maybe MY DADDY LOVED ME TOO MUCH… you POINDEXTERS know what that means don’t ya fat bitches.

  50. BarbadoSlim

    @149…hey asshole, is she wearing her fucking birth certificate on her forehead. She’s dressed like an adult and I’m pretty sure she’s not supposed to FUCKING EVEN BE THERE. That’s my point that’s supposed to be for adults.

Leave A Comment