Today’s battle for your nether-regions pits fictional movie star Vinnie Chase against fictional movie star Tom Cruise. (Not a typo.) For the sake of this experiment, we’re going to take some bold leaps and assume Tom is not just trying to convert you to Scientology with his tiny loving, and Adrian Grenier has showered in the past 24 hours. Or you can piss in the face of science and scream “Hugh Jackman!” It’s a free country. Ready GO!
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Courteney Cox's Shocking Confession About Her Sex Life – Huffington Post |
 Why Was This Celebrity Booed Off This Hit TV Show? – Fox News | |
| 50 Most Scandalous Cheerleaders in Sports History – Bleacher Report | |
| Skinny Star in a Bikini Talks About Being Anorexic – Evil Beet Gossip | |
| Sasha Grey keeps doing it for the kids. – TMZ | |
| Kate Middleton Steps Out On Her Own – Lainey Gossip |
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woodhorse | December 6, 2008 at 6:19 pm
$10 bucks on Tom Cruise takes the X man 1st round (but gives him a reach-around)
woodhorse | December 6, 2008 at 6:20 pm
Everybody below me also gets a Cruise reach around.
Al_Byno | December 6, 2008 at 6:35 pm
WTF!? These guys BOTH suck balls and take it up the pooper. They’ll probably just do it in a park somewhere and post it online as a fundraiser in support of Pooposition 8.
Ashers! | December 6, 2008 at 6:43 pm
Adrian is more my type by far.
tromba | December 6, 2008 at 6:47 pm
Who writes this garbage? I am guessing that this person DID NOT pay attention in English class.
Me | December 6, 2008 at 6:51 pm
Anyone posting after Me sucks on Adrian Grenier’s permed penis
tromba | December 6, 2008 at 6:52 pm
Hey Al_Byno, just a bit homophobic, maybe? I will go out on a limb and guess that you are, possibly, a racist and probably not very well educated.
Guy | December 6, 2008 at 6:52 pm
I don’t understand, what’s this meant to be about???
crazylady | December 6, 2008 at 6:53 pm
I’m going with Tom because I’m tall and so I feel like it would be angry sex.
tromba | December 6, 2008 at 6:56 pm
Dear “Me”,
Please explain how one “perms” a penis.
Yanz | December 6, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Grenier for the WIN! Cruise can’t handle it. Vinnie’s chiller than a polar bear meanwhile Tom would be too distracted by Chase’s gorg smile.
girl | December 6, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Vinnie Chase, he’s ugly but I like his show and he’d probably smoke me out
swampass | December 6, 2008 at 7:10 pm
Adrien fucked/is friends with Paris Hilton and said complementary things about her, so he is a FAIL.
Tommygirl is an instant FAIL.
“HUUUUUGE JACKMANNNNNN”
Yes, I went there.
unimposrtant | December 6, 2008 at 7:12 pm
Lindsay Lohan!!!!
wait… what?
tromba is gay | December 6, 2008 at 7:19 pm
try to relax dude, it’s a silly site with silly comments. Not a proper place to show how righteous and holier than thou you are. just for fun. dumbass.
huh? | December 6, 2008 at 7:22 pm
I don’t understand this post..
ileanita | December 6, 2008 at 7:23 pm
definetly adrien
dan1eya | December 6, 2008 at 7:25 pm
mmm VINCENT CHASE plzzzzzz
Samma | December 6, 2008 at 7:26 pm
…um…HUGH JACKMAN…wins everytime
Sparky | December 6, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Johnny Depp. yes, I said it.
/obvious
justifiable | December 6, 2008 at 7:38 pm
Both lameass spazzjacks. Hugh Jackman can phone it in any day of the week and beat these two.
Icky | December 6, 2008 at 7:44 pm
Is death an option?
Rough Daddy | December 6, 2008 at 7:56 pm
and the winner is ~~ROUGHERS~~
Gina Girl | December 6, 2008 at 8:05 pm
Tom Fooze!
Kelly | December 6, 2008 at 8:07 pm
hugh jackman. ftmfw
Kahlee | December 6, 2008 at 8:09 pm
eww neither! Adrian is kind of ugly and Tom Cruise is insane.
bitchen | December 6, 2008 at 8:12 pm
Neither. Gross. I would rather fuck a shovel.
tromba | December 6, 2008 at 8:14 pm
Dear “tromba is gay”,
Well, you would be wrong. I’ve been married for 20 years. As a timeline study, that precludes me from being married to another man. (Do the math, if you can) The last thing I am is righteous and as for “holier-than-thou”, I am agnostic.
I see nothing silly about hateful people making unfounded and disparaging remarks about other human beings. These asshats mean what they say regardless as how uninformed and uneducated as they are.
You are a homophobe as well and a disgusting human being.
Tanya | December 6, 2008 at 8:23 pm
Vinnie Chase, ill take him even is he hasnt showered. Tom Cruise is a crazy coked out lunatic…no competition there.
You're fucking dumb. | December 6, 2008 at 8:36 pm
Ew what the fuck?
Kimbo Sliced | December 6, 2008 at 8:37 pm
Nice Jew ‘fro, Adrien. You look like a goddamn ogre.
sarah | December 6, 2008 at 8:40 pm
Hugh Jackman!
Jeff W. | December 6, 2008 at 8:47 pm
Is it just me or is he not the spitting image of Greg Brady?
lulu | December 6, 2008 at 8:51 pm
if I had to choose between these two, it would definitely be Adrian. Tom Cruise is kinda weird and kinda short….I like tall guys :)
Cinnie | December 6, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Hugh Jackman, plz. AG and TC are both ick.
Rebecca | December 6, 2008 at 9:38 pm
Adrian likes Paris Hilton, and therefore probably got herpes from her, but Tom Cruise is just… Do I really have to explain? So, Hugh Jackman, hands down.
James | December 6, 2008 at 10:04 pm
come on how can you fault us or voting Jackman. We were asked to choose between a drunk probably herpes ridden douchemaster and a pale skeleton that doesn’t own a hairbrush. All while Jackman’s chest is staring at us from the side bar.
Here you try it. Who would you rather: Paris Hilton or Mary-Kate Olsen.
Now look at Jessica Alba’s cleavage over there. come on can you REALLY pick one of those other two now?
Oh and in this case… ugh god… uhm… ew.. Can i go with Jessica Alba actually? yeah no seriously i’d rather switch teams.
RaraAvis | December 6, 2008 at 10:16 pm
I’m joining the line that says I Don’t Understand This Post.
Mama Pinkus | December 6, 2008 at 10:18 pm
Nutty as he is, I’ll take Tom over that greasy fuck anyday
Aaamber007 | December 6, 2008 at 10:29 pm
Is this even a question?! Even without scientology and his weird, clearly asexual relationships with women whom he transforms into plastic mannequins, Tom Cruise hasn’t been even semi-attractive since Top Gun. Vinny Chase, with his pot-smoking, gonna-herpe-syphill-aids, still obviously the better choice.
britney's weave | December 6, 2008 at 10:39 pm
yeah, whoever said johnny depp is right on.
so if you need more suggestions for the GUYS… how about samantha ronson or khloe kardashian? since you’re obviously into impossible decisions…
Balls McCoy | December 6, 2008 at 10:45 pm
Adrian looks like he’s fresh out of the make-up chair on the set for the new Planet of the Apes movie? Now more ape-ier than ever!
Oh and tromba is a faggot.
ummm...yeah | December 6, 2008 at 11:06 pm
Oh please, both of them suck shit.
Who the fuck is this Vinnie guy anyway?
At least I know who Tom is…or was.
swampass | December 6, 2008 at 11:29 pm
BTW, what is up with that pic of Adrien???? Obviously, I’m no fan of his, but that picture is extrordinarily douchey. He’s grinning like some kind of psychotic listening to masturbatory voices. Is he coming out of a no-tell motel?
what the f*ck? | December 7, 2008 at 12:29 am
superficial are you drunk?
Heather | December 7, 2008 at 12:54 am
im going to hate myself for this one… but tom
i just think adrien is the ugliest man alive.
friendlyfires | December 7, 2008 at 1:21 am
I have an agreement with Cruise. I don’t discuss psychiatry and Prozac, he doesn’t discuss Scientology or his sex life. We like watching sports, Tales From The Far Side and The Three Stooges. And Ren & Stimpy. Works for me.
I almost forgot about Entourage. Do I give a shit about Adrian Grenier? That’s like asking if I care about who shares STDs with Elizabeth Cuthbert …
Hooray, People Magazine nominated a straight Ozzie that closet queens can drool over. That’s what I call a public service. Too bad us heteros have to contemplate Nicole Kidman, what the brudders call The Excuse For White Meat, Casper The Cold Unfriendly Ghost, The Shiver Stick, The Ice Hole, The Fortress Of Solitude.
Feel faint, where’s Victoria Secret catalogue? Thanks Rolf … ahh, real fake women, I feel myself again … and again … and again …
Siehna | December 7, 2008 at 1:59 am
Uh neitheir because that guy gives off that Joe Fransis vibe.
Tom Cruise, I guess…
Rachel | December 7, 2008 at 2:01 am
definitely vinnie chase, tom cruise is shorter than i am and im only 5″3
also its gotta be adrien grenier by default cuz he doesnt have any kids yet and lets face it who really wants to fuck a dad
Rachel | December 7, 2008 at 2:01 am
definitely vinnie chase, tom cruise is shorter than i am and im only 5″3
also its gotta be adrien grenier by default cuz he doesnt have any kids yet and lets face it who really wants to fuck a dad