And these photos should finish it off.
Yesterday, word got out that Abercrombie & Fitch had issued a press release Tuesday night offering to pay The Situation if he stopped wearing A&F clothes. It tarnishes “the aspirational nature of our brand,” they said because aspiration apparently means knocking back Red Bulls and ordering some “za” for an Entourage marathon now. It was a cute little publicity stunt that backfired once everyone started remembering A&F catalogs are basically Aryan child porn and with a target demo comprised entirely of douchecocks, The Situation should be their goddamn Jesus. And Wall St. agreed. TMZ reports:
… A day after Abercrombie & Fitch offered him and the other “Jersey Shore” cast members cash NOT to wear its clothes … the company’s stock plummeted 9%.
Abercrombie’s stock hit the new low today — the first trading session since the company offered Sitch and the cast substantial $$$ to stop wearing A&F-branded products.
Of course the stock fell. When your target demographic is absolute shitheads, alienating the most prominent one on the planet is like McDonald’s issuing a press release saying they hate fat people. Which, honestly, I wish they would because you want to know where the most dangerous stretch of a road always is? Right in front of a McDonald’s. I’m dead serious, people will fucking kill you to make that turn. Later today, at least half of you will be driving only to see someone’s eyes glaze over as they hang the craziest left you’ve ever seen in your life. It’s like the government went to scrap all its mind control experiments and went, “Hey, want this for your burgers? We were just gonna toss it out back by the dumpster.”
Photo: Splash News