Aaron Carter’s Secret Political Intelligence Has Led Him Back To Trump

*swipes right*

Seen above making hobo showering sexy again, Aaron Carter has once again decided to support Donald Trump because Aaron Carter refuses to cave to bullying. Also, he’s now operating off a cache of secret, super intelligent political information that you meanie meanheads don’t know about. Aren’t drugs neat, kids? Via People:

“I deal with things like, people who are slandering, defaming me for supporting somebody, but you’re doing the exact same thing to me that you’re having a problem with him in the first place,” he explains, adding, “I’m too intelligent for you guys – like people, who don’t understand politics. I have a lot more information than I’ve given out.

“For example, when I was seven, I was blindfolded by a record executive who told me that if I danced in my underwear for him, I would have enough money to buy as many Skittles as I wanted. Do you even know how many Skittles I’ve had as of today? We’re talking hundreds. Bet all you smart guys out there didn’t know about sweet deals like that.”

But wait, more stupid fell out of him, because somehow after that response the reporter for People didn’t dive off a roof:

“I don’t agree with building walls. I don’t agree with you at one point supporting the gay community and then all the sudden you don’t, I don’t support that.” “The day that I said I was voting for Donald Trump, I was doing an LGBT event that night. I was number one trending topic on Facebook, worldwide, all this, and I had this whole community that would attack me. But when I got there, all they had to do was have a conversation with me to realize that I’m a smart guy, I understand politics.”

He continued, “You see, I’m the perfect Trump supporter, because I have all these things I believe in, but I don’t have a goddamn clue how to utilize our political system to achieve any of it, so I figure if I just yell a lot and broadly generalize about my commitment to my convictions, some other, far smarter people will be left holding the bag on actually making society work.”

And here’s the most dangerous and truthful thing to accidentally fall out of his meth mist of a skull cavity:

“Guess what, people are gonna go vote for him – they’re just not gonna tell you about it.”

This is the 12-year-old mentality we’re dealing with — I swear to Christ I’ve finally figured out what “Make America Great Again” means and its recess. These are adults who never got over that first day of middle school transition and just want to go back to a simpler time where personal responsibility ended with remembering your art smock.

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