Archive for August, 2010

Paris Hilton is Getting a Felony Charge. Just Like She Wanted.

August 30th, 2010 // 38 Comments
Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton
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I’ve been trying failing horribly not to give Paris Hilton exactly what she wants from this ordeal (Read: All of Lindsay Lohan‘s press.), but apparently the Las Vegas PD are going to play her little game and also make themselves look like idiots by attempting to charge her with felony drug possession for less than a gram of coke that was obtained using questionable procedures. TMZ reports: More »

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Sofia Vergara Gets Her Own Post

August 30th, 2010 // 31 Comments
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Here’s Sofia Vergara, with all her natural hotness that should’ve battled Christina Hendricks’ breasts for the sake of quality television, at the Emmys last night where I hope nobody took her seriously about running naked down Sunset if Modern Family won. Which it did. If I had a nickel for every time a woman promised me nudity only to not make with the goods, I’d probably still have two kidneys and a credit score higher than 12. I guess what I’m trying to say is, only trust a stripper with these kind of transactions. If she says she needs the deed to your grandmother’s house, there’s going to be breasts at the end of that tunnel. At least 75% of the time. (Damn your black heart, Titsy!)

Photos: Getty, Splash News

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Snooki Should Say ‘Yes’

August 30th, 2010 // 46 Comments
Snooki
Snooki
Snooki
Snooki
Snooki
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Jeff Miranda, the Iraq war vet who tried to be Snooki‘s boyfriend just to get on Jersey Shore, is now proposing to her on the cover of Cheap Famewhore Steppin’ Out magazine despite the fact she’s seen in these photos trying to bang some random dude over the weekend only to miraculously recognize her limits and start humping a support beam. RadarOnline reports: More »

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Christina Hendricks Was Definitely At The Emmys

August 30th, 2010 // 121 Comments
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
Christina Hendricks at the Emmys
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I may not have watched or even known/cared the Emmys were on, but I can safely tell you there were only two things there last night and you’re looking directly at them. Oh, and also that red-headed chick. Wait. Where did she come from? Did someone leave the portal to Ireland open again? — Oh, no, my potato garden. Quick, distract her with whiskey and Catholicism! The power of Christ compels you, the power of Christ compels you! *dangles bottle of Jameson’s on a string*

Photos: Getty, WireImage

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I Think Something Happened to Paris Hilton

August 30th, 2010 // 33 Comments
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
Lindsay Lohan
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But who gives a shit? Look at these shots of Lindsay Lohan from over the weekend!

God, she’s so hot right now. Sometimes I forget there’s other celebrities out there, that’s how exciting and relevant and newsworthy she is. No, really, I hope the entertainment media writes about her – and only her – more. And I’m not just saying that as a representative sample of the males age 18-34 with disposable income demographic. Entirely.

(Dear HerpFoot, try again. – The Superficial)

Photos: Fame

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The Paris Hilton Mug Shot

August 30th, 2010 // 29 Comments
Paris Hilton Mug Shot 2010

You know what would make this even better?

Lindsay Lohan. God, she’s so important right now. (This might never get old.)

Photo: Splash News

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