Archive for September, 2009

Mary-Louise Parker steals boyfriends

September 28th, 2009 // 63 Comments

Mary-Louise Parker is currently dating 35 year old singer Charlie Mars, but according to an angry e-mail sent to Defamer, Mary-Louise reportedly “stole” him from his girlfriend of three years not unlike a situation to happen that happened to her with Billy Crudup. Here’s what she wrote:

“Readers may find it interesting that actress Mary Louise Parker who was dumped late in her pregnancy five years ago went on to rip apart the three year relationship of her new boyfriend Charlie Mars and his then 25 year old Mississippi girlfriend.
Early June Mars was still in a relationship with news anchor Lindsey Brown who is a journalist in Meridian Mississippi. Mars and Brown met while Brown was finishing up college at the University of Mississippi. It was Brown who helped Mars move through his substance/drug abuse problems he has battled for the last decade.
You would think a woman who suffered so greatly at the hands of a man would work to make sure other women aren’t betrayed the same way…”

The note ends with “ladies beware, cougars have no shame.”

I know it’s always easier to blame the other woman in these situations, but listen, ladies, as someone who has cheated multiple times, I can honestly say that you’re absolutely right. If a woman offers to have sex with a man, it’s basically impossible to turn her down and therefore completely her fault. It’d be like expecting a fish not to swim or a stripper not to have a secret asking price for a handjob. Some things are just nature.

Mary-Louise Parker Cooks Naked-Like for Esquire

Photos: Getty

Lady GaGa doesn’t want you to notice her

September 28th, 2009 // 65 Comments

Here’s Lady GaGa arriving at Dulles International Airport in D.C. this morning and trying her best to avoid being photographed by the paparazzi. A task that might’ve been made simpler by, oh I dunno, wearing pants and not looking like you’re about to drive a limo with your clitoris after eating a punchbowl full of coke. Just a thought.

Photos: Splash News

Hugh Jackman & Daniel Craig interrupted by cell phone. Pissiness ensues.

September 28th, 2009 // 53 Comments

Hugh Jackman and Daniel Craig had their performances interrupted in the Broadway play “A Steady Rain” last week when a theatergoer’s cell phone went off in the front row. The generally unflappable Hugh actually stops the play and asks the person “Are you gonna get that?” James Bond gets in on the act and this is exactly why I don’t go to plays anymore: The actors always try to kick my ass. Listen, I wouldn’t take off my shirt and flex in front of the stage if you actually said something interesting. “Wah, being a salesman suck. Let’s talk about it for two hours.” < My naked torso. Don't fight the science.

Video: TMZ

Jessica Alba is a redhead now

September 28th, 2009 // 54 Comments

Because apparently nothing happened this weekend besides Khloe Kardashian’s wedding – so still basically nothing – here’s Jessica Alba sporting her new red hairdo yesterday in LA. I was going to assume this was for a role, but when’s the last time Jessica Alba’s been in anything? That people watched, I mean. Sorry, I should’ve prefaced that.

Britney Spears is done doing this

September 28th, 2009 // 51 Comments

Britney Spears performed her last Circus concert in Vegas last night (above) which means she’s no longer any use to her dad, so it’s time to release her into the wild. I don’t know about you guys, but now would be a good time to buy stock in KFC, and vagina Bedazzlers.

Photos: Splash News

Khloe Kardashian & Lamar Odom perform a wedding ceremony for the cameras

September 28th, 2009 // 48 Comments

Seen here getting ready to leave for their honeymoon, Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom held some sort of wedding ceremony yesterday that was filmed for Keeping Up with the Kardashians. Whether it was a legally binding marriage remains to be seen, but hey, it’s Khloe’s special day so let’s focus on what really matters: How huge Kim’s ass looks from a helicopter.

Seriously, I’m surprised there’s not a propeller blade stuck in it from Chopper 1′s attempt to snap pics of the buffet. “I see meatballs. Repeat. Meatbal- wait. Something’s pulling us in. Something big. I’ve been flying for 30 years and I’ve never felt a gravitational pull like this. Why do I smell mustache wax? – KSSSSSTT.” [Last transmission recovered from black box.]

Photos: Flynet, Mavrix