May 23, 2006
Paris Hilton gets paid for nothing

In case you've wondered how Paris Hilton makes her money, apparently she gets paid tons of cheddar (I'm gangster, yo) by idiots who want her to show up to their events. She was paid $200,000 just for appearing at a charity event in Cannes on Saturday, and was also reportedly paid $1 million to show up for a similar event in Vienna a few weeks ago.
"All I had to do was wave, like this," she said, imitating Queen Elizabeth II's stately palm swivel.
If that's not the most disgusting thing you've ever read then you are a vile and disgusting human being who reads about things way more disgusting than a normal person should be reading about. I saw a man drink his own vomit after throwing up into his beer and just chuckled. But after reading about Paris getting paid $1 million to wave? This must be how Jews feel when they read about the Holocaust.
Previous Entries
» Britney Spears loves her money» The Superficial Ketchup
» Paris Hilton delays album again
» Lindsay Lohan moves in on Stavros Niarchos
» Kate Moss beats up Pete Doherty again


Comments
1. Posted by Jedi Kevin on May 23, 2006 10:38 AM
Just one more reason to kill her. As if we needed one.
2. Posted by Sheva on May 23, 2006 10:39 AM
First ya bitatches. But I reserve the number one position for the Queen of Skanks.
What's the world come to?
3. Posted by IFuckingHateYou on May 23, 2006 10:40 AM
Are those people paying $1 per crab on her infested snatch or what? How else would she be worth $1 million?
4. Posted by Giggles on May 23, 2006 10:41 AM
When will her 15 minutes be over?
5. Posted by frangly on May 23, 2006 10:45 AM
All I'm feeling is JEALOUSY! I want that job!! :-(
6. Posted by shan on May 23, 2006 10:45 AM
whatever! that's a DREAM job!
7. Posted by DancingQueen on May 23, 2006 10:45 AM
This bitch is famous for doing nothing. Un-fucking-believable.
8. Posted by shan on May 23, 2006 10:45 AM
whatever! that's a dream job!
9. Posted by RTH on May 23, 2006 10:50 AM
Frankly, Paris and all the Paris worshippers out there need to all die in a fiery explosion. It'd be bad if it was just her, but she's "popular" because of all those other jackasses out there.
10. Posted by Steph on May 23, 2006 10:51 AM
She looks strangely like Ashlee Simpson
11. Posted by gas_up_the_hrududu on May 23, 2006 10:52 AM
This story fills me with such despair and rage that I had to scream into my pillow for about ten minutes. It was either that or set fire to my neighbor's car, which is a piece of shit anyway.
12. Posted by gammanormids on May 23, 2006 10:54 AM
This is sooo depresing. I mean, we all work - hard - to get a middle decent life and this slut just have to show her ugly face and wave her hand like a retard and make 1 million? WTF?
ANd the worst is that she thinks that's the most normal thing because for her, life is like 'the simple life': losing a job is not big deal because production will get her another one. Oh! Please someone shot her! SHOT HER!
13. Posted by Gerald Tarrant on May 23, 2006 10:55 AM
How long until the Tommy Lee/Paris/Nicky video gets released from this little boat ride?
14. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 10:56 AM
How about paying her NOT to show up, I bet she quadruples her fortune in no time.
But she'd still be dirt po' in Brandon Davis' world, 'cause that's how he rolls.
15. Posted by Johnny Be Good on May 23, 2006 10:56 AM
What self respecting "charity" would throw away $1,000,000 to have a whore famous for nothing wave at their event? That should be widely publicized so people can stop giving them any of their hard earned money. Jesus Paris disgusts me.
16. Posted by LickyLicky on May 23, 2006 10:59 AM
Maybe SHE'S the one with the seven-foot clitoris, and it's that with which she waves! I mean, I'd pay a cool MM to see a seven-foot clitoris waving like Queen Liz. Then again, I also tied a green hanky around my dog's tail and made a new religion out of it: Wagallah. Maybe I'm not the best judge of what to spend a lot of money on, unless it's a grenade launcher and a GPS system to make sure it stays on target with Paris's crotch so that she can, at some point, be annihilated for the good of all mankind.
So maybe I am the best judge of what to spend a lot of money on.
17. Posted by Gerald Tarrant on May 23, 2006 10:59 AM
I would assume that a prestigious event such as the AVN Awards would pay her to show up. Definitely she would get paid for a Valtrex corporate meeting. Other than that, I'm at a loss.
18. Posted by Captain Awesome on May 23, 2006 10:59 AM
Out of all the white girls OJ could have killed, he let this one go.
19. Posted by Johnny Be Good on May 23, 2006 10:59 AM
As a footnote, what "celebrity" ACCEPTS $1,000,000 to "JUST WAVE" at a a CHARITY event? Did someone bother to define for Paris what charity means? Must be another in a series of proud moments for the Hilton family!
20. Posted by tamtamtam on May 23, 2006 11:00 AM
i think ebayfan414's comment from the other day bears repeating at this time: paris truly is a "cum-guzzling herpes circus"...
CGHC!
21. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 11:00 AM
I detest her. She's nothing but a whore with money, and people are giving her more money to wave? What a disgusting waste of money. And I love that she was paid $200,000 to appear at a CHARITY EVENT. Soooo..let me get this straight. They're trying to raise money for a charitable cause, but throw away $200,000 that could have benefited needy people so that this vapid disease-ridden whore would attend? ARGH!
22. Posted by msdoormat on May 23, 2006 11:02 AM
I get paid for looking at the Superficial all day...its just that my boss doesnt know it.
23. Posted by CancerNipples on May 23, 2006 11:02 AM
Who pays her? That's what I don't get, especially if it's a charity event.
If it's charity, that seems like a really risky wager to pay this skank 200grand (and who else did they pay or was she the only celebrity) to show up at your charity event.
I don't get it.
Oh and I'm so sorry this isn't funny.
24. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 11:06 AM
If Dante were alive today he'd definitely add a new circle to hell just for this cunt and her ilk.
25. Posted by Getitstraight on May 23, 2006 11:07 AM
What a waste of skin.
26. Posted by playahater101 on May 23, 2006 11:09 AM
I wish someone would have the sense to knock her off the boat and drive away. But they need to go out to sea further. Why can't Paris be one of the people who disappears off acruise ship?
27. Posted by playahater101 on May 23, 2006 11:10 AM
#4, her 15 minutes will end up being 15 years.
28. Posted by Binky on May 23, 2006 11:14 AM
...bring down the zero, carry the 1, hummm. HEY WAIT a sec !
That's more than I get !!
Beeatch !!
29. Posted by Johnny Be Good on May 23, 2006 11:17 AM
Bragging about being paid to attend and wave at a charity event, classy. Next she will take a tour of Ethiopa and then rave to the press about the food in her hotel.
30. Posted by 86 on May 23, 2006 11:17 AM
I've never wished death on anyone until she came along.
31. Posted by PapaHotNuts on May 23, 2006 11:18 AM
I would gladly pay her 2 million dollars to enter a Chlorox drinking contest.
32. Posted by Zed on May 23, 2006 11:18 AM
Please someone tell me the names of these charities so I never ever make a contribution to them.
What a waste of contributors' hard-earned money ...
33. Posted by 86 on May 23, 2006 11:19 AM
What sucks is the people in the boat look SO smug just to be captured in a picture with her. These NOBODIES are probably going to have new careers now just because they were seen with her.
34. Posted by coolnina97 on May 23, 2006 11:22 AM
Back in ye olde days, entertainment folk had to sing, dance, act, the whole lot in order to (a)get a job. Fame was a whole different story, which usually followed some unfuckingbelievable talent and a lot of hard work. The fact that people give a shit about the likes of Paris Hilton and Victoria Beckham (because let's face it, if they didn't they wouldn't get so much media coverage)is a very worrying symptom of what's considered talent these days. Someone needs to design a T-shirt which has a picture of Paris and a blurb which reads: 'Who gives a fuck?!?' I'd certainly buy one.
35. Posted by gogoboots on May 23, 2006 11:22 AM
UCK...the world is messed up...why would you pay her a million dollars to show up at parties for 20 minutes...so she can infect all men with her herpes-ridden crotch?! Also, the girl that she's always with is a starfucker...who is she anyway? What nobody realizes is that Paris is NOTHING!
36. Posted by RichPort on May 23, 2006 11:25 AM
Everytime some idiotic company pays this maroon anything for showing her snatch to the papparazzi, the terrorists win.
37. Posted by Italian Stallion on May 23, 2006 11:25 AM
Where's Jaws when you need him? Fucking good for nothing shark.......
38. Posted by Zed on May 23, 2006 11:28 AM
Most celebrities realize that any cash stipends made by charitable organizations for a celebrity's appearance at a charitable event should be turned right back to the organization as a donation.
But Paris, being brain-dead and all, takes the stipend and keeps it. She's Queen of Idiots, her new title.
39. Posted by SparklingStarlet on May 23, 2006 11:28 AM
Perhaps, if we all pooled together our money, we could convince Paris to:
a]Wear a metal guarded, security-enforced chastity belt over her nasty, mutilated Crotch of Doom for the rest of eternity as to ensure her crusty skank diseases do not further infect the global population;
b]Jump off the highest story of the largest Hilton hotel and plummet into a pit of angry lesbians who will beat her to death with spiked dildos and acid-drenched copies of "Confessions of an Heirhead"
c]Admit that she's really the anti-Christ and allow herself to become stoned to death, Bible-style;
d]All of the above.
She'd probably go for it too, provided there was a "hawt" spread about it in Us Weekly.
Seriously though, I doubt a charity would give ANYONE, especially this worthless slut, 1 million dollars to wave her hand and make her stupid faces everywhere.
[/enraged rant]
40. Posted by playahater101 on May 23, 2006 11:29 AM
That money they pay paris for an appearance is money that could be going towards their charitable work. I'd like to know what half assed charities these are so I know never to give them money since all they're doing is paying Paris, who doesn't need ANYTHING.
41. Posted by playahater101 on May 23, 2006 11:30 AM
I HATE her even more now.
42. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 11:30 AM
@26 - ya think? I'm thinking if anything, people would assume they were dirty, herpe-riddled douchebags doing eveything they can to make sure their crotch-pheasants don't take flight.
43. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 11:31 AM
If Osama Bin Laden were smarter he'd land an Airbus A380 on this bitch's head. I'd be willing to knock a 1,000 yaers off his million years sentence.
44. Posted by XchelleX on May 23, 2006 11:41 AM
You would think a decent human being wouldn't take money to be at a CHARITY EVENT especially if you're already extremely wealthy. Charity events are to raise money for people or causes in need not a dumb slut. This is really disturbing. She is a horrible human being.
45. Posted by Giggles on May 23, 2006 11:43 AM
#20 -- PLEASE don't say that. It will make me find religion or something to escape this hell on earth.
46. Posted by lickmetwice on May 23, 2006 11:45 AM
Come on. We all know she will be donating that money to the people of Darfur.
47. Posted by hugo on May 23, 2006 11:47 AM
For that money I'd wave too! What I find amazing is that there are people and organizations willing to pay those ridiculous amounts of money to her.
48. Posted by flamarkel on May 23, 2006 11:51 AM
I've always believed in karma - what goes around comes around, and all that. But I'm starting to doubt. God, if you wanna keep me on your good side, you better do something to her and it better be soon.
49. Posted by KaylaGrace on May 23, 2006 11:53 AM
@ 11.... If I had a million dollars right now, I would so give it to you.
Also, I'm sure if Brandon was reading these posts he'd be laughing his ass off that we all think a million dollars is alot of money. Anyone who thinks that a million dollars is alot of money is DEFINETLY a hobo. But he's right after all, I mean all of us live on the streets.
50. Posted by 86 on May 23, 2006 12:07 PM
34 in a perfect world, my friend. Kimberly Stewart owes her 15 minutes to Paris. Skanks!!
51. Posted by shoof on May 23, 2006 12:11 PM
What's up with the focking 1985 feathered haircut on her loser girlfriend?
And, nice hat loserdick. Obviously he was afraid the shine off of the top of his head would cause too much glare on all the cameras.
LOL at the Jaws comment.
52. Posted by BoognishRising on May 23, 2006 12:13 PM
I don't believe she's capable of the "swivel-wrist" motion. Years of her semi-closed hand going up and down would make that physically impossible for her.
53. Posted by Charlaurz McHall on May 23, 2006 12:24 PM
Slightly uncomfortableabout the Jews/holocaust joke, but maybe thats just me.
on another note, WTF?? that cant be serious, $1 million. By a charity. i refuse to believe it, on te grounds that if i accept it, might head might actually explode.
http://celebreligion.com
54. Posted by TaiTai on May 23, 2006 12:26 PM
Really? I thought that was Ashlee Simpson and Matthew McConaghey in the boat with her. Ashlee, I wouldn't be too surprised, but you would think Matthew would have enough self-respect to push her overboard.
55. Posted by Pie Man on May 23, 2006 12:27 PM
Ugh, I feel so sick watching that guy drink his own vomit. I'm dry heaving.
56. Posted by Proteon on May 23, 2006 12:37 PM
Dear site admin:
Please take the rest of the week off and come back next week without these lame leftover "articles".
Thank you
57. Posted by Gene Parmigiana on May 23, 2006 12:37 PM
because who wouldn't want to contribute money to a charitable organization that paris hilton endorses???? So this charity is for finding the cure for herbe infested no talent bitches. Where do i send the check?
58. Posted by billabong021 on May 23, 2006 12:39 PM
*dies*
59. Posted by EvilCutie25 on May 23, 2006 12:41 PM
LOL at billabong021, heehee
I've officially lost hope in all humanity.
60. Posted by Kells on May 23, 2006 12:46 PM
I wish I knew what charity paid her that much so I could make sure to never make a donation! Two hundred thousand dollars for her to show up and wave? Those poor people who thought their donations were going to help make the world a better place.
61. Posted by Grphdesi23 on May 23, 2006 01:01 PM
I'll say it once, I'll say it twice.
Sluts just heal quicker.
62. Posted by sueyboo on May 23, 2006 01:03 PM
argh. when WILL her "15 min of fame" be over? come on!
63. Posted by 86 on May 23, 2006 01:09 PM
and they take longer to die, apparently.
64. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 01:12 PM
Her 15mins will stretch for as long as they pandering to her skank ass. I mean, how is it that even Snoop agreed to do commercials with her after it was widely reported that she's a straight out racist. But they keep giving her endorsements, that Vanity Fair guy's got the right idea by banning her from their party. And what the fuck is she doing at the Cannes film thing anyway?
They need to start ignoring, banning and humiliating her so she goes the fuck away already.
65. Posted by Geno on May 23, 2006 01:12 PM
Lucky slut.
If anyone wants to come to my blog and give me money, I will wave to you. And smile.
http://catholictvguy.blogspot.com/
66. Posted by Fisher55 on May 23, 2006 01:21 PM
why is Paris on a boat with Jason Patric and the chick from Wonder Years?
67. Posted by ultra8201 on May 23, 2006 01:24 PM
I hate her, why is she famous???
I can't take it anymore!!!
http://ultra8201.blogspot.com
68. Posted by Stacyy on May 23, 2006 01:30 PM
#7, Shot her? hehehehehehehehehehehehe.lol AHHAHA shot her. aaaah. u guys, if u were born with that much money, trust me, ud be doing the exaact same thing. who is going to teach her ethics and morals and everything we know, her rich ass parents?
she can buy anything she wants with money and thats never going to change. so get used to it and stop caring wat the stupid bitch does.
and u guys, someone worked hard for the money she has, nomatter how far back it was. and im sure that one day when u guys have kids, if u do, the money that u make u want to help ure kids with. thats what the Hilton who worked hard to make money was thinking, and they did it so their kids wont have to worry about working. so next time u curse out paris hilton for not having to do anything in life, dont give ure kids allowance or money at all.
and even though we hate that she doesnt have to do anything except show up at charity events, well lets face it, those who are poor and hate her, actually benefit from this cuz ppl tend to support a cuase that popular rich ppl support.
and dont tell me shes not popular cuz if she wasnt we really wudnt be talking about her right now. unless shes done something personal to u u shudnt hate her. if u were rich ud do what she did as well. u wudnt sit there and work ure ass off for a mediocre payment, she already has money.
69. Posted by Stacyy on May 23, 2006 01:31 PM
the point is, someone worked for all the money she has.
70. Posted by playahater101 on May 23, 2006 01:55 PM
Giggles, she definitely isn't going anywhere. Especially if organizations pay her to just sit there. I know clubs pay her to appear, too. Her and K-fed. If that isn't hell on Earth, I don't know what is. People who are worthless losers get paid to stand there. UGGHHH!!!!!!!!
71. Posted by M@ce on May 23, 2006 01:59 PM
M@ce no like pubic crustaceans.
M@ce SMASH!
72. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 02:04 PM
I once knew a guy who beat off to her sex video and his hand gave him herpes.
True story.
73. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 02:08 PM
It was worth it. I love that woman.
74. Posted by PapaHotNuts on May 23, 2006 02:12 PM
Paris Hilton makes Stevie Wonder the luckiest man alive.
75. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 02:15 PM
Skippy, I have a nice branch that blew off my tree this morning. You can have that and fuck the knot hole in it.
76. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 02:17 PM
Pinky you are one funny chic!!!! LOL @ 55
77. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 02:21 PM
Pinky, it would be safer than screwing Paris. All you'd get would be splinters--nothing permanent, but will Paris--well, I don't need to say it.
78. Posted by Remie on May 23, 2006 02:27 PM
I love that she makes money for no reason at all. She is proof that it doesn't take talent to succeed, and for some reason I find that very reassuring.
79. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 02:30 PM
I'd like to put red carpet down on a short plank and pay her to walk down it and wave.
Wearing the new Manola Blahnik cement shoe line.
80. Posted by longlegs on May 23, 2006 02:40 PM
I think this site should ban Paris. No Paris news or updates. How could she possibly thrive without any attention? Would anyone pay her money if suddenly she brought no publicity? I definitely like to dis her, but I would love it if she would just go away. Paris who?
81. Posted by bigponie on May 23, 2006 02:46 PM
I'll make her queen of the world if she would make an appearance in "PLUTO"
82. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 02:57 PM
Dude you guys are going to be so sorry when you find out she's reading this site and only likes me because I stick up for her. I'll bet she's really nice. In fact, she'll probably let me do her in the butt just to reassure me that I won't get herpes. Paris, call me. I love you.
83. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 02:59 PM
Rest assured that if I ever became a billionaire I would create "Space Tourism Corporation" I would lure these oxygen wasters to "promote" my space tours.
After I pack them up nice and tight on that rocket I'd aim it so it crashes straight at the moon. No drama, no tears just skanks and moondust.
84. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 03:01 PM
LOL to you Zanna. Let's have some hot lesbian sex.
85. Posted by watcher on May 23, 2006 03:03 PM
last.
86. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:03 PM
#60
Yes, I'm going to be soooooo sorry not to be liked by the guttertrash named Paris. You are MORE than welcome to share diseases together. I think you're pretty confused and have the reading comprehension of a gnat if you think anyone on this site doesn't want the Earth to open up and swallow Paris.
87. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:05 PM
P.S.
It's obvious that you're just saying you like Paris to get attention, because that's the only way you can get it. It sucks when you can't post anything funny.
88. Posted by Fisher55 on May 23, 2006 03:10 PM
and #60, and herpes can be transmitted anally. trust me.
89. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 03:14 PM
@66 , your post raises some interesting questions about your ...physical well being?
:)
90. Posted by Pearly on May 23, 2006 03:19 PM
The only thing I can see paying this skank for is to blow her air filled head off although she'd probably react like a chicken and keep walking around waving and speading disease...
91. Posted by DrDanny on May 23, 2006 03:29 PM
Jeebus, what did you people think she did for money? Sing? Seriously, I suspect lots of pseudo-stars get serious incomes from this kind of thing.
92. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:30 PM
#68
It would be a whole new spin on the avian bird flu thing.
93. Posted by andrewthezeppo on May 23, 2006 03:33 PM
So do actual celebrities who are famous for something other than herpes get paid for showing up? Can I get paid to show up?
94. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 03:35 PM
I really like posts 64 and 65. Post 64 unloads a blistering dose of sarcasm and anger that puzzled me until I imagined the author with acne and braces. I have "the reading comprehension of a gnat" --- wow, lines like that must knock 'em dead in Social Studies class. Then 2 minutes later she (and only a homely woman would be this upset at the idea that someone likes Paris) realizes that she is the one who has "the reading comprehension of a gnat," so the story changes to "you're just looking for attention." And you know all about being starved for attention, don't you fatty?
OK, OK, OK. My apologies. From now on I'll be funny like everyone else here. Hey everybody, Paris has HERPES! Ha ha!
95. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 03:39 PM
Oh, Miss Pinky you just made my nipples hard.
96. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 03:39 PM
No, Skip, what's funny is that she really has herpes, Skip.
97. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 03:42 PM
Skippy: from now on, I will ignore you, and I'm sure most of the crew here will do the same. But honestly, do you really think Paris would piss on you if you were on fire? Unless you've got a billion dollar trust fund, the closest you'll ever get to Paris is winning a round trip to France on the Price is Right.
98. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 03:45 PM
No, that's just a rumor she started to keep all you guys from hitting on her. I was smart enough to figure out it's all a scam, so I'm going to have her to myself.
99. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 03:46 PM
Pinky (re: 75)..he's not even going to get the trip to Paris. The closest he'll ever get is where he is right now.
Naked, in front of the computer with a bottle of Jergens and some Kleenex.
*Jergens and Kleenex have not paid me for that endorsement*
100. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 03:48 PM
Where are all the funny people that are supposed to post on this site? All I see is a pack of bitter hags. Pinky, I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. I'll fuck your tree branch now if it makes you feel better.
101. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:49 PM
No, Skippy, I am just sarcastic (and thank you for calling it 'blistering', I'm flattered), it's my way. And I guess you didn't get the memo, calling people "fatty" is sooo HWMNBN. You also forgot to call me a "SLIMY SLUG".
Pinky, I'm all over that.
102. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 03:50 PM
#77
Vaseline is better. Jergens burns the sensitive anal tissues.
103. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 03:51 PM
>>"Pinky, I'm all over that."
Fuck you bitch. That's MY tree branch, and I'll see you in hell before I let you touch it.
104. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:51 PM
Then if we are a pack of bitter hags, you better leave soon, Paris would never look for you here. Maybe you could hang out in the Vagisil aisle.
105. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 03:53 PM
@80 - I guess you would know.
I only use Jergens when I want to multi-task and jack someone off and moisturize at the same time.
106. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 03:54 PM
Skip, you 'tard, I wasn't talking about your precious tree branch (and since that's the closest thing to a pussy you'll ever get, I'd hate to deprive you of it), I was talking about ignoring you from now on. And I don't remember your name being Pinky.
So farewell,
Hugs n' Kisses
and a big
FUCK YOU.
107. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 03:56 PM
Skippy - you could porobably find Paris here:
http://www.mpwh.net/
108. Posted by NewGuy on May 23, 2006 03:57 PM
I'm back bitches.
Everyone shut the fuck up. Especially you PINKY, you sound like an ugly whore. Paris Hilton needs this money to find a cure for herpes. Godspeed Paris, I feel guilty everytime I have to lie.
109. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 03:59 PM
*High Five*, Feed Me.
110. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 04:01 PM
Zanna, nice website! HAHA! Damn there's a site for everyone. That's so nice, everyone can find love even losers like HWMNBN.
I'd like to find love between your thighs. MEOW!
111. Posted by frank-sinatra on May 23, 2006 04:07 PM
oh gawd people
112. Posted by dosita on May 23, 2006 04:27 PM
comment #6: your post made my day. god, could someone shoot this bitch already? they try to assassinate presidents, why not her? dear lord.
113. Posted by Fisher55 on May 23, 2006 04:29 PM
that herpes dating site must be a joke, right? what next, a site for disabled people?
114. Posted by Fisher55 on May 23, 2006 04:30 PM
and by the way, the posts suck lately because the site sucks. boring, infrequent stories about the same 5 people over and over
the maggie gyllenhaal thread was my recent favorite...
115. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 04:37 PM
@89 - seems to be a real site..I googled it special for Skippy since he has a thing for chics with the herp. And I'm one to try to give the people what they want. Except the herp. This, i cannot give. For this I do not have.
Anyway, Pinky...you best settle down there missy....or I'ma gonna find you..grab the back of your head and force my "love" into your face! And I mean that in the most positive of ways. ; )
116. Posted by unrational on May 23, 2006 04:43 PM
I'm getting so sick of this stupid tramp. I despise Lindsay Hohan.. but Paris makes Lindsay look virginal. And that Brandon Davis WOW.. what a fagget.
117. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 04:53 PM
i can't believe the Superfish didn't pick up on this story:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AzRY9enwaqg&search=brandon%20davis
118. Posted by pinky_nip on May 23, 2006 04:54 PM
@91 promise? *grinning devilishly*
BTW... a new post might be a nice. The SF guy must have another outbreak himself.
119. Posted by Zanna on May 23, 2006 04:57 PM
93 - Yes.
And no shit...we have to resort to making our OWN fun.
SF guy? You out there, buddy?
120. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 05:02 PM
http://www.healthboards.com/boards/showthread.php?p=2367983#post2367983
121. Posted by ScriptRadar on May 23, 2006 05:06 PM
Paris was probably hired by French charities.*
Les Francais sont cretins, n'est pas?
*No word play intended
122. Posted by 86 on May 23, 2006 05:25 PM
92 - ha! That chick has balls. My favorite part was, "Go home and take a shower. Lindsey earns her money, you just get yours from daddy."
123. Posted by Jacq on May 23, 2006 05:30 PM
She gets paid to do all of these appearances, but still fucks for free. *shrug*
124. Posted by tsarinaamanda on May 23, 2006 05:33 PM
@97-
My fave part was when she said "No wonder Mischa dumped your sorry ass", and of course I loved the crack about him not earning his money. What a tool. Feed_me, I didn't know you had the herp....ohhh, NOW I get it, Skippy there is PRETENDING to be you! Hahaha....ha? Lame.
125. Posted by tripmaster on May 23, 2006 05:34 PM
If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around, wouldn't that slut still have the Herp?
126. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 05:36 PM
Let's get back to our usual high standards of comedy.
Hey everybody, guess what?!? Paris has HERPES!
127. Posted by Jacq on May 23, 2006 05:36 PM
#92/97 - I liked the "No wonder Mischa dumped your sorry ass!" If I saw him, I would yell more of the same, louder, with more profanity. Did I mention that I would have done that before he said all of that? I think he "insluted" her.
128. Posted by Ari on May 23, 2006 05:38 PM
And creepy, obsessed and delusional fans!
129. Posted by Ari on May 23, 2006 05:39 PM
Sorry, #102 was a response to #100... though I don't know why I'm bothering to use numbers, since they'll change a dozen times before tomorrow.
130. Posted by Sodomy_is_for_Girls on May 23, 2006 05:44 PM
I made it to 8 before jumping to post this, so forgive me if it has been addressed, but:
Gerald:
I totally fucking called that that was Tommy on the first post about this bitch!
Great minds think alike.
Of course, I don't think there is anyone on earth that would call Heather Locklear, Pam Anderson and Paris Hilton great minds...
131. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 05:47 PM
You're right. I should try to be less obsessive. I'll follow your non-obsessive lead, and tell the same jokes about the same people over and over and over ...
Paris has HERPES!!! Pure comedy gold, I tell you.
132. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 05:58 PM
Although, at this pont is a pretty safe bet that Herpes has Paris Hilton.
poor herpes.
Paris, the gift that keeps on givin'.
133. Posted by Sodomy_is_for_Girls on May 23, 2006 06:00 PM
Okay, read everything.
@78:
I'm right here, fucktard.
134. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 06:15 PM
That's nice.
135. Posted by Sodomy_is_for_Girls on May 23, 2006 06:17 PM
Just letting you know, is all...
136. Posted by lurkerx on May 23, 2006 06:18 PM
I pay her a million dollars to stand in the middle of a busy freeway and wave. Tell her it's for a cameo in Final Destination 3.
137. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 06:23 PM
Great! The junior high girls are ignoring me right now because I have cooties. And anal warts. But hopefully we can still be friends. Unless you don't like Paris Hilton.
138. Posted by Sodomy_is_for_Girls on May 23, 2006 06:23 PM
Fucktard.
139. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 06:24 PM
Quick sign in before I go back to switching my hotel room to avoid this fat stalker I seem to have attracted....but that is another story.
Hey would all you guys pipe down! In case you didn't hear, Zanna and Pinky nip are going lesbian, and I really, really want to watch....girls, I'll stand respectfully in the corner, and make sure no one gets splattered...unless you're into that, in which case wear some safety goggles.
140. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 06:26 PM
yeah, safety goggles, thigh high red fishnets, high heels, maybe some feathers and a smile....
can't. stop. masturbating.
141. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 06:28 PM
"Price check on Vagiclean, aisle five. I repeat: price check on Vagiclean, aisle five. That's Vagiclean. We've got a customer down here with a full-on fallopian fungus. She's baking a loaf of bread and I think it's sourdough."
142. Posted by prettierthanmeganharris on May 23, 2006 06:31 PM
Please, can't we go at least a week without hearing about Herpes Hilton.
But Zanna, thanks, the clip of Brandon trying to avoid that girl is so funny. What an oily little pussy he is.
143. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 06:32 PM
So what is a fucktard exactly? Is it a fucking retard? A guy who fucks retarded people? Someone that tells the same joke about Paris Hilton having herpes over and over?
144. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 06:33 PM
Hey, Feed Me;
got a great idea from that! I have a use for Hilton, and other yeasty women!
We turn her upside down, and brew beer. I bet she could produce several gallons at a time.
145. Posted by Sodomy_is_for_Girls on May 23, 2006 06:36 PM
The great thing about fucktard is that it means whatever you want it to.
How can you make it work for you?
I really don't give a shit. I just seem to be in a really mean drunk this evening.
Anyway, I'll probably be banned before the night is through.
I am by no means avoiding a fight, just saying I'll be asleep before we really get going, and what's the fun in that?
Fucktard.
146. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 06:48 PM
Tranny:
Right on! Then she might actually have a purpose in life beyond spreading disease! Now for a name...
147. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on May 23, 2006 07:17 PM
People give me money all the time for doing nothing. That is, men give me money. And I don't really DO nothing, I WEAR nothing, then I spin on my head and open bottles of Moet with my vulva. So, you see, me and Paris have a lot in common. Except herpes.
148. Posted by Iambananas on May 23, 2006 07:18 PM
Paris Hilton gets paid for nothing: Isn't that the stroy of her life!!!?????!?!?!
149. Posted by NewGuy on May 23, 2006 07:19 PM
#108 FUNNIEST COMMENT EVER!!!
Everyone go back and read it and then talk about how funny it is! Quick!
150. Posted by Iambananas on May 23, 2006 07:19 PM
Wouldn't her appearing somewhere DETER others from coming (and subsequently catching herpes?)
151. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 07:20 PM
Wow, that's some vulva!
152. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 07:28 PM
B-Slim
Wasn't "Wow, that's some vulva!" one of the comments that sweet little spider wove in "Charlottes Web"?
153. Posted by BarbadoSlim on May 23, 2006 07:32 PM
hahhahahaha...God I wish they'd made some baby back ribs out of that gay tender young pig.
154. Posted by piercedfreak on May 23, 2006 07:34 PM
This confirms she is nothing more than a prostitute. They could have picked millions of others, who look much better, and actually have a use for the money. Hell even Nicky Hilton is 1000000% better.
155. Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh on May 23, 2006 07:40 PM
One morning I woke up with my knees cocked back and a curious little spider had scrawled a message with her silken thread between my thighs: "radiant". That was when the kindly farmer and his family decided not to eat my vagina. God damn spider.
156. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 07:43 PM
Slim;
I heard that the gay lil fella went on to do the voice over for the "squeal like a pig" sequence in Deliverance.
157. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 07:45 PM
Osh;
Be glad it wasn't a trap-door spider, that could be hard on the sex life
158. Posted by Whipper_willow on May 23, 2006 08:07 PM
NO ILLEGAL ALIENS! STOP AMNESTY! STOP THE TAKING OVER OF THE COUNTRY! BECOME A LEGAL CITIZEN THE RIGHT WAY... NOT THE ILLEGAL WAY! IT'S DISGUSTING AND BREAKING THE LAW AND IT MAKES IT MISERABLE FOR LEGAL AMERICANS!
159. Posted by Feed_Me_Chocolate on May 23, 2006 08:08 PM
NewGuy, I scrolled up to #108, but the post numbering must've changed again, because I have no idea what you're talking about.
TrannyGranny, Osh, that's funny shit. Skippy, take notes.
160. Posted by Getitstraight on May 23, 2006 08:42 PM
"Where were you when the boat tipped over?...Oh, I was in the water!" We should only be so lucky...What is the matter with these fucking people paying her hundreds of thousands of dollars? Don't they read this site? Don't they know we all hate her? Who are they, I need to know so I will never again buy ANYTHING they are selling.
161. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 08:43 PM
Feed me,
I have to defer to Osh, that chick kills! ya'll ain't so bad ya-self (fuck get me out of MO before this speech becomes permanent)
162. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 09:10 PM
Post #106: "Skip, I'm ignoring you. I hate you."
Post #159: "Skip, pay attention to me."
Feed me is going to kill Paris in a fit of jealous rage soon.
163. Posted by IOwnYou on May 23, 2006 09:21 PM
every1 just needs to start ignoring her and ban her from all parties.
as long as media, including sites like thesuperficial.com, are posting news about her, her presence around media will continue.
Whether people hate her or love her, it still looks like whatever she does, people respond.
hurts, doesn't it?
164. Posted by TrannyGranny on May 23, 2006 09:21 PM
skippy pee-nut butler...did you not already post that on another thread? running out of ideas This soon?
165. Posted by SparklingStarlet on May 23, 2006 09:26 PM
LMFAO = 155. Candy and Coronas for you baby.
166. Posted by Fa Cube Itches on May 23, 2006 10:04 PM
Tranny (144): Sounds like a pretty rough beer -
Pus Blue Ribbon
Killian's Red Sores?
Herpes Weinhardt's?
Krabsenbourg?
Guinness Simplex-A?
167. Posted by Fa Cube Itches on May 23, 2006 10:05 PM
152: Dunno, but a crab wove it in Paris' Web.
168. Posted by prettierthanmeganharris on May 23, 2006 10:12 PM
Hi Tranny,
xoxoxo to you babe
169. Posted by tsarinaamanda on May 23, 2006 11:03 PM
@137-
You certainly won't find any friends here, we all hate that skank-whore Parasite Hilton.
170. Posted by Skip Smith on May 23, 2006 11:18 PM
TrannyGranny, did I post something twice? My apologies if I did. I'll be sure to post fresh, non-repetitive material from now on, like "Paris Hilton has herpes."
171. Posted by megana on May 23, 2006 11:34 PM
with all the herpetic, clitoric, skanktastic talk of our fair Paris, why has no one mentioned the fact that she's obviously losing her hair. All the money in the world can't get Rogaine to work for her.
Sad, isn't it?
172. Posted by maiira on May 24, 2006 02:19 AM
This bitch disgusts me more than anything.
I have a better idea: why don't we form a charity devoted entirely to throwing Paris off a cliff? I'd contribute to that.
173. Posted by Tulli on May 24, 2006 05:56 AM
Loves it!!
174. Posted by GeannaSparrow on May 24, 2006 10:51 AM
Alright, I had to sign in for this.
I think she should just drop fucking dead.
I'm tired of her ridiculous blonde hair, even more ridiculous fake tan, her humonguous nose and feet.
She should die. Right now.
The world doesn't need her.
175. Posted by DaNiGuRl on May 24, 2006 12:34 PM
Why is this girl famous again? I always thought that first you had to be famous to be rich, but this broad is famous BECAUSE she's rich. damn, and all it took was dancing on a few tables at night clubs and making a sex tape, well and the fact that her dad owns all the Hilton hotel chains in the world! That Bitch!
176. Posted by Jeremy1Esq on May 24, 2006 03:21 PM
Thank god for her she does not need to rely on her ability, or lack thereof, to suck pole to make a living. What a cold fish.
177. Posted by ToolHead on May 24, 2006 04:12 PM
We must find out the identity of these "charities" so that people will know never to donate money to them again. If I donated money to a charity and then later found out that they paid $1 million to Paris as an appearance fee I think I would go ballistic. That's definitely cause for any charity tax exemptions to be stripped.
I don't have any problem with Paris getting appearance fees (even if they are ungodly), but no way should she be receiving money that people have donated to help other people in need. I think this is the most disgusted I have ever been with a celebrity.
178. Posted by HughJorganthethird on May 24, 2006 06:43 PM
That's like a dollar a herpe. sweet deal.
179. Posted by firebase on July 17, 2006 07:29 PM
Everyone repeat this out loud: "I am sofa king Re-tard it." The fact there are 178, 179 entries now with my pearl of wisdom says it all. WE are the problem. SO STOP BITCHING!!