"About The Superficial
The Superficial is a brutally honest look at society and its obsession with the superficial. It is not satire. It is not social commentary. It is the voice of our society at its worst. It is first impressions without sense of social obligation. It is the truth of our generation. It is ugly racism. It is jealousy. It is honest.

Just kidding. Our goal is to make fun of as many people as possible."

Erm... Brutal. And not social commentary at all. Now, where's the section on homecraft? I need to knit me some mittens.

lol, its all it takes man. Its like being a lead singer, you could have warts as big as antlers and hot chicks will still blow you because you covered an 80's pop song.

And they could share the story with thier mom who gang-banged Winger.

Fascinating. There seems to be something about Zach Braff and Mandy Moore that makes people post irrelevant, incoherent comments.

It might be that people would rather think of anything than the idea of Zach Braff or Mandy Moore acting.

Or it might be that people would rather think of anything other than Zach Braff being able to afford a $450,000 ring, let alone being able to check Mandy Moore's oil.

I don't know why celebs even plan to get married, cuz it NEVER LASTS!! But anyways...does she really want to wake up for the next couple years,next to a guy that has a constipated look on his face all the time? I guess when you get a ring like that , it kinda just makes you overlook that huh?

well I think it's cute!

Anyhoo, when they divorce, Zach can be famous for a) having a sexy ex-wife b) actually being talented (I think he actually is a telented guy). Surely that's A list celeb status for life?? Most of them seem to get by just using point a) as a means for getting twice their 15 minutes.

It'll never last. His preference for indie tunes and her past in bubblegum pop are totally incompatible.

He looks like a Muppet. Or a Fraggle. How long before she notices the "Property of Jim Henson, Inc." label stitched to his back.

Man it stings when you look back on a "regular" engagement ring purchase when the engagement doesn't work out. How will Zach feel after spending $450,000 on a ring that will eventually mean nothing???? Do I sound bitter?

im just like writting comments... yes i am mentally stable, yes i am too cool 4 words, no sry im not single

that lucky bastard she is HOT. i'd knock it down in a new york minute.

They've been going out for 18 months? That's roughly the amount of time that Zach has been overacting to the point of annoyance on Scrubs. Please Zach, go look at season one, and then season 5, it's like night and day. How can an actor FORGET to act?

He's like that John Ritter type. I actually liked Mandy Moore in "Saved" cuz she was SUCH a bitch in that movie. I liked how she could tap into that cunt mode so smoothly. She's cool in my book. He's ok, in that goofy, lost-puppy kind of way.

I am happy for them. I like them both.
Donna A.

I have no feelings either way. These two aren't majorly interesting to me either in a celebrity kind of way or a train wreck kind of way. Just both kind of boring. I think Mandy needs a Meth addiction and Zach should sleep with Clay Aiken. That would spice things up a bit.

I like them both and good for them. However, isn't Mandi Moore a serial engagement artist? Or am I confusing her in that episode she did with Adrian Grenier in "Entourage?"

I heart Zach Braff. *sigh*

Well if a goofy looking dude can get someone as hot as Mandy then I have high hopes ^_^

Well, Zach Braff obviously has *something* going for him to pull off THAT hookup. I have no idea who this guy is other than the mention of "Scrubs," but more power to him. Get it while you can, Zach, and give her a snakey little lick for me while you're down there.

Maybe we had this Damien, Hell spawn baby all wrong. Braff is too nice and Mandy Moore is too nice, so the obvious baby they;d have is the son of Satan. It'd be too obvious if it was J-Lo's kid, so it'd have to be the nice Jewish guy...am I wrong? I gavult!

why is it that when mandy has pictures with her boyfriends they always look so stunned/scared?

i CANNOT imagine why she broke up with andy roddick, after having seen this photo:

http://www.freshtribe.com/media/view/andy_roddick_mandy_moore.aspx

These are excruciatingly boring people. Mandy is beautifully boring while Zach is pale, chubby-faced Ray Romano boring.

What's up with the hot girls and the dorky ugly Jewish guys? Is there some kind of ancient Hebrew black magic/love potion that I should be aware of?

Seeing these two hugging on each other kinda makes me think of a mom and baby koala at the zoo... Looking all sweet and cute. Aren't they cute? And then the baby needs bacteria, so it bends down, right as the mom is pooing, and munches up the caca right as it playdoughs out her mom's ass...still hot and steamy... Kinda like a warm poo milkshake from Sonic, only it's from a Koala's asshole instead of a milkshake machine...and it's shit, instead of a dairy product. They really SEEM cute, but there's really nasty gross stuff happening when they're together, I'm sure. Like a troll mounting a princess. Like the thought of the late Milton Burle having sex with...well...anyone... Or something like that.

HollyJ...

Shut up.

Seriously. Shut up. Could you be more stupid?

Guess she's counting on his family connections to keep her working after the teen pop things dies shortly.

You know how those eye-talians stick together in Hollywood.

Webster dictionary defines The Superficial as:

(n)- the best f-ing place in the world to talk about koala shit.

Oh, ok.

Hee Haw obviously lacks sense of humor and originality and therefore should be BANNED from further Superficial usage until he can write up no less then 3 witty responses that are original and make someone laugh out load. With a name like Hee Haw though, I sense this to be an immpossible feat.

WORD lysistrata11. WORD!

That is a nasty photo.

Wow, I'm surprised at the lack of enthusiasm here, people. I am crazy about Zach Braff and Mandy Moore seems like a nice gal (in a pretentious, American way).

#30: oh come on, wouldn't you want your own boyfiend to be grabbing your tits in public? surefire way to know he loves you.

oh, my bad... shaun's probably a guy.

but anywho, that's a tip for ladies out there: if you want to gauge how much your partner loves you, count how many times they squeeze your tits in public. ass-spanking counts, too.

Oh man. If only I had known that my perv ex-boyfriend had been so in love with me...

Is it just me, or does he have an enormous bubble head?

Oh that heads enormous HollyJ. I should know, having a gigantic cranium myself. I'm guessing a 7 3/4 -6/8 hat size. We're talking custom made.

Zach Braff is the biggest A-Hole you couold meet. I love it when people are so stupid and believe that he's act like his "character" on Scrubs, when he's the complete opposite.
Hell, If you saw the episode of PUNK'D where he threatens to beat a little kid, well that's the real Zach Braff...

#37: yeap, he was a total butthole in that one. that's why i kinda like punk'd - certain situations show you what those celebrities are really like.

He will end up like jennifer garners first husband..completely forgotten. But I wouldnt mind being forgotten if I could sleep with Mandy Moore for any length of time.

She is perfect

You guys, it's JD. JD! He's AWESOME. Who cares if he's an asshole in real life? Come on, we're supposed to be SUPERFICIAL here. JD is funny, therefore Zach Braff (that's JD's name, right?) must be funny. Even if he has molested young donkeys, why should we care? For example, we love Angelina Jolie for her hotness - nobody seems to care that she's a husband-stealing blood drinker who has actually let Billy Bob Thornton's PENIS inside her. We're superficial and she's hot, end of story. And Zach Braff makes me chuckle. Ha.

At least they dated for 18 months instead of the typical 3 weeks before getting hitched that many stars do. My take is that both are more grounded than the typical actor/actress. This will probably last longer than most but you still have that problem of actors getting together with others while ona set and falsely fall in lust with each other.

If you really want to have nightmares, just imagine what Zach's face looks like when he cums. That will scare you straight.

REgardless, congrats to the both of them and I hope they have a long and fruitful marriage.

There seems to be a latent and sometimes blatant anti-semetic tone used when insulting Jews like Zach Braff and Natalie Portman, especially from the moronic lady who goes by the name "HollyJ", and I'm not sure what the relevancy of it is. Braff happens to be a rising, talented actor who happens to be Jewish. Oh, and he's engaged to someone who many agree is a very attractive woman. Why do we have to use his religion as a way to pounce on him? Clearly, many of you are jealous of his situation so you attempt to bring him down to size. You can hate his work all you want but leave his religion out of it.

Zach is a babe let's hope he's gay too

THE WORD #42, c'mon brotha, they all just plya hatin. They know that the jews got the mojo, and they jealous. Racism is the sincerest form of flattery.

Mandy is by far the most normal and likeable of the late 90's pop princesses (Britney, Jessica, Christina). I've always thought she was the most naturally attractive too. Even if she looked a bit beefy in "Chasing Liberty."

She's not a revolutionary singer but her voice is nice. Her acting is nothing special but serviceable. I guess it makes her boring to be so normal.

She's also known to be somewhat religious. I give it 3 more years tops before she joins some newly fashionable cult and gets busted for indecent liberties with a duck-billed platypus.

LOL @ #24...*very* descriptive!

This is such crap. I don't like Mandy Moore's songs or acting, even though she was good in "Saved." She was good b/c she was playing someone who was completely unlike her. I think Zach Braff is hilarious & he did a really spectacular job with "Garden State" in writing, directing, and starring in it. How the HELL does she get these hot or talented boyfriends? I don't get it! She went to high school right by where I live now. Everyone said she was an uncool nerd (of course) and now she's got a smart/funny guy. She must have crack on her hooha to keep them coming back. Damn it.

@42 The Word - Wow, you're fllled with all /kinds/ of mishagas, aren't you?

I'm happily married to a JEW and have two wonderful children with him. My sister-in-law is a Rebbee. Your "anti-semetic" theory blows.

BTW Being a "Jew" isn't /just/ a religion. It's a lineage, a People, based on the line of Abraham through Isaac. Arabs descend from Isaac's brother Ischmael. Take a history lesson.

You have no idea whether or not Braff's "religious," but religious or not, he's still Jewish.

I find it interesting that you automatically assume I'm being insulting when I refer to someone as a Jew. I never said anything to imply that being a Jew was a bad thing--but YOU just did. Interesting...

I could've said "angry lesbian eskimo." But I didn't. Because she's not an eskimo. She's a Jew. If she'd been white, I probably would've put "angry lesbian honky" or even gotten all CRAZY and put "angry lesbian protestant," since I'm a WASP.

Offended by that too? Probably. Who cares?

What's to be done with people who think like you do--People who think that referring to someone as a Jew is a put-down... Oy vey! Nothing ever changes!

John Ritter once shagged a chick for 9 hours.

Ok I am NOT seeing any HollyJ Jew diss on Zach Braff. That was the Superficial comment bringing up the Jewish thing. Get your facts straight before you start waggling your gnarled finger and pointing "The Word"! >=o
I suggest you go feed you cats and leave the funny posts to the obvious experts.

The Natalie comment was hilarious btw HollyJ. ^5

Wow. So you're a married woman with two kids who talks about steaming hot koala shit. That's almost as bad as someone who defends another's religion or as you pointed out the obvious, one's lineage. Oh wait a second...he was trying to say something nice about a person. Thanks for that clarification b/c apparently all non-Jews know absolutely nothing about Judaism. Why don't you just take that nice steaming pile of koala shit and find a good use for it. The Word was only trying to tell folks that it's not okay to call someone a Jewish dweeb. Which, it isn't. Religion (and okay, sure, lineage) shouldn't be a dart to throw at someone on The Superficial. So why don't you calm down a little, step away from the keyboard, and keep the entire history of Judaism and your family to yourself sweetheart. Oh by the way, very nice of you to throw in a good old "oy vey" to try to add some credibility to your comments.

Oh HollyJ, you show such flaming wit preaching your 2nd grade knowledge of a religion that you know nothing about(despite your marriage to a Jewish man)and including such Jewish catch-phrases as "oy-vey" to punctuate your credentials.

You make a point to emphasize that if Natalie Portman was "white", you could refer to her as an "angry lesbian honkey". But no, "she's a Jew". Here, you show your glaring ignorance. Portman was born in Israel. That is her nationality: Israeli She also happens to be Jewish, her RELIGION. No matter how you try to spin it, there IS a difference. My parents, both Polish Jew immigrants encountered such lunacy in Poland when upon discovering my parents were Jewish, they would reply "But I thought you were Polish??". They are Polish Jews. Anybody can convert to Judaism whether they're white, black, red, yellow, or any other color under the rainbow.

As for your assertion that referring to someone as Jewish isn't insulting, you're absolutely right. As #51 eloquently put it, its not using the word Jewish that makes it an insult, it's the manner in which it is use. The manner that suggests the Jewishness is a mitigating factor in degrading part of one's personality. When superficial writers(usually a laugh-riot) refer to the Braff-Moore relationship as an "awkward-looking Jewish dweeb dating a young, beautiful girl", the first sentence demeaning Braff is meant to counteract the second sentence complementing Moore. So yes, the word Jewish here is used as another drawback to Braff along with being 'awkward looking' and a 'dweeb' which is unnecessary and YES, anti-Semetic. Same with your characterization of Portman as being close to being an "angry Jewish lesbian".

I'm not trying to pick at all ignificant details. I'm just speaking out when I notice an improper offensive tone that is disguised as humor. Anyway, I'd rather listen to a Mandy Moore album than continue engaging in a war of words with a married woman whose comedic fantasies involve "koala shit" and G-d knows what else. I've made my point. And if you truly feel using one's religion as a means of degradation of their character, then I suggest looking in the mirror, and evaluating your motives.

I think I just fell in love with The Word.