January 11, 2006
Angelina Jolie is officially pregnant
People magazine has confirmed that Angelina Jolie is indeed pregnant with Brad Pitt's kid.
"Yes, I'm pregnant," Jolie told a charity aid worker in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic, Monday. The pregnancy has since been confirmed by representatives of both stars.
It seems strangely fitting that Angelina's first biological child would come from Brad Pitt and not one of her previous guy friends. It's almost as if her DNA was smart enough to reject Billy Bob Thornton's sperm and wait it out for a more suitable candidate. One who was voted "sexiest man alive", and not "most likely to marry his cousin."
Angelina Jolie Pregnant [People]
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Comments
1. Posted by LoneWolf on January 11, 2006 05:41 PM
Ah, the Queen of Reinvention has been inseminated. Now Maddox will have someone to french kiss at some future awards ceremony. Except it will only be a half-sib, therefore not nearly as sensational as when Mommy did it with her bro.
For years people have been getting into Angie's p@ssy. Now we'll finally have someone who'll be getting out.
2. Posted by Tania on January 11, 2006 05:43 PM
I LOVED the last paragraph of this item. Very funny!
And thank you for not using the word "preggers"....it's so annoying!
3. Posted by Binky on January 11, 2006 05:43 PM
Thank the Lord those Brokeback Mountain commenters finally left !
4. Posted by Fred Facker on January 11, 2006 05:48 PM
I wonder if she'll have that lingering ripple-belly after the pregnancy. That'll look sexy in all her Tombraider sequels.
5. Posted by brattwoman on January 11, 2006 05:53 PM
It's not so much that I am speechless it's just I have no idea what to think, say, feel, about this
6. Posted by RedJenny on January 11, 2006 05:54 PM
I'm happy for them.
As far as the score I think Brad is winning. He's got a hot girlfriend he impregnated and all Jen has is the public sympathy, which is drying up.
Go Team Pitt!
7. Posted by Leslie on January 11, 2006 05:58 PM
I would really love to know how Angelina avoided confronting this issue until like five months into her pregnancy. She's got to be atleast 4.5 months along at this point, look at her stomach! It's not like she's FAT and you wouldn't notice, and she's not like this introverted never-seen-in-the-public-eye person! What is going ON these days!
8. Posted by elle* on January 11, 2006 05:59 PM
they would make good parents -- they are so hot together haha! too bad for jen...
9. Posted by hafaball on January 11, 2006 05:59 PM
It is very odd she never got preggers with Throton's kid...which can only mean one thing, as The Superficial has said before, they must of always done it...in the butt...
10. Posted by Leslie on January 11, 2006 05:59 PM
Oh man, and it totally figures she'd reveal her huge star pregnancy to a random Spanish aid worker in the DOMINICAN REPUBLIC. Lol.
11. Posted by daffne on January 11, 2006 06:09 PM
This little girl will be so pretty...and crazy too!!!(Yes, I'm sure the baby willbe a girl!!)
12. Posted by BrendaPayne on January 11, 2006 06:18 PM
What will this baby turn out to be? Aboriginal, Arabic, Hispanic maybe? This woman is so weird, her babies all pop out of her different races!
13. Posted by Captain Awesome on January 11, 2006 06:37 PM
"For years people have been getting into Angie's p@ssy. Now we'll finally have someone who'll be getting out."
lol
14. Posted by Dee on January 11, 2006 06:41 PM
Good for them. I'm sick of people acting like Aniston was wronged, Im glad her ass got dumped. The guy wants children, she kept putting it off-what did she think was going to happen? Hey Jen-there's more to life then your hair.
The people who are so militant about her are annoying woman who were screwed over by men, or just man haters in general. I hated her on that stupid show and all her movies are terrible.
15. Posted by Dee on January 11, 2006 06:43 PM
And to post #7-she is not 4.5 months pregnant-I am 4.5 months pregnant and my stomach is MUCH bigger then hers. She's about 3 months.
16. Posted by WaitWhat? on January 11, 2006 06:44 PM
I guess there's a new trend in Hollywood now -- get pregnant ASAP and then figure out if it's a life-long commitment. Awesome...especially for all the children involved.
17. Posted by here on January 11, 2006 06:47 PM
Butt-baby Jolipitt, we salute you.
18. Posted by Rocknrope on January 11, 2006 06:50 PM
Wait....so, are they going out?
19. Posted by Ireland on January 11, 2006 07:00 PM
Dee ... I'm thinking there's a high probability that you and Ms. Jolie are dramatically different people. Therefore, her pregnancy may be in no way similar to yours. It is very common in a first pregnancy for a woman not to show until her 20th week. So it is anybody's guess how far along she is.
20. Posted by ~S.Starr~ on January 11, 2006 07:04 PM
Dee: Shut the hell up...you sound like a 12 year old...(which I hope you aren't since you said you are 4.5 month pregnant). Next time you make a comment make sure it either funny or intelligent. If it isn't either...keep it in your head.
21. Posted by Layne on January 11, 2006 07:05 PM
I remember an interview I saw where she said (her own words) that she would never have her own children. There were too many orphans who needed homes.
Brad must be one superb guy...
22. Posted by MortyFishbein on January 11, 2006 07:10 PM
I am aos bummed out by this news. It's like finding out that sea monkeys are really just brine shrimp. The grief is THAT bad. I feel like a little piece of childhood is gone.
Before, she was a crazy, whacked-out, hot-as-shit girl who had deep feelings, could basically LIVE in a charcter she played and said and did as she pleased.
But as time went on she became less shocking, more ethereal. No more kissy face with brother. No more dirty old man husband. No more fueding through publicists with father. No more jumping on couches and declaring love for Jenny Shmizu on Oprah. Wait, that last thing didn't happen to her . . .
Anyway, when she adopted kids it seemed like she was just playing house, playing make believe. Making a little Josephine Baker-esque tribe at home. Then Brad came along and decided he wanted to play house too. He even wanted to play "Tarzan & Jane" on a Kenyan resort on the Serengeti. Then, somewhere in between adopting kids from anywhere and playing house, things became too real.
Now she's going to have a real child of her own and it will make her change 360 degrees. Oh Jesus, I'm gonna be sick . . . .
THIS BULLSHIT RELATIONSHIP WITH BRAD PITT IS TURNING HER INTO NORMAL WOMAN!
Goddamnit, Butters . . .
23. Posted by Cheyenne_1 on January 11, 2006 07:15 PM
Angelina Jolie quotes:
"To be intimate with a married man, when my own father cheated on my mother, is not something I could forgive."
If you cheat on somebody, I don't agree with you. If you hurt somebody or damage somebody? You're not OK in my book. And you're never going to be, period."
"I never liked being touched ever. People used to say that I held my breath when they were hugging me. I still do. But I've never liked...Everybody thought I was really sexual." (poor Brad)
... and then there was the quote about how she would never have her own. biological kids because of teh orphans that need adopting, or something...
Ah, poor AJ. Actually, I feel sorry for her kids.
24. Posted by nikki on January 11, 2006 07:15 PM
to #14: my sentiments exactly.
to add to what you said -- in point of fact, Maniston has also hooked up with a male co-star, but somehow no-one seems bothered by this or has wondered when exactly they got linked up. hmmmm...
25. Posted by spamnews on January 11, 2006 07:17 PM
Morty: "on a Kenyan resort on the Serengeti" That'd be the Massai Mara. There's no Serengeti in Kenya. That'd be Tanzania.
Anyway, maybe she upped the number of weeks she's pregnant so she can have one of those quicky hollywood premature births so she doesn't deform her body too much.
Come to think of it her pregnant boobs ontop of her silicon boobs will be two wonders of the world. I can't wait.
26. Posted by YouProablbySuck on January 11, 2006 07:28 PM
Oh geeze.
Here we go with the Team Aniston supporters. You must really hate Jolie to name off a number of quotes she's said in the past. I would do the same with Aniston, but I have a life.
I loved theSuperficial's take on it:"It's almost as if her DNA was smart enough to reject Billy Bob Thornton's sperm and wait it out for a more suitable candidate. One who was voted "sexiest man alive", and not "most likely to marry his cousin."
LOL! So damn true.
27. Posted by Shaun on January 11, 2006 07:29 PM
Its good that Brad Pitt put one in the oven. Out of all people, Angelina Jolie gave him the privilege to. I don't think puppet face Aniston even cares. She is set in her ways and when she is ready to get knocked up she will. The hype won't even be as close as B.P and A.J. though.
It would be a real kick in the teeth if Angelina called Aniston and asked her if she wanted to be the God Mother. :D - Jolie is twisted so I can see her doing that.
28. Posted by Tha-Flash on January 11, 2006 07:54 PM
He FUCKED her, damn him!
29. Posted by VinSlayer on January 11, 2006 08:28 PM
It's official.Team Pitt won!
What do you mean it's not a game and three children's lives are at stake. That just takes the fun out of it.
Please let J.A. (Jackass Aniston) know that when you have a hot, wealthy, nice guy (by all accounts) that loves you and wants you to bear his children, it's not a good idea to keep stringing him along for four years with one day, in the future, some time I may want to have a child. Trust me, your career isn't that big a deal. And no one is buying that Vince Vaughn re-bound crap. Since Brad and Vince worked together, do you think they might be comparing notes about you?? Heck, come to think of it Brad probably owes Vince a six-pack for keeping Jennifer distracted!
30. Posted by twodollartricks on January 11, 2006 08:28 PM
Why was Jen GQ's woman of the year? She couldn't even keep her man!
31. Posted by HollyJ on January 11, 2006 08:33 PM
That will either be the most beautiful child that ever was, or so fucking ugly that it peels paint.
Two beautiful people rarely spawn anything in-between.
I'm curious how she'll be with her adopted kids once this genetically-attached one comes along. Progesterone does some crazy shit to the brain.
32. Posted by violence in movies and sex on tv on January 11, 2006 08:35 PM
Things I hate
1. Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt news
2. People who care about Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt news
3. People who call Jennifer Aniston "Jen"
4. Jennifer Aniston
5. That picture of Mischa Barton's vagina oozing all over her sweatpants
33. Posted by davina85 on January 11, 2006 08:52 PM
it basically comes down to the fact that jennifer was too selfish to have a child with the man she apparently loved enough to marry. Brad made his wishes extremely clear, and she definately wasn't getting any younger. So what if Jolie was a little wild when she was younger...I've never once heard any serious allegations such as drugs. The viles of blood and knives simply add to the mystique. Angelina will be an excellent mother and brad will be an amazing father. (god knows he has waited long enough)
oh and to spammnews that comment about her breasts was really uncalled for...my guess is you're either a homosexual man or an envious woman.
34. Posted by HughJorganthethird on January 11, 2006 09:48 PM
I told him to go anal just to be safe but he just wouldn't listen. Now look at him. If she turns out to look like Britney after her kid I will personaly kill Brad Pitt with my sagging, Angelina-less penis.
35. Posted by GET OVER IT on January 11, 2006 09:50 PM
Look, hot people need to be with other hot people. Then they can have hot sex and make hot babies. If you losers can't handle that, then you need to jerk off to some more internet porn with a bucket of greasy friend chicken, cuz we all know that's what you do all day and all night!
Everybody is on Jennifer Aniston's side cuz she's the ugly girl next door who found plastic surgery and got lucky with a meal-ticket like Brad Pitt. I mean come on! We all know he felt sorry for her. Then he got tired of her needy, crying, whining, emotional, "I need to prove to people that I'm not Rachel so let me make more movies", chain-smoking, how did I end up with Brad Pitt, phony ass. She's not a threat cuz anyone can date her, even the butcher and cab-driver across the street. She's the girl you feel sorry for cuz she's always crying and feeling sorry for herself and telling personal secrets, even to the cashier at the grocery store. And there no party like a pity party! "I have low self-esteem and daddy issues, waaa waaa! Me Me Me! Waaa waaa! Boo hoo! Me me me!"
Hey, if Brad wants kids, he gets kids. He wants to be a daddy, he gets to be a daddy. And don't hate Angelina cuz she's hot and rich, Oscar winner, mother of two adoptive children and UN GoodWill Ambassador that donates millions to charities. Deep down inside, you all know that's the kind of woman he should be with. The type that makes you look and feel like shit cus she sooo way out of your loser league. And she has a heart. The rest of you can kiss their rich, hot ass and go back to stalking that person who dumped you years ago. Better yet, call Jennifer Aniston. She'll probably answer the phone with "Me me me! Boo hooo! Waa waaa! Me me me!"
36. Posted by davina85 on January 11, 2006 09:53 PM
get over it= pure genius
37. Posted by Captain Awesome on January 11, 2006 10:05 PM
Greasy friend chicken is so good. It's even better with a side of best friend fries and an ugly friend shake.
38. Posted by pixel killya on January 11, 2006 10:09 PM
"And don't hate Angelina cuz she's hot and rich, Oscar winner, mother of two adoptive children and UN GoodWill Ambassador that donates millions to charities. Deep down inside, you all know that's the kind of woman he should be with."
Well to be honest, I'm thinking that's the kind of woman that 'I' should be with, not Brad. Oh and saw a clip of Aniston the other day on the short-lived Ferris Bueller show. Damn she was horrid...fat ass and no bleached blonde tresses...no wonder she was playing the wallflower that no one wanted anything to do with. A real plain-jen with a voice that could peal the chrome of my mags.
39. Posted by nikki on January 11, 2006 10:24 PM
GET OVER IT: dude you rock!!!! :-)
40. Posted by Sheva on January 11, 2006 10:43 PM
Not to spoil the parade, but didn't Aniston deny that she was holding out on having a baby.
Guess I'm not up on the saga but that's what I thought she claimed. And all the Jolie theft stuff: wasn't that after the marriage was over?
Okay, sorry to be a slow poke on the gossip trail
41. Posted by Dee on January 11, 2006 10:46 PM
Posted by ~S.Starr~ on January 11, 2006 07:04 PM
Dee: Shut the hell up...you sound like a 12 year old...(which I hope you aren't since you said you are 4.5 month pregnant). Next time you make a comment make sure it either funny or intelligent. If it isn't either...keep it in your head.
Are you one of the dumped middle aged housewives who got dumped be her husband so you fully support 'team aniston'. Get a life looser-if you read the other comments you'd see most people don't like Maniston.
42. Posted by existonz09 on January 11, 2006 10:49 PM
ok she just told me she is 3weeks 4days pregnant as of today.
i am happy for her
43. Posted by blackblackheart on January 11, 2006 11:00 PM
hurray Angelina! I love Angelina Jolie! ^_^ yay~~~
I'm happy that she finally gets to experience pregnancy. She is such a good person. If you knew people who lived in Cambodia, you'd know what I was talking about, but since you probably don't, shut the fuck up and let Jenifer Aniston fight her own battles, she's handled this pretty pathetic anyway. >_<
44. Posted by suzy on January 11, 2006 11:07 PM
those adopted kids are gonna need therapy for a long time!!
lol... and all of them are gonna be around the same age... she's gonna wanna give em all up by the time they're 6 lol
ah well... jolie-pitt kids got it made
45. Posted by Edie on January 11, 2006 11:26 PM
I have officially become sorry for Jennifer Aniston.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have the Debbie Reynolds of the new century.
46. Posted by celeb_hater on January 11, 2006 11:56 PM
Two unmarried people fucking and producing a kid that will end up being raised in a dysfunctional family setting. How proud Brad and Angelina must be. And let's not forget that BRad will have to share ANgelina since she also likes to dabble with women. What a bunch of classless and selfish pieces of shit they are. No wonder why Angelina's father kept telling everyone his daughter if fucked in the head and needs help.
47. Posted by PhDiva on January 12, 2006 12:19 AM
What about poor little Zahara??? What about the tragic racial/national/genetic politics of the a)non-white b)non-American (by birth) c)adopted children who are goig to have to compete with this white(mostly because Angelina's Native American) biological American(ish because Angelina's Canadian) child? Zahara's going to be one of those totally messed up middle children whose parents had another siblig too soon. This is depressing.
On another note: Stop feeling bad for Jennifer Aniston. She is extremely lucky. She's a plain-faced, mediocre actress who has gotten more than her 15 minutes of fame and lots of money, which she will earn forever because Friends will never be off the air. Brad dropped her when Friends ended because she was no longer America's sweetheart. He traded up. Didn't she realize she was living with an asshole before he left her? She knows what business she's in. Angelina will dump him for a man with a brain, and Jen will have the last laugh. But Angelina has brains, beauty, fame, wealth. She's holding all of the cards and all the babies, too.
48. Posted by Jenny on January 12, 2006 01:04 AM
I don't think people feel bad for Jennifer Aniston really. I mean they say they do, but who everybody really feels bad for is themselves. We can't stand the thought that we get old and less attractive. It's sad. So of course we side with Jen. It's some kind of weird defense mechanism. It's worse for girls cause, obviously, Brad Pitt can get older and still be considered hot. It sucks.
49. Posted by YouProablbySuck on January 12, 2006 01:25 AM
Why are the kids going to need thearpy again?
Because their parents did some crap before they were even in the picture?
I'd hate to see some of the crap in your parent's closets....
50. Posted by Tania on January 12, 2006 01:32 AM
When did having a child become LESS of a commitment than getting married?
51. Posted by GET OVER IT on January 12, 2006 02:13 AM
How's this for depressing? Baby Zahara would be sold or starve to death if left in Ethiopia. Maddox would would be sold or starve to death if left in Cambodia. You idiots are worried about race issues and pre-marital pregnancy? Is this the best you can do? These children's own biological parents couldn't even care for them! They're probably dead, in prison or prostituting themselves for a cup of rice.
These kids are going to grow up and realize they hit the lotto. Just like Nicole Richie. Their adoptive parents are rich and famous. Even if Brad and Angelina split up, there's no parent-child pre-nup. This is better than the lotto...there's no taxes. Therapy my ass. The only therapy they're going to need is when a biological family member from overseas writes them a letter, begging for money. And they won't know how to say "F*uck off!" in their native language.
52. Posted by YouProablbySuck on January 12, 2006 02:22 AM
^ Damn.
I couldn't have said it any better myself.
53. Posted by Leslie on January 12, 2006 03:12 AM
GET OVER IT: You are a fucking genius.
54. Posted by Leslie on January 12, 2006 03:13 AM
GET OVER IT: Good for you! Damn straight.
55. Posted by Captain Awesome on January 12, 2006 04:32 AM
"These kids are going to grow up and realize they hit the lotto. Just like Nicole Richie."
There's a sure-fire way to prove they will grow up just fine.
joy!
56. Posted by TeamLacheyRools on January 12, 2006 05:13 AM
I dont know what all the fuss is about, she has the commitment quotient of a plankton - it'll all be over before she has the baby anyways
57. Posted by AmberDextrose on January 12, 2006 05:48 AM
Did anyone else follow the People link?
I had a nice Beavis & Butthead moment sniggering at the link entitled: "Tori flashes her ring"
58. Posted by i eat coins on January 12, 2006 06:10 AM
Im gonna go Miss Cleo on your asses:
Pitt = Saggitarius/Rabbit
Jolie = Gemini/Rabbit (12 yrs apart)
Anniston = Aquarius/Monkey
The reason why Brad and Jennifer "fell in love" is because Saggitarius and Aquarius are very compatible when it comes to friendship and work. Not so much with marriage.
But his Rabbit side, was too responsible, and stable for Jennifer's Monkey side which needed continual mental/physical stimulation. They probably bored each other to death, but kinda forced the relationship because of the comfort/compatibility of their Aquarius and Sagitarius signs, and that there may have been actual love there.
Brad and Angelina's Sagitarius and Geminis signs are also compatible. Sags like to be free and Geminis like to travel. And since they are both Rabbits (catalysts signs), they understand each other better than the Monkey/Rabbit combo.
This is just 1/3 of the reasons why their relationship works (chemistry). 2/3 is love, which I don't know is real. 3/3 are other factors, like environment, circumstances, etc.
Hahahah...OK I'll stop now.
59. Posted by twodollartricks on January 12, 2006 06:23 AM
It's official!! Brad's publicist has confirmed they are dating and she IS pregnant! At least, that's what imdb are reporting... Hurray! I can't wait to see what "oh-woe-is-me" act Jennifer pulls now.
60. Posted by slinkhard on January 12, 2006 06:27 AM
'The guy wants children, she kept putting it off-what did she think was going to happen?'
Wow, what a great attitude towards women your future child will have, Dee.
And everyone else with spouting the same bullshit sexist rhetoric.
God, this is forcing me into defending Jennifer 'My One Talent is my Hair' Aniston, and I don't like that one bit.
61. Posted by jonweed on January 12, 2006 06:31 AM
why is it that everything the tabloids say turns out to be true, but only if it is something the people it was about denied hahahaha! now we know when something is true. I don't understand the whole "Brangelina" worship thing tho, they're all right, but not the best in the world. Brad Pitts plain looking and Angelina Jolie is hot, but not super good-looking. She mostly has it in attitude. And whoever said being rich is good, I laugh. You've obviously never been a rich kid. But anyways, I guess now we can confirm that Britney and Kevin are indeed breaking up because they keep denying it. I just find it fascinating how fast some celebrities get pregnant. My homie and his wife have been trying for almost a year now, and they have sex about three times a day! Do you think they get any sort of fertility help?
62. Posted by julema on January 12, 2006 08:14 AM
I can,t believe how many people say stupid things... Don't you think that Brad and Angie care of what stupid people think of them!? Angelina is a good person, she did strange things in her life but it's her life! They are in love and theyre gonna have a hot baby, theyre gonna love all there children adopt or not, because saying stuff like : zahara and maddox gonna need therapy because the biological baby goona have all the love! Hey you must don't have any children to say that! More children you have, more love you have... You can have 10 children, you gonna love them all! Good for them! Brad wanted so much children! He must be so happy! And Angie too!
63. Posted by VanillaSalTyBaLLs on January 12, 2006 09:16 AM
mmmmmmm greasy friend chicken!!!! Oh and a note to Brad - the sperm goes on the outside of the female so she'll look like a delicious glazed cruller!!!
64. Posted by OtherwiseOccupied on January 12, 2006 09:25 AM
I hope they're both happy. Any of you who have ever had a single moment of wildness in you will know that it takes one hell of a man to tame a wild woman... Brad must be one hell of a man.
I'm gonna have to agree with everyone that says that the homely I've-been-dumped-for-a-hotter-younger-chic folks side with Maniston.
It makes sense because people are by nature jealous and insecure. Jealous of someone skinnier, prettier, younger, more successful than you are - so you just automatically bristle up when you see something good happen to one of those people.
Reminds you of just how crappy your own life is.
Aside from good hair, a caricature-ish face, and a fugly old fat boyfriend, what does Maniston really have?
65. Posted by Tracie on January 12, 2006 11:18 AM
Question: "Aside from good hair, a caricature-ish face, and a fugly old fat boyfriend, what does Maniston really have?"
Answer: More luxury, lifestyle, and millions than most of us will ever see in our entire lifetimes. Jennifer could just do us all a favor and retire, spend even more time on the beach than she already does, and leave the acting to those that are actually good at the craft.
And as far as Brad and Angelina are concerned, let's hope whatever the heck they're doing leads to something useful, like increased awareness of the plights of children around the world, rather than thoughts of what the baby will look like or who gets to be on top in bed.
66. Posted by vanya_k on January 12, 2006 11:53 AM
Well, it lookslike the Brangelina groupies flooded this item, frantically mastturbating and then spewing their verbal Brangelina worship into posts that make them sound like Scientologists who got a little mixed up about who to worship.
"Team Pitt 'won"?.. oh, puh-lease. That saccharine crap belongs on a different site, unless I hit the wrong URl and didn't go to the clever cynical "mock celebrities" site that I thought I had.
67. Posted by CelebGossipAficionado on January 12, 2006 12:16 PM
Best wishes to Brad and Angelina. To hell with their pasts, they're just two people who want to have a bunch of kids and show them the world (and there is NO ONE in here who can say they're unable to do that). Some folks in here really like bringing up what AJ did a decade ago, but what were YOU doing in your twenties? Whatever it was, does it mean you can't ever be a capable loving parent? I bet it doesn't. So I'm afraid you're gonna have to let her Thornton days go. Because while she's cleaning up and loving her life, you're just reading about her in People while you stand in line at Vons.
Feel sorry for Aniston? Hell no. That woman isn't going through anything millions of women (with a lot less money) have gone through. And last I checked, where there is an article on Brad and Angelina, one of Jennifer and Vince isn't far behind. She's not poor, she's not alone, and she's not (that)ugly. She'll be just fine.
So for those of you who've decided to be mad "for" Jennifer because a man has wronged you, take a deep breath and put the magazine down. You'll be fine too.
68. Posted by TeamMe on January 12, 2006 12:45 PM
I hate "Brangelina". I hate that they're publically referred to as Brangelina. But what I despise above all is that I actually care enough to hate Brangelina. However, since I can’t seem to escape hearing or reading about their forthcoming bastard spawn, I feel compelled to tell you all that they’re both a couple of selfish, hypocritical assholes whose absurdity is exceeded only by their vanity.
AJ…of course she’s hot, but “talented” is a stretch. So she got an Oscar for playing a wild, selfish, slutty, fabulously good-looking psycho with an attitude. Of course she did! It was hardly a departure from her norm. Notice that any movie in which she might have ever approached seeming talented she portrays a character that is uncannily similar to her public persona. That's not really talent. That's just showing up. The rest of her movies have been pre-pube porn for the nerd demographic. Brad…great actor, great movies! Apart from that, I never really saw the appeal. His monkey-see-monkey-do mimicry of AJ is childish, tiresome, and down-right sad. Not to mention whipped. (Men, please note that whipped is whipped whether she's a pillow-lipped celeb, or a dowdy, ho-hum housewife.)
Humanitarian my ass. What mother in her right mind is about to allow a man she’s spent less than a year with, and supposedly only started fucking three months ago, adopt her kids? Certainly not a woman who values her children above her whim.
Incidentally, anyone can have kids, and you don't have to be the Sexiest Jerks alive to have good looking ones. Just look at Prince Charles.
69. Posted by sammygirl on January 12, 2006 12:49 PM
I wish Angelina would adopt me! Those children did win the lotto. They avoided a terrible fate that was awaiting them. They are truly blessed. Sure, Angelina had her dysfunction in the past, but so what, she's making up for it now.
I don't think Pitt left Aniston because she didn't want kids. I think he was just bored with her. She seems really, really dull to me. She talked about eating the same damn salad for lunch for 10 years. Talk about being in a rut. That's still not a good excuse for Pitt's behavior, but he strikes me as a pretty weak, fickle dude, so he went with someone more intriguing to him. I'd feel burned too if I were Aniston.
70. Posted by Captain_Pugwash on January 12, 2006 12:53 PM
Since when did adultery become acceptable as long as the couple is "hot"? Pretty superficial....ooops.....sorry.....forgot where I was for a moment.
71. Posted by andrewthezeppo on January 12, 2006 12:53 PM
Another victory for Team Jolie lets look at the scorebored
Team Jolie
Mr. and Mrs. Smith= succesdd
Dating Brad Sexiest man alive Pitt
Cute adopted kids
Plane Flying
Preggers
Team Anniston
Derailed = Flop
Romor Has it= Flop
Dating Vince the flab Vaugn
No kids
Man Jaw
Ugly Nose
72. Posted by twodollartricks on January 12, 2006 01:09 PM
Apparantly, the Jen/Vince relationship is fake anyway.
She's supposed to be his beard and he's supposed to be her "less-attractive-than-Brad-but-doesn't-it-make-her-really-sweet-and-nicer-than-Angelina-for-going-out-with-him" boyfriend. I can imagine it to be true..
73. Posted by vanya_k on January 12, 2006 02:13 PM
Paris Hilton came out as team Jolie, not surprisingly.
'nuff said.
74. Posted by Tania on January 12, 2006 02:22 PM
Dear GETOVERIT and eveyone who agreed w/ post # 51:
You're right that Zahara and Maddox will have a better life than if they were not adopted by Angelina...I get that point. But you really should have picked a better example than Nicole Richie. Unless of course you don't think a heroin addiction and anorexia/bulemia are a problem.
And her adoptive father cares about her so much that he just throws money at her to go out and whore around and go shopping w/ Lindsay Lohan...when maybe if he really loved her he would step in and put her in rehabilitation for her obvious eating disorder.
You're also right that there is no parent-child prenup...that was my point too. You can divorce your spouse but not your children, adopted or not. Parenthood is forever, and unfortunately in most cases, marriage isn't. I wasn't saying that having children out of wedlock is "wrong", it's just that lately celebrities are getting pregnant within mere months of meeting, which they apparently don't think is a big deal...but you ask if they're getting married and you get a 'No! I don't want to jinx what we have going!' What do you think having a baby will do to your relationship? That is the biggest commitment a person can make!!
And having rich and famous parents doesn't automatically make for a happy home life. Ask Nicole Richie, Drew Barrymore, etc.
75. Posted by sammygirl on January 12, 2006 02:53 PM
The dysfunction found in Hollywood families is still better than starving to death or getting sold to some pimp.
76. Posted by daBITCH on January 12, 2006 02:58 PM
Ok, Jokes aside. Lets be serious for a minute:
When do ya think jackass aniston going to kill herself?
77. Posted by nikki on January 12, 2006 03:09 PM
daBITCH: Maniston is waaaaaaay too self-involved to kill herself. can't wait to see who she ends up with after this fake shit with Fat Boy Vince goes kaput.
78. Posted by nikki on January 12, 2006 03:09 PM
daBITCH: Maniston is waaaaaaay too self-involved to kill herself. can't wait to see who she ends up with after this fake shit with Fat Boy Vince goes kaput.
79. Posted by jonweed on January 12, 2006 03:31 PM
Whoever said only homely people side with Jennifer Aniston, I'm gonna go with, mostly people who have been dumped for someone else side with her, not ugly people. As a man, I can personally say, that not all cheating and choosing someone else is because of looks. Guys aren't that shallow, they may like to think they are, but they aren't. Cheating is something that occurs when you aren't happy in your relationship, and aren't communicating with your partner. and just because someone is a celeb, ir doesn't mean they are younger, prettier, and more successful. For some people success means lots of money, for others it means raising their kids right, or even performing well at their job. Either way, I've grown sort of tired of seeing these two in the news, because its been a year. I hope they don't do the same thing with Angelina that they did with Britney, and follow her throughout her entire pregnancy.
80. Posted by Captain_Pugwash on January 12, 2006 04:02 PM
Here's a point that nobody has made yet. Not all cases of cheating are caused by a difficient spouse. Sometimes the (male or female) cheat's inadequacies are the root cause. They can be married to a wonderful person, but cheat because they have no integrity/get bored easily/crave excitement or attention/are immature. Reasons are endless. Quit blaming the spouse (Aniston)...although nobody is perfect.
81. Posted by nikki on January 12, 2006 04:03 PM
Angelina has NOT been courting the media the way Maniston and Britney have.
82. Posted by tess on January 12, 2006 04:12 PM
My prayers go to Jennifer right now. Can we all have a minute of silence to honor all those wasted eggs she kept inside of her. I mean, let's face it: her uterus isn't getting any fresher. Plus, by not using it during her marriage with Brad, she ruined all her chances of having a decent looking baby. Her big chin, squarred jaw and ugly nose won't spare her descency. Those genetic flaws won't be erased before at least 4 or 5 generations. Plus, to add insult to injury, her only marriage prospect is average fat joe Vince Vaughn.
I pity her.
83. Posted by sammygirl on January 12, 2006 04:18 PM
I like Vince Vaughn and I think he'd be a fun boyfriend to have. I know he'd make me laugh and that's better in my book than pretty boy Pitt who probably looks at his reflection every time he passes a mirror.
84. Posted by amypie on January 12, 2006 04:20 PM
I personally hope their baby looks like a troll, not because i think they are unattractive but how funny would it be to have pretty parents carrying around a freakish troll child.
85. Posted by sammygirl on January 12, 2006 04:20 PM
P.S. I wouldn't wish Aniston upon Vince Vaughn, because of all the reasons described so well by blog #35 (so funny)
86. Posted by Stacy on January 12, 2006 06:10 PM
#14...Apparently you have no morals whatsoever!
Anniston isn't losing any supporters. There are alot of people out there that DO have morals and think what her husband did was wrong and what home wrecker did was totally wrong. You're just not one of us...with morals!
Anniston probably didn't want to have a baby with Pitt b/c she knew she couldn't trust the the nasty smelly shit!
Yeah, Pitt & Jolie are perfect for one another. Anniston is better off without him!
87. Posted by sugarplumbaby on January 12, 2006 07:16 PM
I bet Vince Vaughn is a riot.
88. Posted by TJ on January 12, 2006 11:06 PM
#23 - I was wondering if ANYONE remembered anything this mullet mouth said in the past? Probably not as they were too distracted by her wasp attacked lips. Good thing some of us remember all the ridiculous lies she's prattled off over the last few months and are keeping tabs. Good luck to Pitt and Jolie - they will so need it.
89. Posted by TJ on January 12, 2006 11:10 PM
#81 - are you for real? Jolie courts the media continuously - I mean who else would tip off them the way she did when she and Brad went off to Africa? The photographer ADMITTED it! She only ever does a good deed if the camera is pointed in her face. Somehow there's always a "leaked story" about her "humanitarian work" in choosing mail order children and how she's saved them from sure death (Bleurgh!) and visiting third world countries etc. If she didn't want the publicity, she wouldn't get it, there are plenty of stars who do humanitarian work and don't expect a roving posse of cameras to follow them around and put it in the latest trash mag. The girl has the National Enquirer on speed dial if you ask me!!
90. Posted by PhDiva on January 13, 2006 02:29 AM
I stand by my statement (47) about this being potentially damaging for Zahara and Maddox racially and emotionally despite those who think they've won the lotto. Only people who've never had any real money or been around people who do think that wealth solves all problems. Also, I have observed that people of color who are the only non-whites in a white family (due to adoption or being the product of earlier interracial relationships) can be made to feel excluded and inferior regardless of how much money they have. Is there anybody you know who would truly choose wealth over the love of a parent?
But I will give it to Angelina. The timing of Brad's attempts to adopt the existing children was probably soon after she discovered the pregnancy. I would not be surprised if she pushed for this to protect her children from the possibility that he would privilege the biological child over them. Brad is a very shallow person. I think Aniston is overrated and annoying, but he still screwed her over and publicly humiliated in a rather nasty way. When she said hew as "missing a sensitivity chip." That rang strangely true. And he still doesn't get it. Is this man really fit to be a parent? Does he have the depth to love an adopted child as much as a biological child, a non-white child as much as a white child? Angelina probably does. Brad, not so much. And I think Angelina knows it. Hence, her desire to have him adopt her kids.
91. Posted by beachgirl53 on January 13, 2006 04:11 AM
HO-LY-CR-AP!
Lookin forward to seeing how this one turns out. Usually, when you add two seriously hot people together it goes one of two ways...you get a seriously hot kid or a seriously ugly kid (aka, God's little prank on the parents). I'm kind of assuming the former...but secretly hoping for the latter...we shall see...
92. Posted by slinkhard on January 13, 2006 04:54 AM
'It makes sense because people are by nature jealous and insecure. Jealous of someone skinnier, prettier, younger, more successful than you are - so you just automatically bristle up when you see something good happen to one of those people.
Reminds you of just how crappy your own life is.'
You do realise that liking Brangelina has no actual reflection on your own life, right? Preferring two hot celebrities over another less-hot celebrity doesn't mean that *you're* attractive, skinnier, younger or more successful than anyone.
93. Posted by Kitchy on January 13, 2006 09:04 AM
What I want to know is...just how many vials of blood does she plan on wearing around her neck now?? Geesh.. she'll be a good one to have around at a makeshift triage following a horrific car accident!
Also, is Brad sure it's not her brother's baby? Luckily when it is born it will already be smarter than her father. Now THAT'S a blessing!
94. Posted by nikki on January 13, 2006 11:03 AM
surely we can reach 1000 pointless comments on the lifestayle of the rich and whiny?
95. Posted by baileyukelele on January 14, 2006 01:02 AM
I just want a healthy black baby to come out. As black as they come. Blacker, if possible.
Or, you know, Asian or Mexican. Or Canadian.
96. Posted by SaveFerris on January 14, 2006 01:20 AM
Well I do like Jen.. But DAMN!! This is one hot couple! Good luck to the Jolie-Pitt family!
(and hey, who really cares what Jolie said in the past?.. people DO change!)
97. Posted by ir0ny! on January 14, 2006 08:20 PM
Let's look at it this way. Here's another child being brought into the world of Hollywood debauchery, & in a few years (or less), he/she will be having a single parent. He/she will then spend many years of his/her life wondering about the other parent, & wanting to have a regular, normal family with normal mother & father. However, although he/she will find the father somewhat normal, but the mother, he/she will discover, is rather different from other mothers. This will also add to this child's sense of instability. Hmmm... sounds familiar.
Yes, chances are this child is going to grow up bitter, hating the other parent (if not both), getting drunk & high on drugs by the age of 9, wanting to sleep with anyone that they come in close contact with (begun by the age of 11), then finally one day, AJ will have the greatest wish of her life - to share that most beautiful moment & expression of "true love" of her child when they both engage in something which up to now, she has probably only experienced with her brother. But then, of course, at that time, the moment will be "sweeter" because it is now with a child of her own womb, not of her mother's womb. (And don't forget the knives, of course!) Then one day perhaps, AJ, her brother, AND the child could ALL join in on the "family fun" & all three of them can finally discover the wonderful family life they have all been missing since their childhoods! And to complete the picture, why don't AJ just MARRY her brother & have her brother ADOPT her & Brad's son, & now they'll all have the "perfect family," since she's "so in love with him" anyway! Her brother must think this is a beautiful thing anyway! Family love & bonding - what could be better?
DISGUSTING!!!!!!!
So, here is yet another tragedy brought into the universe. I almost wish there would be a miscarriage to prevent this sad tragedy, & Brad would open his eyes & realize that he & Jen made a huge mistake. And now that Jen finally realizes that maybe it would good for her to become a mother (especially since she's getting into that "age" range), maybe they can get back together & have a NORMAL family.
As for AJ the philanthropist (or anyone else making Megabucks & giving away Nanobucks to the "poor & needy") - when these people start living life like the rest of us, shopping economically, overworking & overtired, commuting through traffic, etc. - & then giving away the rest of their earnings, that's when I might call them a "philanthropist." In fact, are not the rest of us all "philanthropists" also? Do we not "donate" our earnings gained through our hard labor to support the lives of these celebs? How many rewards do WE get?
98. Posted by kemb2722 on January 14, 2006 08:45 PM
This is in response to "Irony's" comments, including:
"He/she will then spend many years of his/her life wondering about the other parent, & wanting to have a regular, normal family with normal mother & father. . . Disgusting!"
Yes, there is a chance that Maddox, Zahara, and the little un-named child will grow up to be screwed up. But there is that chance in any family. What about children of criminals? Children of divorced parents? Children of homosexual couples, racially-mixed couples, military parents, etc? All of these children are growing up in "non normal" households, and most of them will turn out okay. What is a normal household? And why would a non-normal one garuntee a fucked up child? Look at Courtney Love and Kurt Cobain's (13 year old?) girl. She is wholesome, happy, conservative, and so 'normal'--and one of her parents commited suicide and the other is a drug addict! I don't think its fair to assume AJ and BP's kids will turn out screwed up, any more than anyone else's kids.
99. Posted by ir0ny! on January 15, 2006 12:14 PM
Yes, there is a chance that kids of other parents grow up screwed up too, & obviously that has happened in our society. However, one advantage that these kids have is that they experience life in a more "realistic" way - & not one where their parent(s) make, in one year, more than the sum total of what we make in our ENTIRE lifetimes! These kids usually can't just get everything that they want, they have to struggle through life, etc. However, judging from many of the outcomes of the kids of Hollywood celebs, few have turned out to be a positive influence for society.
Furthermore, as one can tell from both AJ & her brother, is that they are both genetically predisposed to psychological instability. They are both somewhat neurotic (although they like to express it in an "eccentric" way), & for AJ - after over 20+ years, she is still not fully able to get over her father's cheating on her mom. Ok, so that happened at an impressionable age. But you know what, I've seen that plenty of times in my personal life, some during that "impressionable" age, & I don't have that kind of bitterness or instability. I don't have a need to make myself feel & look like a totally invincible person & one who can overpower any man that I want who comes along my way, just as a defense mechanism against the vulnerability within. I don't have some strange notion of "love," which includes kissing my brother in public (& we-don't-want-to-know-what-else at home), etc. Since both AJ & her brother have this neurotic behavior, chances are that they have both inherited some genetic predisposition to psychological vulnerability. If this were a "dominant" trait in their gene pool, then unfortunately for this new baby, he/she has a 50% or higher chance of getting it too.
And so the story goes on.
100. Posted by leo v on January 15, 2006 03:32 PM
You were on the RADIO!
Just as an FYI you guys were mentioned on NPR's wait wait don't tell me. Check out question number 3.
101. Posted by leo v on January 15, 2006 03:33 PM
Hmm the link didn't go through.
Here it is.
http://www.npr.org/programs/waitwait/archquiz/2006/jan/060114.html
102. Posted by Jayne on January 16, 2006 06:49 PM
#23
bwaahah yes!
103. Posted by evilcookie007 on January 17, 2006 03:41 PM
Jennifer Aniston got lucky when she stumbled over Brad Pitt. She's a shit actress who's characters never vary from Rachel on friends, she's got beady eyes, thin lips, and a big square face. Yeah, it sucks to lose your husband (especially when it's Brad Pitt to Angelina Jolie), but ya know what? It happens every day to millions of people. Deal with it. Angelina may be left of center, but she seems like a basically good, caring person who tries to be a good mother. And Brad Pitt is probably going to be a great father. Look around you - show me two parents who never did anything to fuck up their kids. None of the three will be any less screwed up than anyone else out there...
104. Posted by benjamin01 on January 23, 2006 11:24 AM
Aj's publicist?..is that you?! (#103)
You lost your credibility at "she seems like a basically good, caring person".
Good caring people don't habitually help men cheat on their girlfriends and wives.
105. Posted by lcheney2001 on February 8, 2006 07:51 AM
Come on this sort of thing happens all the time in hollywood...Im sure Jen isnt taking it to bad...besides Vince is a much hotter and from what i have seen much kinder and seems to really care for Jen...You go girl...Finally someone that didnt let Brad pretty boy Pitt get his way.