September 19, 2005
Tori Spelling is single, fellahs. Come and get 'er!
(Oh, I'm sorry. Did that headline make you throw up in your mouth a little?)
"Actress" Tori Spelling, daughter of billionaire producer Aaron Spelling, and her filthy non-billionaire husband Charlie Shanian have reportedly split after a year of marriage.
From what I understand, it seems pretty clear that every time Spelling's husband looked at her, he saw a giant talking bag of money. So I'm going to go ahead and assume that he's finally become suspicious of how a bag of money could drink so much booze and have given him herpes. Because last I checked, money should buy happiness, not cold sores on your man-junk.
Previous Entries
» Emmys, apparently brought to you by Helen Keller» Comment on The Superficial
» Liv Tyler is not skinny
» J.Lo hates animals and Heather Mills McCartney
» Paula Abdul's boyfriend has terrible taste
Comments
1. Posted by Sydney on September 19, 2005 02:12 PM
Well I'm not suprised, who'd stay with her for any amount of money.
Or maybe someone would.
But who am I to judge?
2. Posted by Stacylynnrs on September 19, 2005 02:12 PM
I want my gravy bowl back!!!
3. Posted by Sydney on September 19, 2005 02:12 PM
Ooo. Yay, first comment, how awesome.
4. Posted by Xibalba on September 19, 2005 02:16 PM
*quote*Because last I checked, money should buy happiness, not cold sores on your man-junk.*/quote*
I guess it depends on what you spend your money on... I get cold sores on my mangina all the time... Thanks mom, i want my $50 back!
5. Posted by usuckbananas on September 19, 2005 02:25 PM
What a nasty whore.
6. Posted by Gophergutz on September 19, 2005 02:29 PM
Guess there's not much difference between moneybags and dirtbags when you get right down to it.
7. Posted by Clance-man on September 19, 2005 03:07 PM
If it wasn't for daddy's money and a buttload of plastic surgery, no one would go near her. Personally, I think she was orginally a dude. I wouldn't touch her with your man-junk!
8. Posted by gracieo on September 19, 2005 04:05 PM
maybe k-fed is interested?
9. Posted by goldilocks on September 19, 2005 04:14 PM
Who even is tori spelling? i swear no-one in the UK has heard of her. and by no-one, i mean me.
10. Posted by K-dawg on September 19, 2005 04:27 PM
She is the worst actress we have and what we would call the first Paris Hilton. The only reason she is in movies or anything is because her dad is a producer genius and filthy rich. Tori is just filthy.
11. Posted by WTFweretheythinking? on September 19, 2005 04:31 PM
Thanks, I needed to throw up today.
12. Posted by seminole on September 19, 2005 05:48 PM
well I'm sure there are lots of guys out there looking for a girl with a face like a horse, or a border collie.
13. Posted by sugarplum on September 19, 2005 07:35 PM
It's all well known, when a rich girl has neither good looks nor brains, there's alcohol, the best pal she can get.
14. Posted by sparkydingle on September 19, 2005 07:38 PM
Jesus H. Christ that bitch is ugly. Has anyone told her? Someone find out her number and spring the news on her.
15. Posted by mac2048 on September 19, 2005 08:46 PM
My God. She is an ugly land-beast isn't she?
A year is even too much. The poor fellow deserves a fortune in alimony just for waking up next to that face every morning.
16. Posted by maetl on September 20, 2005 07:23 AM
she is creepy.
creepy like walking down a back alley late at night creepy.
17. Posted by Ms. Dilligaff on September 20, 2005 10:00 AM
Aw, I was really hoping Horseface and some guy could be the one couple to make it work. Between her breakup and Renee's breakup with some other guy, I feel empty inside.
18. Posted by stinkypinky on September 20, 2005 04:49 PM
I just don't understand. If my Dad was as rich as hers I would have had complete reconstructive plastic surgery on my face a long time ago. She looks like a grasshopper.
19. Posted by jfive on September 20, 2005 07:35 PM
why cant she die like the rest of the 90210 cast?lol atleast i assume they all died lol or ended up on the sureal life
20. Posted by Lord Helmet on September 21, 2005 01:24 AM
I'd fuck her and tell her to call me Brandon
21. Posted by Juliette on September 21, 2005 12:35 PM
She has had tons of plastic surgery- there is nothing real about her. I don't know what was worse the before or the after.
22. Posted by debisis on September 22, 2005 12:01 AM
wow. those are some pretty harsh comments. usually posts like these are from jealous assholes or ugly people.
i don't think she's gorgeous, but she looks like a woman and is at least cute. and you're not. author.
23. Posted by debisis on September 22, 2005 12:07 AM
http://www.freehomepages.com/celebzone13/ToriSpelling/tori6.jpg
ya know guys and ugly gals, i can admit that i slam baseball wives out of 99 percent jealousy.
24. Posted by mutterhals on September 23, 2005 04:10 PM
Tori Spelling is ugly as sin, this is true no matter what the poster looks like
25. Posted by Queen LaQueefah on September 26, 2005 04:14 PM
She's funny looking and all that, but dude, what the hell is up with her lumpy boob? U ever notice that shit? It's like her titty is unhooking from her chest