Archive for July, 2004

Paris Hilton

July 30th, 2004 // 4 Comments

The answer is yes.

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Lindsay Lohan

July 30th, 2004 // 2 Comments

There’s nothing I can say about Lindsay Lohan that hasn’t already been said before. Simply put, she was this cutesy lovable girl in The Parent Trap that grew up to become a whore. In the latest issue of Rolling Stone Lindsay again showcases her huge boobs and deteriorating body in a much overhyped pictorial. I’m not saying that I don’t enjoy the big breasts (because I do), but it takes more than a giant rack to win me over. I need a pretty face to go along with massive hooters (I’m running out of breast terminology here), along with a healthy amount of “not being a whore.” I’ve never been a fan of Lindsay and I probably never will be. Unless she manages to make a quick turnaround and whip her image into shape a la Christina Aguilera, she’ll probably stay on my whore list forever. And not the good whore list which features actual pay-for-sex whores, but the bad list which is just lame actresses turned sluts.

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Alessandra Ambrosio

July 30th, 2004 // 12 Comments

20040730_aa.jpg Victoria’s Secret is going to college. The lingerie retailer unveiled the “Pink” line of cotton loungewear and sleepwear targeting 18- to 22-year-olds on Thursday. At the launch of the fall 2004 collection, model Alessandra Ambrosio shepherded 20 college students, who were selected from a nationwide search to be spokeswomen in university dorms. [read]

If there’s a tangible version of sexy, it’s probably Alessandra Ambrosio. There’s something about her face and body that sort of kicks me in the kidneys. That probably wasn’t a very good analogy, but it was the best way I could express how insanely hot this woman is. It’s to the point where I feel actual physical pain in my kidneys. Either that, or my damn kidney stones are acting up again. I’m always getting kidney stone pain confused with sexual frustration.

Alessandra Ambrosio Pink Gallery

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Richest Model

July 30th, 2004 // 4 Comments

20040730_rich.jpgThe press can’t seem to get their story straight as to who the wealthiest supermodel in the world is. It’s definitely between Milla Jovovich and Giselle Bundchen, who are each pulling in roughly $10 million, but accounts vary as to who’s actually making more. It’s sad to think that our society actually pays people more money for looking beautiful than for saving lives. If doctors could manage to look more like Giselle maybe they’d be making more money. And maybe I’d be accidentally hurting myself a whole lot more. Like eight times a day more.

Vogue says Giselle
Double Agent says Milla (with pictures)

The Superficial News

July 30th, 2004 // 3 Comments

– On the heels of The Scoop

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Alizee

July 29th, 2004 // 10 Comments

I’m sure a lot of you aren’t very familiar with the lesser known Alizee, and if you are, you probably only know her as ‘that French singer who wears the short skirts.’ Truthfully, I’ve never heard a single one of her songs and I never care to. As long as she keeps on wearing the shortest skirts imaginable, I’ll keep on pretending like I care about what comes out of her mouth. I wonder what it’s like knowing that your only claim to fame is that you happen to wear short skirts. Must be the same way Ryan Seacrest feels, except instead of wearing short skirts, he’s just a jackass.

View Alizee Video (.mpg)

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