1/100th of Scarlett Johansson’s bra! Bust out the bubbly! Oh, wait…

October 21st, 2009 // 70 Comments

You can tell how slow of a morning it’s been when I’m excited about the top of Scarlett Johansson‘s bra. (Whee!) However, on a more serious note, her breasts are definitely shrinking. And I don’t know what she’s paying her agent for, but if I were him, I’d be funneling an entire McDonald’s into her mouth until those things grew back. (Read: I’d be one of those sensitive agents you can talk about your feelings with. And boys!)

Photos: Getty, WireImage

  1. Marlene

    Congrats um, nothing more to say? just first. exciting. made your day did’nt it? wow. I am so impressed. wow.

  2. Irene Barcelo

    Oh, wise Superficial writer: Could it just be that she had been using push up bras all this time?

  3. Delgo

    Bitch needs to stop with the fuckin’ war paint already. She’s not Egyptian FYI

  4. Titty Rupskin

    She’s an attractive person. I hear most celeberites have abnormally large heads which make them photogenic. That and amazing genetics.

  5. Jarlath

    Way to end the sentence with a preposition.

  6. Oliver Chester The Molester Lester

    Ryan is sucking the life out of those titties.

  7. Ein

    This is a matter or national security. Somebody call the MiB.

  8. gross


    and god, you’re a fucking celebrity and your teeth are that yellow? gross.

  9. the_secretary

    I don’t think celebrities have abnormally large heads, but abnormally tiny bodies.

    That said, Scarlett is a beautiful woman.

  10. Willie Dixon

    She was cuter when she was a bit chunkier.

  11. Jen

    I think Scarlett had breast implant before and she just have them removed for now. Without breast implant, she just look normal like any other girl.

  12. ewwey

    holy makeup! you can barely see her eyes in the last pictures… nasty!
    that makeup looks so fucking gross! she’s got a nice face – god dont cover it so much!

  13. Randal(l)

    1/100th is enough to make a deposit into the spank bank. it doesn’t take much at all to get me going, Ladies.


  14. She looks like shit. Bad dress, bad makeup.

  15. jt

    sick boobs. that’s it. without them she’s nutin

  16. Jail


  17. bobbobbob

    She really did lose her boobs… she can barely make a decent cleavage! WTF!

  18. Harold^Sick

    Hottest woman alive today.

  19. Max Planck

    These are the same people who do Hennessy.

    Kanye West sucks it from the bottle straight, on camera.

    Admittedly, this sells a little better.

  20. Delgo

    brood sow

  21. Jessica

    Wow there are a lot of haters on here, personally I think Scarlett is gorgeous…but unfortunately she looks like she has botox eyes now…hard road for female actresses to stay “young”…they all end up looking wonky.

  22. gotmilk?

    she bores the shit out of me.

  23. Jenna

    She really looks entirely average. I guess it could be worse…but I wouldn’t pay to have her advertise my product if the only thing I’m using her for is her looks. :-/

    The dress is awful, too. Not a good cut for her. If you have an angular dress, you need to have the hips, boobs and shoulders to carry it. She may have looked good in it a few years ago…but now it’s kind of a red potato sack.

  24. Nom

    My sister and her husband bumped into her in New York. Apparently she’s gotten skinny for a part in a movie she doing or something. They said she’s like a stick!! lol

  25. Venom

    It’s obvious she’s lost a lot of weight (why I don’t know. She’s lost her charms. Maybe it’s for a movie role?). So with weight loss you get boob shrinkage… and even more scary is that they probably sag more than ever now.

    That said she’s still pretty. One of My favs. Just wish she didn’t give in to Hollywoods demands of being unhealthy-skinny.

  26. 1/2 bad

    She looks like one of her parents was beautiful and married and ugly person which is why she looks a bit…off. I think her mom was swedish. Wonder what her dad was? Must have been ugly.
    Waaaaaay overrated.

  27. Kathleen

    Scarlett!!! What the fuck!?
    Wipe off that make-up and eat some burgers! You are naturally beautiful and you’re making yourself look worse!
    Scarlett looks way better curvy! This is disappointing :(

  28. Fagballs

    That´s what we call the “christina ricci” – effect. Once totally hot girls with curves hunger/exercise so long until they´ve ruined their figure and resemble a plank of wood. Curse you Hollywood! CUUUURRRSSSEEEE YOUUUUUUU!!!!!

    Not cool. She used to have an awsome butt/waist thing going on too. It´s all gone now :(

  29. O'Roughly factor

    I know her type, shes planning to show those babies when no one is interested…

  30. ding a ling

    It’s called a push up bra fellows… better known as false advertising! She never had breasts.. only the illusion of some. Paris Hilton had a push up bra.. Remember? You can buy plastic inserts to.

  31. f

    Don’t know what all the fuss is about, this chick is butt ugly. I wouldn’t touch it with someone else’s dick.

  32. um

    32, yes, she did have breasts, but now she lost weight and her breasts along with it. A push up bra can only do so much. Case in point: Alessandra Ambrosio.



  33. ben

    Old curvaceous blond goddess we all lusted after is dead, now we have a very average looking actress in her place.

    What a shame

  34. me

    she’s an actress? Could have fooled me. If she doesn’t star in a decent film, and I mean fast, she’s toast. Her figure brought her fame and attention. Without her “charms” she’s going to lose her fan base… she can be a model. Since that’s what she is nowadays anyway….

  35. When did she start getting ugly? Guess JT does that to girls.

  36. mungbean

    The more weight she loses, the more unattractive she becomes. Also, what the fuck is that on her arm? Looks like a sticker. Lame.

  37. saw her tits in her last movie

  38. clpierced

    she used to be sooo pretty! wtf is up with the hair? ewww i hate reddish hair. she was hott as a blonde. scarlett some people look better with a little bit of weight on them and you are one of them. i used to be jealous of your boobs, now im not :( im sorryyy. but u have a pretty face still..well kind of :)

  39. PostmortemG

    Wow, she needs to eat something calorie-heavy and wipe that shit off her eyes/face. This lady *WAS* Scandinavian beautiful – I´ve yet to see any of her recent films (And by ´recent´, i mean almost everything she´s done), but her physicality was always amazing. I agree with everyone else who says she needs to gain the weight back.

  40. Venom

    I completely agree with #30. I used to have a huge crush on Christina Ricci up until she became as skeletal as Nicole Richie at her worst. I’ve never looked at her the same again cuz when she finally put some weight on she was built like a butch (Monster with Charlize Theron) and not the cute and curvy little thing with huge boobs (they’ve never gotten as epic as they used to be.) So sad.

    Hell, I’ll throw you one better. Remember when Jennifer Connelly had the best rack in the biz? Now she looks like absolute crap and her tits vanished! Sigh.

  41. Turd the third

    I think she should climb on top of that bottle and do the pink hole pogo. They we can see those boobies that everyone is talking about in action….whoooohoo

  42. Very cool and sexy snap.Something creamy snuff is exposed.

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  44. singlebullet

    ryan reynolds has obviously obliterated her mojo. gone.

  45. Again, I said it in the Lohan post. ScarJoist would have been a beast had she lived in the 1600′s. Braces on teeth, jaw/chin/jowles resculpting, nose job and cheek implants. Kids back then would have run in fear and nobody would want to date her, no less breed with her. Instead of being Woody Allen’s whore (oy!) she’d be just a whore in a Jewish ghetto, Askenazy style. Would never have what it even takes in those ghettos because she wouldn’t have her fake contact lenses.

  46. O'Roughly factor

    Base on research, that chest of hers is too amazing to be real!! I have doubts.

  47. sweetcaroline

    To all those who are freaking out because she has lost weight: she hasn’t! maybe five pounds or whatever, who knows, but i think some people are far too paranoid and quick to assume everyone in the world has an eating disorder or is starving themselves. She obviously isn’t starving herself- does she look skinny like a rake? hardly. she has the same curves. If you look at the style of this dress/the way the neckline is cut, it is obvious it isn’t the kind of dress you want your boobs pouring out of- cleavage isn’t always classy. she normally wears things that emphasize her cleavage, and likely some type of push up bra. this time, she just isn’t. i am a D, 5″7 and about 118 pounds- it is AMAZING the difference a bra can make. If i downplay my breasts, i easily look much thinner and less curvy all over, while if I let the girls out to play, i look a lot different. all this to say, stop being so hard on her. she is beautiful and probably hasn’t changed a bit!

  48. WOW! she looks really gorgeous in this red dress. May be she doing this to gain some attention….

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